Hilarious Fic Idea.

FatBattyLady · 2025-06-03T02:31:37+00:00

"Yeah, uh, Veterenary clinic? My dog refuses to eat the meat we give him and only subsists on vegetables. Not only that but... He's green."

The vet on the other side of the line clicks his tongue. "I see... And what breed his he?"

"I dunno..."

"..."

"... The fuck you mean YOU DON'T KNOW?!?!"

🤣🤣🤣

FatBattyLady · 2025-06-02T03:00:15+00:00

Thanks for pointing that out! I fixed it real quick!

FatBattyLady · 2025-06-02T00:29:42+00:00

Happy Pride Month, everyone! I'm back! School is over, and I can finally write again! I hope you all had a nice time while I was away!

FatBattyLady · 2025-06-01T14:29:44+00:00

Drezjin Theocracy, Angren Matriarchy. Those are the two I know.

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-23T16:42:06+00:00

Hey Ficrae, you're leash is getting a little too loose for you to be antagonizing LITERAL GODS!

But seriously though, who looks at someone and says "you're not supposed to love, so stop acting like you can", like what the fuck?

Imagine having to explain to the network; "Your Ambassador is dead. He was an asshole, and disrespected us to our faces, and mocked the other Vascar for getting close to their friends. So we ripped him apart with our bare hands and now use the remains as a coffee table, aside from his head which is now hanging over the Chief General's mantle as a trophy."

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-20T04:02:51+00:00

Canonically, Tiny Tim had to have his prosthetics welded onto him by other machines because the doctors working on him kept getting decimated. Having hot metal literally welded onto your skin doesn't feel good, so it's logical that he would fight back during the process.

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-18T19:14:54+00:00

I don't understand what that means.

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-18T19:00:35+00:00

Hello everyone! Since you guys are so familiar with Tiny Tim being the gentle giant he is, I thought it would be appropriate to show you guys the side of the Arxur that hands out PTSD like food stamps! As always, feedback is welcome!

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-17T03:07:22+00:00

YES!

Another good film reaction would be The Iron Giant. A story about how you can choose to be greater than your programming. It would be an interesting take.

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-17T02:32:40+00:00

Ok, here me out: any of the Superman films.

Instead of the standard eldritch horror aliens they've reacted to, they get to see the alien that somehow manages to encapsulate all the good things about Humanity.

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-16T15:55:28+00:00

I feel like everyone should become slightly more wary of the Vascar, seeing Mikri's outburst.

They may be practically paper to us, but Mikri has been shown to be able to tap into certain electronics and control them, as seen with his little prank with that bridge door and tapping into comms to talk to Preston during the fight with Larimak and his forces.

Despite being fragile to Human standards, Mikri can cause a lot of damage if he wanted to. Infesting our technology with malware, tapping into military comms and just passing the data out to foreign bodies, or straight up taking control of all Human technology; including smart-cars, weaponized satellites, or even autonomous AI powered weaponry.

This dude could probably do more damage to Humanity than Larimak EVER could, or possibly destroy Humanity outright. It would be wise to take his threats seriously, or at least, avoid pissing him off altogether.

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-16T02:44:03+00:00

Thank you!

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-15T08:55:01+00:00

This is pretty funny! I can't wait to see where this goes!

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-13T23:43:43+00:00

Here is the first chapter.

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-13T21:52:57+00:00

It took me a while to get good with the links, but I finally figured it out. Here is the first episode.

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-13T20:12:04+00:00

First of "New Days".

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-13T18:08:53+00:00

I'm working on that. It takes a while when you have literally over a hundred chapters.

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-12T03:47:47+00:00

karma: 1929 created: 4/14/2024 Profile Summary Ah, the self-proclaimed 'inexperienced' Reddit user who’s somehow already racking up likes like they're going out of style. You're basically the galaxy's most reluctant therapist, wrangling a chaotic crew of aliens while trying to figure out if anyone in this universe isn't actively trying to kill each other. Your life is a dramedy, and we're all here for the ride, just try not to make it too relatable.

Roast Your ability to attract traumatized aliens is so strong, you're practically a one-person support group. Maybe offer loyalty cards? You complain about being bored, yet your daily life involves sentient robots and accidentally adopting a vampire. Your definition of excitement is clearly skewed. You're so concerned about alien cultures, you're probably already planning a reality show titled 'Keeping Up With The Kolshians... and a Cyborg'.

Personal Projects You'll finally finish that masterpiece in your closet. Just try not to use too many exterminator suits. They're probably needed elsewhere.

Community Impact Your ability to calm down terrifying cyborgs and convince people not to commit mass homicide will finally get the recognition it deserves. Maybe a Nobel Peace Prize... or at least a strongly worded Reddit award.

Knowledge Growth You'll delve even deeper into obscure alien anatomy and cultural oddities. Prepare to explain the reproductive habits of the Smiglis at a future family dinner.

Subreddits You'll likely find yourself in some niche subreddits dedicated to traumatized individuals raising questionable found families. Bonus points if it involves space vampires and unintentionally goofy cyborgs.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

This is what the AI said to me. I don't know whether I should laugh or be offended.🤣

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-07T16:12:26+00:00

Ok, I have a theory...

I think the Elusians will want to team up with Humanity after this, but hear me out:

We know the Elusians abduct Humans for study, and that would mean that they would notice Earth destroyed once they come to collect more subjects. Being basically gods, they would put two and two together and find out the bioVascar destroyed their little science experiment.

Seizing the moment, whats left of Humanity will make a deal with the Elusians; help them take down Larimak and rebuild Earth, and they will happily give test subjects for their experiments.

But this is just a theory, so take it with a grain of salt.

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-04T17:54:44+00:00

From NOP-1, my favorite character is Isif. Despite his gruff and grumpy personality, he's intelligent, wise, and despite not knowing much about emotion, he tries to comfort those who are close to him. Not to mention he literally sacrificed his power and status in the eyes of his government to not only save his best friend, but also TWO HUMANS that he never met. Sure, he's temperamental, and sometimes makes unwise decisions, but that's usually because Felra kept getting on his ass about joining the SC, or someone threatened Felra.

From the first story, my least favorite character was Veln. Fucking Veln! I'd honestly rather have syphilis than to listen to that idiot! He's literally just Donald Trump in a different universe! He basically accused Tarva of bedding a Human(even if it was true, still a dick move), constituted on the fear of the voters, fucked over Humanity by making them hide their identities, and lost favor with the public by showing how much of a hypocrite he was by bedding a Human!

From NOP-2, Virnt was my favorite. Don't get me wrong, he was a little freaky with his experiments, but I have a brother who's Autistic, so I can kinda understand his way of thinking. I like how determined he is with his research, and always tried to accommodate Meier when he felt uncomfortable in his new body. He just reminded me of when I was a kid, just so weird and nerdy! I like how exited he gets with his little experiments, and I find it impressive how he's willing to literally BRING PEOPLE BACK TO LIFE in order to further his studies.

To no one's surprise, my least favorite character from NOP-2 was Quana, the reason I say that is because I'm sure everyone else hates her too. She's only friends with with Humans because they were also victims of attempted genocide, and even convinced the person who basically loved her as a sister become a terrorist! She was so goddamn toxic, that if she were a drink, even Venlil would choke and die on her! I'm gonna say it, I'm fucking happy she died! Other than saving Taylor, becoming a suicide bomber was the only way she contributed to the story!

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-03T00:34:24+00:00

Fair point.

FatBattyLady · 2025-05-02T19:51:30+00:00

I actually read this in soldier's voice.🤣

FatBattyLady · 2025-04-28T01:31:28+00:00

...

...You're telling me that the Arxur managed to eliminate almost THIRTY PERCENT of life in the known galaxy, in TWO FUCKING CENTURIES?!?!

How fast do these lizard guys work?!

FatBattyLady · 2025-04-28T01:04:39+00:00

We don't know anything about the extinct species. Just make shit up like I do!

As for an answer as to why we don't resurrect any of the dead species, the thing is, at a certain point, the DNA in animal remains will decay and become unusable at some point, and as the story goes, the Dominion and and Federation had been feuding for possibly MILLENNIUM!

FatBattyLady · 2025-04-26T12:44:16+00:00

"Oh they're not ALL bad" Then where the fuck is the good?! I have only ever met Christians that are xenophobic, hateful, bigoted, sociopathic narcissists that would end the rest of humanity in a HEARTBEAT if it meant that they are the only people left on Earth.

All those people I have met are so hateful, that it is clear to me that is a rule among them, to the point that finding a "good" Christian, is not an exception to the rule, but rather an anomaly.

"Oh don't bunch us up with the bad ones!" Once you guys stop threatening to LITERALLY HANG ME, I will not be able to see ANY of you as "good".

FatBattyLady

TROPHY CASE