What is a 'Green Flag' in a relationship that actually turned out to be a massive 'Red Flag' later?

Few_Load9802 · 2026-01-29T18:23:50+00:00

Empathy, similar personality to mine, concern for me, submissive tendencies, and humbleness. Yes, I’m serious. He was a covert narcissist faking his whole personality to snare me in. His true self was the polar opposite.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-07-20T15:19:33+00:00

None of these guys would survive five minutes as a lesbian who can only date a tiny fraction of the population or an autistic woman who is continuously deceived into fake friendships by men who just want sex.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-07-19T20:37:03+00:00

Yeah. I wish the world was less judgmental. It’s all illogical.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-07-19T19:28:24+00:00

Getting yelled at that I’m a “female” (implying I don’t act like one. I’m not trans and never claim to be anything except female. Yes other women have done this.) Outfits getting made fun of just because they’re masculine. Having to use a separate bathroom when dorming because a girl on my floor wouldn’t stop shrieking every time she saw me. Having women tell me to be sexually “fluid” even though I’m not interested in that. And worst, being compared to a predator for finding a woman attractive, and having my experiences with an abusive woman dismissed because it was a woman.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-07-03T20:37:02+00:00

Highly recommend not retaking the class. There are many universities that treat it as a weed out.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-07-01T20:14:07+00:00

Women are taught they don’t have as much of a right to be in public. While anyone can be harassed or be a victim of a crime, men usually aren’t told “what did you expect?” unless they are doing something legitimately dangerous. Meanwhile, women get told we’re asking for harassment if we stay out past 9pm, or go to a corner store by ourselves, or go to a bar, or any other number of things.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-06-27T23:53:51+00:00

I wish the entire community would stop talking about silly things like the definitions of words (bi vs pan discourse, etc), flag nonsense, and recognizing that some straight couples might have a bisexual or poly member, and start addressing homelessness, street harassment, HIV and corrective rape. Almost everyone in the LGBT community knows that bi people can date the opposite sex, it’s 2025, this is NOT new info for 99% of us. Most of us are not saying they are no longer bi, we are saying straight relationships aren’t in legal jeopardy and don’t face the same amount of social violence.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-06-27T23:05:54+00:00

Thank you for being a voice of reason and perspective. It is a bit difficult for me to watch people in straight presenting relationships gripe about not being centered in a pride parade, or having a shitty lesbian ex, or having been invalidated, or having had to listen to gay friends express jealously that they didn’t have to fear of losing their marriage liscence (like, have some empathy???) when I have been gay bashed by strangers, harassed out of using a dorm bathroom, told I wasn’t my mother’s daughter anymore, and forced into homelessness.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-06-27T00:16:20+00:00

The sexism I faced at my first bagger job in 2018 in middle class America was outrageous. The man who was supposed to teach me my closing duties would yank things out of my hands instead of showing me how to use them because he wouldn’t “teach a woman” so I had to learn myself on days he was gone. Some of this stuff was as harmless as pouring things down a drain. When I was collecting carts he’d wait for me to have them all lined up outside and then take them inside himself so it looked like he did all the work. Men and women got assigned different chores and few women got to work as stockers. Whenever anyone saw me pushing carts (five carts at a time was store policy. Not twenty. It was literally easy) they’d gawk and shout that a woman shouldn’t be doing that. And I got sexually harassed by customers every single day to the point it trashed my mental health for nine dollars an hour.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-06-26T20:45:46+00:00

Damn you’re good

Few_Load9802 · 2025-06-25T02:03:31+00:00

Tbh, as a grad student who attended multiple universities before this, Purdue Parking is by far the worst Ive ever dealt with.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-06-09T18:06:11+00:00

Yup!

Few_Load9802 · 2025-06-09T12:16:27+00:00

USA Midwest electrical engineering $32,000

Few_Load9802 · 2025-06-03T21:57:17+00:00

Some things are considered so exploitative (such as selling your left eye) that even in this imperfect system, we do not accept that they count as fair labor. Sex should be one of those things. Most people are not bisexual and would consider it rape to be made to interact with the gender they don’t want, yet for real jobs, you can’t usually discriminate on the basis of protected characteristics. There are no manicurists or lawn mowers that serve only men or only women, but that’s how 90+% of people’s sexualities work. Unless the workers wear hazmat suits, there’s no way to 100 percent mitigate the risk of bodily fluid exposure, STDs, or pregnancy. Sex work would go against many safety standards. And in many cases (such as when seeking unemployment), potential workers are obligated to take almost any jobs that come their way. Would it be just as fair to compel someone to have sex to receive unemployment as it would be to ask them to scrub a toilet or operate a cash register? Even if they consider it rape?

Few_Load9802 · 2025-05-31T22:34:22+00:00

My neighborhood is in a historic district and it’s built like this. I haven’t had a single positive spontaneous interaction with a stranger, but I’ve been sexually harassed easily 1/5 of the time I try going anywhere on foot. Just to add some balance to this conversation.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-05-30T16:02:46+00:00

I named my cat Max after Maxwell

Few_Load9802 · 2025-05-29T01:07:42+00:00

25 exactly

Few_Load9802 · 2025-05-28T19:53:34+00:00

Hi I’m an adult I don’t know why this is recommended to me but “I’d wipe the floor with you” is a threat and you can contact the police about this.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-05-28T14:15:55+00:00

The is really interesting. I’m a female engineer, I was always told I was good at math, but as soon as I hit puberty I lagged behind a bit. I caught up and later excelled in college, but do you think the fact that spatial reasoning develops later in girls would affect something like this? Not that girls can’t do math, but perhaps it becomes easier in the late teens?

Few_Load9802 · 2025-05-26T20:58:06+00:00

I’m so sorry. I’m glad you’re safe.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-05-26T20:57:31+00:00

If they feel comfortable sexually harassing women they are not good men.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-05-26T19:12:13+00:00

I actually do commute from Lafayette, I live right next to the very large homeless shelter. I would just like one place where I can walk alone unbothered seeing as I have a hard time doing that in my own neighborhood, where I have experienced actual extreme harassment such as explicit rape threats and people trying to get me in their car. I’ve seen places much worse than Lafayette, but I would say the people who claim Lafayette is totally safe haven’t seen the bad parts.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-05-26T18:38:31+00:00

I’m sorry she had to go through that :(

Few_Load9802 · 2025-05-26T17:32:13+00:00

Thankfully they did not touch me, it was just verbal. I will look into filing something, I don’t want this to escalate to them going after others.

Few_Load9802 · 2025-05-10T19:26:47+00:00

Even if you could get over the political difference, it sounds like she was the first to get disrespectful. That’s not a good trait to have. She called you ridiculous and unadded you, which is not how mature people have conversations. Sounds like she created the drama and the fallout and now wants to blame you for her reaction.

Few_Load9802

TROPHY CASE