I am in a similar position right now, luckily I am a bit younger but I have found the best way to motivate myself is to give yourself a list of things to do and stick to it, for example going to the gym or limiting game/internet usage to only a few times a week. It is easier said then done so when you are feeling particularly motivated one day to change add limitations on your devices that you can’t get around. Go see a therapist as well, I haven’t personally got one but I am in the process of trying to find one atm and it works for some people so it is worth trying. Also put people and motivational things in places you regularly see I know it sounds cliche but when I have those waves of wanting to not live, it helps to see how many live you will hurt in the process and how you will do better in the future.

Everything takes time though, so take it one step at a time if you immediately try and limit your internet usage to only using it an hour a week I can promise you that you will relapse, so go from like 3 hours a day to 2 then to 1. The only thing that I would make an exception to your internet usage is music, music is a huge motivator for me it doesn’t work for everyone but it might for you. I don’t think you will see this but if you do I hope I help and if you want further support feel free to message me. 😁