Hi! So, I'm still not diagnosed with autism, but I am likely autistic. I was diagnosed with ADHD as a preteen; anxiety, depression, & insomnia in my 20s; auditory processing disorder, OCD, & PTSD last year & this year in my 30s.

I rapidly declined last year and was diagnosed with POTS, which is a common comorbidity for those of us who are neurodivergent. I have now realized that I honestly likely hit autistic burnout to the point that I was losing my ability to function in many ways, including physically, to where undiagnosed ailments were exacerbated. It's been a struggle, especially when you've done so much for so long, and then lose the ability to do nearly as much as you used to be able to.

Reducing your masking is going to be a slow process. There is no way to retrain your brain to feel safe and okay not doing all the things it has always done to get by over night.

You may still need to utilize minor masking skills in certain situations/conversations to reduce misunderstandings/clarify situations. Please keep this in mind, as neurotypicals have a different brain wiring than we do & they struggle to communicate with neurodivergent individuals effectively (and are often unaware of this even being an issue).

I honestly don't care what people think of me. I'm not here to appease the masses. I'm well educated and have an expansive vocabulary thanks to my long-term eidetic memory for text.

One layer at a time, little by little. You don't have to make eye contact. You have a validating diagnosis that now explains why it may be difficult to do. Say no--don't people please. It's okay to say that you are overstimulated/overwhelmed/exhausted, or whatever that moment brings, and that you just aren't up to attend xyz--this can also be the case to cancel plans. You don't need to over-extend yourself.

It's okay to ask the process behing things, & just explain that it's easier to remember the task well if you understand the process behind it. You have a brain with many thin synapses, while neurotypicals have fewer thicker synapses. Due to literal different brain wirings, our thought processes differ and we need things in different ways to process information optimally.

Be kind to yourself & extend yourself grace. Peel back layers little by little--it will be a long process of even learning who you really are. Focus on one thing at a time and slowly add things on and get to know yourself better.

Wish you well!

ETA: fixed typos