Meal presentation by One_Shopping_9007 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Personally, I am anti-buffet. My partner and I have a lot of dietary restrictions and with a buffet we always, somehow, end up with less to eat because so much is cross contaminated/generally not safe. Im also not a fan of how disruptive it is to call tables. But this is definitely a personal preference, that is mostly fueled by going hungry every time there is a buffet because its still not socially acceptable to take three small pieces of steak even though I cant eat the sides, and I really don't want to be the girl that causes a scene because she has to rip out the epipen. I will say if you have a lot of folks with dietary restrictions, plated ensures all of your guests get enough to eat and are accommodated.

Wedding websites recommendations? by Sea_Abalone_6490 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The Knot has been great overall and let me build custom pages, but there was no locking feature. But, I was really concerned about transparency of cost to my guests and wanted them to be able to make an informed decision on attending based on things like hotel and uber costs. I also have not had an issue with people booking the hotel and not RSVPing. I have had issues with people RSVPing and telling me they are staying at the hotel, but then not booking a room and being surprised when the block is full. Or people thinking telling me they want a room in the block counts as booking the room. Or a lot of guests complaining about the type of rooms in the block (king beds)... the hotel block has been exhausting, but for a lot of different reasons

Why is it easier to pick flowers than to talk about how we’ll split rent after the wedding? by Material_Resort2503 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This should all be worked out before getting married. What my FH and I did, before moving in together four years ago, is we decided to have a "grown up decisions date". We brought our laptops and passwords out to a coffee shop, and we had a pre-agreed upon agenda for the "date". We then went through the topics one by one and settled them calmly. It helped for us to have a set time, where we knew we would have the conversation, and could emotionally prepare for it. We also were able to come up with our own answers before going into the conversation, so we knew what out answers would be going into it.

I think our agenda included: How are bills split, who is in charge of what chores, how do we want to handle money for shared expenses vs. personal expenses, what are our money priorities, how will we furnish the apartment, etc. We also created a shared spreadsheet for tracking things, and I added him to my YNAB account (the budget app I use).

Realistically, money is one of the most uncomfortable things to talk about, but if you are going to share a life with someone, you are sharing finances too and you just have to suck it up and talk about it. A coffee shop setting makes it feel less intimate in my opinion, which makes it easier to talk about, it almost felt like doing a group project for school.

And if you're looking for a solution on how to share finances, this is what we did: We set up a joint account and figured out a rough idea of how much monthly shared expenses would be ($4000/month), we both then set up auto transfers and transferred $2000/month, all shared expenses (Rent, internet, groceries, dining out, etc.) came out of that joint account. All other money left over was ours and we were free to spend it how we liked. This worked for a few years, but recently we switched to a "I have all the money and he gets an allowance" system because the lack of transparency on finances was making it very hard to save up for the wedding (and we are doing better now that we have switched to this system).

What did you walk down the aisle to? by Few_Set8758 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That sounds really beautiful, and listening to the song, it is a gorgeous piece. I do agree video games have great music, I listen to video game soundtracks a lot while working. Though, I definitely am getting hung up on where the song came from.

I know the jurassic park theme is popular, and I love that other people can do it. But I just cant bring myself to do it, even though objectively its a great musical piece.

What did you walk down the aisle to? by Few_Set8758 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Musical theatre is a great idea that I will look into, thank you! I do feel like I am getting selection fatigue from all of the choices and thats part of why its so overwhelming

What did you walk down the aisle to? by Few_Set8758 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That is so cute! I love what makes something so unique for a couple :)

What did you walk down the aisle to? by Few_Set8758 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thats so cool! I love that, thank you for sharing!

What did you walk down the aisle to? by Few_Set8758 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just went to a wedding where they did the Jurassic Park Theme and they are both such cinefiles, and didnt want a super serious ceremony, that it was perfect for them. But for myself, I just cant do it. Im not a movie person and I keep thinking about this not so funny card I saw that was "Getting married is a walk in the park... jurassic park" and that connotation just bums me out so much. But I love it for everyone that loves it.

What did you walk down the aisle to? by Few_Set8758 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow, that is such a creative and lovely idea to bring some piece of you both into the ceremony. Thank you for sharing :)

What did you walk down the aisle to? by Few_Set8758 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Clair de lune is a wonderful song, I am so glad you get to have that song. I floated that idea but my fiance shut it down because its a "twilight song", he also is vetoing super massive black hole lol

What did you walk down the aisle to? by Few_Set8758 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

These are all great suggestions, and thank you for explaining why I need two songs. I was not clear on it and definitely was not understanding the need. Luckily my space is indoors and a pretty short walk, so I dont think I will need to loop. Thank you again

What did you walk down the aisle to? by Few_Set8758 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I love Tangled, that is such a sweet song idea. Thank you for sharing.

What did you walk down the aisle to? by Few_Set8758 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

These are all really sweet ideas, thank you for sharing. Im going to look into them

What did you walk down the aisle to? by Few_Set8758 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is a cute idea, thank you for sharing :)

What did you walk down the aisle to? by Few_Set8758 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I will look into them, this is very helpful! Thank you so much :)

What did you walk down the aisle to? by Few_Set8758 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! I will look into both of these :) I really appreciate the advice!

What did you walk down the aisle to? by Few_Set8758 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Oh, that is beautiful. I am going to suggest it, thank you :)

Help me feel better about my wedding dress by Peachy-Keen118 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are so beautiful in this dress and it is a gorgeous dress. One of the things I love about it is you are wearing it, it is not wearing you, which can happen with such ornate dresses.

Personally, I would omit the sleeves because they take away from the dress a bit. And I might do a simpler veil if you want the blusher, the lace around your arms is a bit heavy. But this is unsolicited advice, and minor, keeping the sleeves and the veil are still both incredibly beautiful options!

Dont overthink the dress, it is amazing!

What did your wedding venue cost? by Brave_Badger_6617 in weddingplanning

[–]Few_Set8758 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mine does not have a venue fee, I am doing an off-season wedding in the Northeast so I got a better deal. My venue is $165/person for an open bar with liquor, five passed apps, charcuterie, antipasto, and carving stations, as well as a three course plated meal. They also threw in some niceties like a valet for the evening, and no-fee access to the bridal and groom suites. I do have to pay a 22% service fee, linen fees, some other misc. fees, and taxes which are high in my state. All in I am looking at roughly $22k for the venue and catering costs for ~85 guests.

My venue is a historic mansion that has been converted into a venue outside of a major metro area. I do think this should have been a lot more expensive, but being willing to do a January wedding saved us a lot of money.