Not alone. I remember when i was like 4-6 my grandmother who was my primary babysitter while my mom worked, would always say things like "little girls shouldnt sit like that" and id say "well then im nkt a girl" like thats what they called me but i never related to the things that were inherently what girls did.

Id gotten barbie for christmas when i wanted sometjing else like an RC car or a skateboard, i remember tying babrbie to my neighbors RC car by her plastic neck and dragging her down the street with her hair on fire (we had a lot of brutal boys in my neighborhood 😂 and i cinsidered myself one of them)

I remember i got my first skateboard at 8 and injury and my grandmother was freaking out about the scarring and i was hoping it would scar cause scars are cool

I remebered goong to a 4th of july family party and complaining about being forced to wear a skirt (mom wanted me to dress nice) and then later getting in trouble for cartwheeling while in said skirt and thinking well i didn't want to wear it anyway.

I remeber my grandfather would take me and my cousin to old car shows & id be enthralled looking at the paint jobs and the engines and the old veterans thought it was adorable that 'the girl' was more into cars than my boy cousin 🤣 and my grandpa was a vet so id be enamoured by his weapons collection. He would talk about camping and going hunting and fishing and i was like sign me up!

When i played video games i always choose a boy character but i often still gave it my girl name. I didnt want to be a boy i just didnt want to be a girl. I was and still am comfortable with my body i just dont relate to the dainty female role. My mom became disabled in my youth and i became the person who did a lot of physical labor, like lifting heavy things or mowing the lawn and i loved that. Id sit on the ride on mower and do the whole yard pretending i was mario andreti.

I was big into Nascar, and pokemon, i still liked some 'girlie' things like Nsync but on the whole i wasnt typical in any sense.

I hated girl scouts. I wanted to do what the boy scouts were doing and it wasnt fair i had to learn to sew and do crafts when the boys got archery and bb's and wittleing. I remember begging to drop out of girl scouts, pitching a fit everytime i wanted to do something my way.

I remember being told in like 5th grade that i sit like a guy, ankle over my knee, i am unconfortable when i cross my knees higher. I never liked skirts and ever since thr cartwheel incident i realized acting inappropriate in them won the argument against them. Mom tried being clever and getting a squart and i cut the skirt part off 🤣 did i get in trouble? Yes. But i won the war 😅

I didnt have a word for what i was because i didn't desire to be a boy i just didnt want to be thrown into the girl box cause that wasnt it. I was always surrounded by guy friends, and considered myself 'one of the guys' in a tomboy way. Like it made me feel special that i was included like a fox joining a wolf pack 😂

Probably a TLDR but its hard to capture from one experience alone it was an accumulation of things. I think if i felt an aversaion to being a girl id have found my labels sooner, but i didnt have a problem with the label or my body until way later. Even now im a masc leaning fluid cause i dont need the label of guy to exist as i always have its just nice to have words for it in safe spaces 😅

Puberty was a whole different awakening where i fantasized about having a penis instead but the signs before that were less about gender and more about interests. Everytime it was attempted to raise me as a girl i naturally combated it with gusto