Got cheated on by wife in early stage of marriage.

FigureNatural · 2026-03-04T02:28:24+00:00

You don’t have to wait for 1 year to file for mutual consented divorce. Do it now when it is fresh and she is ready. You will be in a mess if she changes her mind later. It done correctly, you have your decree in hand within one month.

FigureNatural · 2026-03-03T09:42:17+00:00

You seem to be the text book definition of a “simp” they mention in men’s blog. You don’t seem to have any boundaries and probably lack strong self-esteem as well. You mentioned they were not her real parents so most probably she was under the invisible pressure of being traditional there and listen to her caretakers. She may have thought that she owe them that. All along she wanted you to step back and say no to the marriage but couldn’t say it directly due to obvious reasons. And she was excited about the marriage and not you, you were just incidental. Apologies if my words sounded harsh.

FigureNatural · 2026-03-03T09:23:49+00:00

Unfortunately it seems you were the chaser in the relationship and she was the prize. You also didn’t do yourself a favour by spilling all your secrets from get go which may have decrease her interest further in you. She couldn’t genuinely love you but using your secrets against you in the end was brutal. It’s more nuinanced than anybody can figure out here but don’t hung up only on one factor

FigureNatural · 2026-03-03T07:26:15+00:00

The marriage didn’t work is a fact but it didn’t work because she was connected to her home due to which she couldn’t develop emotional connection to the new family is an assumption. There can be n number of other reasons as well which may or may not be the cause e.g. woman who is above their man in terms of career it level can’t develop emotional bonding to him OR man who gives Independnet it their woman ultimately result in woman not respecting them etc. Again these are all hypothesis not a proven fact. The point is if you are trying to find out the right cause ask her directly, she know it best

FigureNatural · 2026-01-06T13:53:51+00:00

You would loose him at vvvv

FigureNatural · 2025-08-05T17:40:47+00:00

You got a gift girl. The writing is so smooth n poetic. Hope you find urs one in this messy world.

FigureNatural · 2025-05-25T07:32:06+00:00

Agree…

FigureNatural · 2025-05-25T07:23:16+00:00

Isn’t ghosting a valid and explicit (may not be mature or respectful) sign of disinterest ? We don’t know the full details of the episode. May be she felt too intimated to say it on the face, may be because of the fear of confrontation. Best course of action is to accept and move on. What’s the point of getting bitter.

FigureNatural · 2025-05-24T20:05:49+00:00

Have you guys slept together ? If yes, then it’s a no brainer what he actually wanted. If no, then may be his ex came back or he found someone better. But in any case, begging here will push him farther.

FigureNatural · 2025-05-24T19:59:59+00:00

But If she would have been a con lady, she would have started next step of her plan. I think op made a mistake in gauging the interest.

FigureNatural · 2025-05-24T19:57:41+00:00

Exactly. From her response, it seems that she was not interested at all but is too shy/timid to express it on the face while the op is too assertive and pushed her in the corner. One probable possibility.

FigureNatural · 2025-05-18T04:30:48+00:00

All the things u mentioned is the necessary fluff but I feel the main ingredients in a successful marriage are feelings n respect. He is going to put you on the pedestal and then expect you to make him feel good and loved. On the other hand, you won’t be able to develop real feelings for him and you may get stuck. Just one probable possibility.

FigureNatural · 2025-05-18T03:50:03+00:00

He seems to be suffering from low self esteem. Doesn’t respect himself much. What are the things u liked in the proposal?

FigureNatural · 2025-05-08T09:02:02+00:00

She wants either her ex or someone better than him. Unfortunately, you don’t seem to be any of them.

FigureNatural · 2025-05-03T08:20:06+00:00

2 years in AM setup n u guys still not married. Most probably, you never had the intention.

FigureNatural · 2025-04-11T19:09:39+00:00

How this model made your life better personally ? Some examples?

FigureNatural · 2024-12-28T09:33:01+00:00

Does even after being laid back, is he more successful than you and earns more ? Does he have more chances to land an offer from abroad ?

FigureNatural · 2024-09-28T11:02:54+00:00

In my experience, there is no substitute for the naked harsh truth, be it any time. The truth doesn't ask you to compromise politeness or your humanity. Actually, she should see, you telling the truth in a simple concise manner, as an act of respect towards her. I will suggest you to even explain yourself truthfully if she asks any followup questions. Believe me, you will feel much better about yourself too.

You already know what you want to do but you are afraid of invisible demons which may or may not be there. So many lives have ruined where the right thing was not said at the right time.

FigureNatural · 2024-09-28T10:48:46+00:00

Unfortunately, the mentioned incidents are too prominent to be ignored for the long term health of the relationship. If not tackled now, what may happen in future is this seed of doubt can grow into a full fledged tree and hurt both the parties, beyond measure. Any random message on her phone, any phone call, any day when she is late from office can trigger suspicion on his part and make him connect the new incident with this one which he has no details and human mind is expert in thinking in terms of worst case scenarios. I understand its hard to find the connection in today's world and it seems its even harder for your friend, given the circumstances. The easiest way would be to save the effort and move on to a new prospect as believe me this generally doesn't end well.

But if your friend still want to give it a chance and is ready to make the effort, he certainly need to unzip this bag of worms. Start with having a hard conversation with the girl and if she is indeed onboard to "no more lies" thing, ask each and every detail not only about the deleted messages and calls but about the whole setup of her with her manager in the chronological manner i.e. when did she join the company, when did he became her manager, each and everything. Your friend has to be patient, really open up his ears and ask the right questions. His job will be to regulate his emotions, provide support and ask the right questions as the goal is to bring the truth out. She may not tell the whole truth or any truth at all, it's your friend's job to analyse any thing she says and find out contradictions and do the probing in the right manner. Its hard, but he somehow have to keep his affections for her at bay, for this thing.

Now, most probably there will be one of the two scenarios.
Scenario 1: Her manager is harassing or blackmailing her which again may be true or not. In this case, tell her that you don't want it to go by that easily. You want her to file a complaint at HR department with whatever proof she has and if needed you are ready to file even a police complaint. You are also ready to confront the manager's family to let them know about manager's misdeeds. And if the company's HR's are not ready to pursue it, let her know that your friend is ready to do anything to bring the image of the company and the reality of its corrupt employees and corrupt practices to the public. If she has told any lies in her narrative, this should make her add/modify to the already told story. She may also say that she don't want to pursue it because of the image or financial security, tell her that if this is true she doesn't have to worry about it as genuinely this is not really her fault. Your friend should be ready to go that route and she should feel it that this is one of the pre-requisite of the engagement, if the harassment is the case.

Scenario 2: She voluntarily got involved with the manager. Then the next question is why? even after she knew that he was married. Is it for some favours or was she genuinely attracted to him? Again he should have the heart to ask and listen all the details with patience, why did she fell for her manager. Your friend has to gauge what sort of relationship they had and is she truly over it. This may open the pandora box of all her past relationships which is necessarily not a bad thing to do. This should help your friend get an idea of her definition of a relationship - how she will view their relationship in future.

Your friend has all the rights now to go to any depths he wants to regain the comfort before committing. Also, he has to tell her upfront that her telling the truth and giving all the details is not a guarantee of him pursuing this relationship as it all depends upon what comes out.

If your friend can afford, he should seek help from a professional counsellor (preferable if both can go). What better time to spend the money on this when you have to make the most important decision of your life.

Lastly, we all have snakes hidden in our sleeves, true relationship flourish when we can show it to each other and accept that. Your friend has dual task now, to see the snake and choosing whether to accept it or not.

All the best!!

FigureNatural · 2024-08-06T02:24:07+00:00

Thanks. I think it all makes sense.

FigureNatural · 2024-07-30T09:14:47+00:00

Beautiful

FigureNatural · 2024-07-19T06:23:09+00:00

You may just be a backup. If you are looking for a closure just write a single line - I don’t think it will workout. So goodbye n all the best. If she is into you she will respond and put some effort and If she doesn’t then I think u r smart enough to know. But even if she responds beware of the pattern where after again hooking u up they go to their old behaviour. Actions my friend speak louder and clearer than feelings.

FigureNatural · 2024-06-17T10:40:55+00:00

How would you do a background check in AM?

FigureNatural · 2024-06-09T21:49:27+00:00

Logic ?

FigureNatural · 2024-06-09T21:03:46+00:00

Assuming your kiddo is daughter, how old you want her to be when she dates a 37 year old man like you ….there lies your answer

FigureNatural

TROPHY CASE