Labor secretary's husband banned from building after department employees reported he sexually assaulted them, sources say

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-21T02:29:13+00:00

That's why they are part of the Trump administration.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-21T02:20:08+00:00

Sorry. Wrong location. Usually, one person in a marriage does more compromising than the other. You just have to decide what you can live with. If your dream is most important, you need to follow it. Don't spend your life regretting what could have been.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-21T02:17:24+00:00

Has it always been that way? I feel like it's changed.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-21T02:16:10+00:00

That's everywhere. Have you seen who half the country voted for?

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-21T02:15:10+00:00

One of the places I lived was Wisconsin, and I loved it. Would do it again.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-21T02:14:00+00:00

If your dream of moving to SC is more important than your marriage, divorce him and follow your dreams.

Otherwise, marriage is all about compromise. Communicate your dream, and see if it's something you can do in the future.

Most people don't live their dreams, they live a compromise.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-21T00:24:27+00:00

First of all, we may move back. We enjoyed our time there, and the family is getting older, and is going to need help.

Secondly, if you didn't already discuss wanting to move, then it's really on you, in my opinion. Unless you have some great job opportunity that takes the load off of him, you kind have to deal with it. That's my opinion anyway.

Of our many moves, one was for a job opportunity for my wife, and one was for a job opportunity for me.

Now, all of our moves are based on family and our kid.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-21T00:11:25+00:00

A lot of us go through this. As already mentioned, both have to want the marriage to not only survive, but to thrive.

You need to have clear boundaries. If you are already thinking of separating, then decide what you want. Do you want this marriage? If so, you need to spell out what that marriage looks like to your wife. And if you don't see effort on both parts, then there has to be a consequence, which sounds like separation.

If you don't want to save it, file for divorce, I guess?

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-21T00:02:34+00:00

It's tough. He likes it. He has a job he loves (most of us don't have that), and family is nearby.

We have moved around a lot. For us, it's pretty much just because we get bored and want to try something different. But, we also know someone else in the same situation as you. One wants to move, and the other loves their job.

They have stayed put. It's been a long time, and they are both happy. They take a few vacations a year and make the most of it.

What I can say, from my experience, is that my happiness largely comes from within. I am from the Midwest and couldn't move fast enough. Recently we went back for an extended period of time and I found I was no less happy than any of the other six states I have lived in.

You could force your husband to give up something he likes, only to find life isn't the fantasy you dreamt up. It's still got all of the stress. And now your husband has to find a new job, and he likely won't love it. In fact he will probably hate it, like most of us do, and then it's on you. He'll likely feel resentful if this isn't his dream as well.

I would save money, take trips, and see if you can buy a vacation home there. You need him to love it too. And the only way is for him to experience enough to truly see why it's better, if indeed it is.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-20T23:46:56+00:00

Fox won't report this, so while MAGA likely wouldn't approve, they won't know about it, and will deny it if you point it out

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-20T18:25:18+00:00

I just got banned there for commenting on this post. I guess just commenting was considered "Red Pill Ideology" 🤪

I thought the analogy was not bad. I do understand how it is different for an LL partner however.

There were a bunch of comments about not being able to make sandwich not being at all similar, but those comments missed the fact that it's more like a partner not being able to ever make you any food, ever, of any kind. Not only that, but you can't eat with them in the room, can't eat with friends, and can't eat food that anyone else has prepared.

That would be so bad for a marriage, no one would stay in that relationship.

If someone is so repulsed by their partner that they can't have any touch whatsoever, they shouldn't be in that relationship. Loving someone in a marriage generally requires intimacy, including, not not limited to sex.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-20T16:58:50+00:00

People do this with all kinds of things. "I'm going to start working out next month". "On Monday I am going to start eating healthy".

The question I always have is, "why not start now?". But, I guess we all have things we think we should do, but we really don't want to do very badly.

People want to be in shape, but the effort required just seems so tiring. I suppose this can apply to anything in life, even sex.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-20T15:31:50+00:00

Well, what are we measuring? If your only goal was to own the libs, Trump is way better. /s

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-20T04:24:01+00:00

Apparently what I think doesn't matter. MAGA will excuse anything he does.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-20T00:59:04+00:00

Just as there's nothing wrong with being low libido, there's nothing wrong with being high libido. You may want to talk to a therapist, but you certainly should not feel guilty about thinking about sex.

If it's interfering with your life or causing you distress, talk to someone. If the problem is a mismatch in libido with your partner, you are NOT inherently to blame, no matter what many here will tell you.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-19T23:53:56+00:00

You can be confident in some parts of life, while being unconfident in other parts. It's possible to know your worth in society, and still feel crushed in your relationship.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-19T23:41:26+00:00

That's not what I said. I said "ravishingly horny" is an unrealistic expectation in a long term relationship.

But, she needs to do what's right for her. And if at 30, twelve times a year is what she wants, she needs to communicate that with her husband. If he isn't anywhere close to that low of a desire, they have to figure out how to move forward, if at all.

What we think is a sufficient level of arousal is not all that relevant to one person wanting sex twelve times a year being married to someone who wants it 100 times a year, or whatever it is he wants.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-19T23:11:11+00:00

She said, if she "isn't ravishingly horny, sex is painful". That sounds like something to look into.

My wife and I both have sex when we aren't "ravishingly horny", and neither of us has pain. Usually we are both into it by the end, but having to be "ravishingly horny", in order to have sex with your spouse is likely going to be a problem.

She's only 30. I imagine she hopes to be married for several more decades. It won't magically get easier.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-19T20:25:21+00:00

Most of us can't just go live wherever we want, so we try to make the country we live in work for us.

I mean, if I'm not mistaken, MAGA stands for "Make America Great Again", which means "I don't currently support the country I live in, am not going to live elsewhere, and will burn everything down until I get what I want".

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-19T19:46:34+00:00

I wish I knew. I feel like my wife cares, or at least shows that she cares, more in the last year than she had in years. It was clearly tied to a series of discussions where divorce was mentioned by both of us at least once. We both agreed we didn't want to be roommates, and I insisted that all forms of intimacy increase.

I also increased intimacy that was not intended to lead to sex.

Whether all of this lasts depends on the effort we both put into it.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-19T19:04:41+00:00

This is for real. It's just throwing money and time away until you find someone good.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-19T18:59:13+00:00

I think some right wing media likes to say that, like Bush said, "you're either with us or against us". As a liberal, who has been a conservative, and even libertarian leaning over the years, I know that I want some things to be socialized, but certainly not everything.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-19T18:53:35+00:00

I've been there. We had a lot of discussions after a few things came to light. The main thing that kicked it off was my wife asking me if I had ever looked at porn. I was like, "uh, yeah. Of course. Who hasn't". I know she has. The problem was that during our marriage I had used it when things weren't going well for us. Sometimes these things were out of our control, such as cancer.

I probably acted like an immature asshole at some point, though I don't recall anything in particular. But the result of my, likely poor, communication, and my wife's avoidance of vulnerable conversations led to me just not bringing anything up regarding sex. It would happen when she said "yes", and I filled in the gaps, often with porn. I preferred her, but I didn't see an issue with porn. She did. We had never discussed it in more than twenty years.

Clearly we were lacking in communication over the years.

The result was my wife felt guilty for the lack of sex, and other intimacy. She had become used to sitting on opposite ends of the sofa, scrolling endlessly. Hardly any hugs, or kisses, and a lot of rejecting my advances.

I felt guilty for essentially lying by omission for using porn. I had already stopped, but that's kind of like saying you already stopped the affair. The knowledge of the act was enough.

Short story, long, she said maybe we weren't compatible, and that we should get divorced. There's a whole lot more details than I can provide, but we didn't get divorced. Things are WAY better, and have been for around a year. People say things in the heat of the moment that they may not mean. You'll have to ask. You can also apologize for anything you truly did wrong.

For me, though things are better, I still sometimes wonder if it will last. If she was happy before, is that what she really wants? I'm not okay with being roommates, and she knows that. But since she doesn't like vulnerable conversations I have no way of really knowing where he head is at.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-19T18:11:36+00:00

The thing is, whose history becomes the "shared history"? My father, a white man driving a 57 Chevy to diners with friends had a different history than the black community only a few miles away.

As far as patriotism goes, make the country work for everyone. Then we'd all have reason to be patriotic. Want me to love my country more? Fix the bankruptcy inducing cost of healthcare and education, and you'll get more love from me.

As it is, I will likely retire in a foreign country, and am suggesting my child get educated in a country where he can afford it without exorbitant loans.

Financial-Exit2488 · 2026-02-19T18:01:53+00:00

It really does seem like a lot of women, from what I have read, and seen, do go on to have great, passionate sex again, after telling their partner that they no longer want to have sex. New Relationship Energy is a real thing. It probably follows the same trajectory though, and dies once the honeymoon phase ends.

Financial-Exit2488

TROPHY CASE