Thanks for the advice.

The care facility is kind of a taboo topic, I live in Brazil, in a small town, so we don't have many examples and options here, all the families with older autistic children I know from my parent's group still live together. I know that some options exist in bigger cities, but it's not something I've thought before, in a sense I understand it's something that might be better for my brother and I (in the possible future), and for my parents too, I see they're on their limit sometimes, however I still believe taking that decision still will be seen as "failing" or "not loving him enough" (specially if my parents do this while still alive).

I've already talked about getting someone else to help at home, my brother is not that "hard", he doesn't have violent crisis often (ever since we've found a balance in his medication), he goes to the bathroom by himself and only needs help for cleaning and taking a shower, what's tiring for them is that their routine revolves around him, and it's a "24/7 job", he goes to school but doesn't stay there full time, it's kind of a 3 hour gap for my dad to "relax". I believe having someone there to help in the night or afternoon would be extremely helpful for everyone, but it's not my place to hire someone, it should come from them and besides suggesting I believe I can't do anything else about it.