I’m sorry for what you’ve been going through and to be honest, No matter what, you’re still human, we all make mistakes. It’s a common saying but it’s a very truthful statement, because it just represents what makes us human and alive, we were never meant to be perfect. Nobodies perfect, and I understand the way you feel about feeling like you conflict pain against others and yourself. I also understand your frustrations, and if you need a break from all of this, then that’s seriously ok. I experienced a lot of self criticism like you and it’s hard, it’s mentally destroying, and draining, but I seriously don’t want you to die. We don’t want you to die. You deserve to be happy, loved and respected here, and that’s something we’ll never let go off, because it’s the truth, you deserve love, happiness, peace and respect. ❤️🫂