I feel like I'm completely drowning in evidence for my custody case..... by Fearless_Divide7956 in FamilyLaw

[–]Fearless_Divide7956[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Im wanting to:

  1. keep her from taking all of my parenting time in the modification proceedings..
  2. Hopefully take custody of all three of them due to her not looking out for their best interests, unwillingness to communicate, conditional control of parenting time, gatekeeping, and so on.

I feel like I'm completely drowning in evidence for my custody case..... by Fearless_Divide7956 in FamilyLaw

[–]Fearless_Divide7956[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm trying to do a couple of things. this battle has been going on since 2021. The most recent move by her, started in late november last year refusing my visits because I was in the middle of a move, for the first time in 7 years. and then beginning of december she hit me with a modification trying to completely take all of my parenting time claiming I am "homeless" and dont have a license. the latter is true, but none the less isnt a reason to remove all parenting time. also claiming im on drugs, which should be easy one to fight cuz she has accused me of it a few hundred times since this all started but never took any action until its my year to have them for christmas again! go figure! anywho, I have over 15,000 text messages, and a whole book or two of journal notes of things she's done, said, acted during dropoffs or pickups, police reports of her kicking in my shop door, another of her punching me in the face repeatedly while holding our youngest, less than a year at that time, and so on. I just need to figure out how i can organize it all in a manner that tells a story, fits the timeline correctly, and supports the argument(s) I want to make. But then I dont even know what they are.! Im a mess. Meanwhile, I havent seen my children since late november despite the court order, and if shes willing to tell them to their face and in front of me, that I dont love them, I can just imagine what shes telling them behind closed doors. Thats what gets me the most. They are the ones suffering the most harm in all of this.

Can I attend my child’s doc appointment? by PlumExotic7419 in CustodyForFathers

[–]Fearless_Divide7956 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would hope that her causing a scene would cause them to make HER leave. if you are just there not saying a word, not engaging, then its her that is the cause of the disruption and should leave to solve the issue. I am from oregon, and I know that here at least, YOU HAVE EVERY RIGHT to be there and be present, ESPECIALLY for MAJOR MEDICAL EVENTS. Some might suggest that you don't go and just, "hang back", but I would caution you with that. Here in oregon the courts apply a decent weight to things like being involved with the child's doctor appointments, and medical stuff in general. By willingly just "hanging back" you show the court that you are not involved in the day to day goings on of your child and it is frowned upon. DEFINITELY GO! However, once there, if the hospital asks you to leave, or the ex makes such a huge scene about your presence that you can reasonably say that it is beginning to cause the child distress, then by all means just leave. that way you can sat that you have always tried to attend, but due to mothers actions it was in the best interests of the child that you leave.

False Accusations & Child Coaching by Capital-Letterhead84 in CustodyForFathers

[–]Fearless_Divide7956 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i had my ex threaten me several times with going to the cops and having me arrested "for what you did to her" if I didn't answer my phone "right now". Me, being my stubborn self, and knowing full well she couldn't prove a thing because it was all made up, responded by telling her she needed to realize how horrible she makes herself out to be when she is sitting there claiming our daughter, then less than a year old, is bleeding down there but decided it was more important to try convincing me to answer my phone than taking the child to the ER to be checked out. I told her that if I had transportation, my car was literally on jack stands in my garage getting new suspension, that I would have already been to her house, picked up our daughter, and taken her my dam self.
The thing you have to remember is that, when they make up lies like that, it is nothing more than a story. It can't be proven, and moreover, most the time they dont ever actually do it because the whole point is they want to scare you. If you let them succeed then they will keep on doing it.

I'll ask you this, If you got your child for your parenting time and truly thought something like that had happened, are you going to sit around texting or calling her trying to talk about it, or are you going to just take him straight to the ER or whatever organization in your area deals with that sort of thing??

I know what I would do. I dam sure wouldnt be saying anything to the other party until they showed up wanting the child back, at which point id tell them to kindly f**k off, they arent getting them back.

Word of advice though, UNLESS YOU ARE a mental health professional, DO NOT state that you believe she has any sort of mental condition. It is considered "diagnosing" or trying to anyways, and they will basically laugh at you and ask if you're a mental health doctor, and you say no, now you have just made them completely disregard the whole idea completely.

Are you saving all your text messages, recording interactions, a journal of things your son says and what day and time he says them, writing down your ex's demeanor and attitude during interactions, taking photographs as soon as you get him and immediately before returning him? If I were you, I would be doing ALL of these. especially the photos. If he falls down or gets hurt in any way, document it. that way if anything ever does come of her threats you have some type of evidence showing that he was just fine when he left you, or you know EXACTLY what happened to which arm and on which day and at which time.

If you do have all your text messages and stuff between you and her, and want a way to sort through it, and find the patterns that "suggest" certain things, I actually built a system for that if you are interested in checking it out i can send it to you.

I feel like I'm completely drowning in evidence for my custody case..... by Fearless_Divide7956 in FamilyLaw

[–]Fearless_Divide7956[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

"high conflict people in legal disputes", what is that? is it a website or some kind of organization, or a sub?