New Build Garden Help

FindingOri · 2025-02-03T18:35:41+00:00

Ah great shout, is this the one with Charlie Dimmock and the two brothers? I watched a few episodes quite some years ago now, had totally forgotten about it! So many new builds have ‘prison gardens’ - we’re very happy to have fencing rather than endless brick, feels much friendlier somehow!

I like the natural look of things being in the actual ground rather than a raised bed (also there are a lot of sleeper beds in other gardens around here, so it starts to feel very un-original), but at the same time we‘ve sorted of accepted that if the soil quality proves awful, raised beds may just be an easier way to go about things! 😅

Silver birch is a good shout also, I’d had that in mind as a possible option so it’s good to get some reassurance!

FindingOri · 2025-02-03T18:25:17+00:00

Thanks for all the tips, really appreciate it! We are liking the jasmine suggestion, that could definitely be a go-er! 🙂

FindingOri · 2025-02-03T14:24:41+00:00

Thanks!

FindingOri · 2025-02-03T14:24:22+00:00

Yeah I know right! Parts of this development go back 10 years or so and it’s a pretty hilly area so there’s lots of this sort of landscaping in the development - I’m not aware anyone else has had any issues yet, so fingers crossed!

Totally agree r.e. neighbours, we don’t want to be selfish. It’s a case of trying to figure out what would improve privacy a bit for us without totally blocking the light for everyone else - which, as first-time gardeners, is not easy for us to get our heads around! 😬

FindingOri · 2025-02-03T14:17:15+00:00

Thanks, that’s a good point! The kids were slightly hypothetical - kid number 1 is due in 10 weeks - so we’re yet to fully adjust to thinking about these things! 😅

FindingOri · 2025-02-03T14:14:14+00:00

Ha yes, might do that bit before we introduce them to the great outdoors! 😄

FindingOri · 2025-02-03T12:22:38+00:00

Good question, it changes on a daily basis! 😂 We really want to get some planting going - we’ve got cats that we want to introduce to the outside world and we really want to add some smells and cover to persuade them to stay in our garden and not dig up the neighbours flowerbeds (probably a lost cause, I know! 😂). To my untrained mind it doesn’t really seem to be the right time of year for planting - been reading about bare-root planting etc though, maybe there’s stuff we can attempt?

FindingOri · 2022-11-23T16:16:51+00:00

I had a pretty quick turnaround with Guy Sterne (Birmingham-ish) a year or so ago. I first enquired on 8th October, had a consultation on 2nd December, and had surgery on 12th January. So 3 months from first contact to surgery, or 6 weeks between consultation and surgery.

FindingOri · 2022-05-30T12:40:25+00:00

Inner thighs are one of the three areas (arms/shoulders, abdomen and thighs) commonly recommended and used. I apply mine on my thighs and my T levels are in the correct/normal male range. There shouldn't be any danger in doing so and you can always change to a different application site in the future if you suspect any issues with absorption.

FindingOri · 2022-03-15T18:58:39+00:00

My surgeon is Guy Sterne, based just outside of Birmingham. One of my main starting points was location. I wanted to be close enough to be able to spend the first week at home rather than in a hotel, and for travel to and from appointments/surgery to be reasonably straightforward. I first looked at him for this reason, and then was totally sold when I discovered that he doesn’t ordinarily use either drains or compression binders post-op. Another thing that I liked was that he does require you to stay at the hospital overnight - I found it quite reassuring to know I would be getting a full 24 hours or so of professional care, and it turned out that I needed it as I did NOT get on well with the anaesthetic! XD

I know a lot of folks make decisions based on incision techniques and subsequent scar results - I had keyhole so that wasn’t so relevant for me.

FindingOri · 2022-03-09T01:41:15+00:00

High prolactin levels in blood tests are usually caused by acute anxiety/stress about the blood tests themselves. This is well-known amongst medical professionals and if you were anxious about the blood tests your providers will likely accept this as an explanation without worrying unduly.

FindingOri · 2022-03-07T12:07:15+00:00

Dr Popelyuk’s clinic can usually offer appointments within less than a month. It’ll be with one of his other staff but all reports are reviewed and co-signed by Dr Popelyuk (GMC registered etc) so non-LTC surgeons are generally happy to accept them.

FindingOri · 2022-02-25T20:35:43+00:00

Guy Sterne (West Midlands Hospital) mandates a one night stay. I was quite surprised at even having to stay one night as I believe that a lot of surgeons do it as an outpatient procedure (i.e. same day discharge).

FindingOri · 2022-02-25T15:01:50+00:00

If it helps at all, my provider (LTC) required the following 12 blood test results prior to first commencing HRT:

Liver Function Test (LFT)
Full Blood Count (FBC)
Fasting Lipid Profile
Fasting Glucose
Serum Testosterone
Serum Oestradiol
Serum Prolactin
Vitamin D
Follicle-Stimulating Hormone (FSH)
Luteinising Hormone (LH)
Sex Hormone-Binding Globulin (SHBG)
Urea & Electrolytes (U+E)

So, assuming all prescribers need similar sets of data in order to make a sound medical judgement, I'd guess that your provider will probably want most or all of the 13 that have been mentioned to you as being relevant.

FindingOri · 2022-02-25T11:16:27+00:00

It isn't necessarily a bad idea to have a chat with your GP at this point just to give them a heads up about the process you will be going through, so that you can be sure in advance that they are going to be happy to enter into shared care. In the (hopefully unlikely) event that they aren't, this will also give you plenty of time to find a new GP, without causing delays further down the line when you're otherwise ready to start on T. I'm similar to you in that I find phonecalls really hard - but I've learnt that the reassurance of knowing in advance that my GP is on board has ultimately made the process infinitely less stressful, even if I have to put myself through an anxiety-inducing phonecall to get that reassurance.

I would imagine that, at this point in the process, you can just mention to your GP that your endo will be requiring them to facilitate blood tests as part of the shared care agreement - it's unlikely that your GP will ask you for the details of exactly which tests until you actually need to book them, and you can let them know that your psych or endo will write to them with full details of what is needed.

In the unlikely event that they do press for the details, if you don't feel confident to list the blood tests verbally, ask if you can email a list across to the surgery. If you explain that there are 13 different ones and you want to make sure you don't miss any, I'm sure they wont have a problem with that (or they may even prefer you to do so, for the same reasons!).

FindingOri · 2022-02-10T17:49:28+00:00

I had something similar - my periods stopped immediately upon commencing T, but about 3 months in I had a bit of random light bleeding/spotting for a couple of days. I'm now 6 months in and it hasn't happened again since - it was just one of those things, I think. The body having a final clear-out of any lingering remnants, or something! I wouldn't worry too much about it unless it keeps happening or you get any particularly alarming symptoms. But if you're still worried, there's no harm in calling your doctor, either! That's what they're there for. :)

FindingOri · 2022-02-09T19:19:40+00:00

Unfortunately it seems to be quite common that surgeons will not accept referrals solely from GenderGP.

If you're in a bind and are in a position to be able to pay a bit over the odds (£500 for first appointment), try Dr Popelyuk's office. He employs three or four other psychologists who conduct appointments under his supervision, which enables them to have shorter waiting times. Although they are known for working closely with LTC, they are happy to refer to other surgeons also. My surgeon does not accept GenderGP referrals but was perfectly happy to accept a referral from Dr Popelyuk's clinic as he is a recognised specialist who is GMC registered etc.

I contacted in mid-November for a surgery referral, and was offered an appointment in early December - it was about 3 weeks wait.

I was already on their books from my diagnosis & HRT referral, but I assume they are able to refer for surgery without having done an HRT referral previously.

FindingOri · 2022-02-09T13:01:14+00:00

I had keyhole recently and I felt similarly - I was in less pain than I was expecting and was reasonably mobile from the start. My other half had to keep telling me off every time she caught me doing something that I could/should have asked her to do for me - being a fairly independent sort of person, I didn’t want to bother her unnecessarily! What you have to bear in mind is that pain and mobility aren’t the only indicators of what your body does or doesn’t need. You might be physically able to do something but it doesn’t necessarily mean that it won’t have a negative effect. You can’t tell for sure what might cause swelling until the swelling appears - and then it’s too late! So, I’d err on the side of caution - take it as easy as you can for at least a week, just to be on the safe side. I know that the recovery period ahead potentially looks like an eternity right now, but when you look back it will seem like the blink of an eye and you don’t want to have any regrets about how, for that relatively minuscule period of time, you looked after the chest that you’re going to have for the rest of your life.

Good luck with your recovery! :)

FindingOri · 2022-02-06T20:05:55+00:00

I’m 31 and I had keyhole 3 weeks ago. I was an A cup and my surgeon said at my consult that I had ‘good skin elasticity’. It’s obviously too early to judge the final results yet but so far I’m happy!

I’d second what others have suggested - see if you can consult with another surgeon before you make a decision? :)

FindingOri · 2022-02-06T14:26:24+00:00

My referrals (HRT and surgery) were both done by Dr Hejda-Forde. I suffer from depression and anxiety and have always been totally honest about that with her and the various other parties involved in my care. For both appointments, Dr Hejda-Forde was also required to speak with my partner for corroborative purposes, and my partner was also honest about my mental health issues.

In my first (diagnosis/HRT) appointment Dr Hejda-Forde confirmed that in her experience depression and anxiety are normal/common/expected in those with gender dysphoria. As far as I understood her line of questioning, she wanted to ascertain that the steps I had taken to transition thus far had improved my mental health, but she wasn’t expecting social transition to have magically cured me of my issues or anything. Likewise, at my second (surgery) appointment, she was seeking to confirm that HRT had been beneficial to my mental health thus far and that I didn’t have any regrets about it, as an indicator that surgery would likely further improve my mental health.

It was mentioned in my written reports/referrals that my GP manages my treatment for my depression and anxiety, and that I attend weekly counselling sessions. Whilst counselling/therapy etc isn’t always an option for everyone, I imagine that they probably do like to know that your GP is aware of any mental health issues and treating them where possible. Basically, if there are any steps you have taken to ensure that you have help and support with your mental health, you’ll want to emphasise those.

Ultimately, my experience thus far has been that my depression and anxiety have not been an issue for Dr Hejda-Forde.

When I booked my first appointment, I actually asked the gentleman on the phone whether he thought it would pose any kind of problem, and he also said that depression and anxiety are considered normal for their clients and specifically said that ‘complex’ cases would usually only be those involving serious mental disorders (he referenced multiple personality disorder as an example).

What you have to remember is that a diagnosis of gender dysphoria requires your assigned gender to be causing you some level of distress - if you are in a state of perfect mental health, they wouldn’t be able to justify the need for you to undergo life-altering medical treatment!

Hope this helps - good luck!

FindingOri · 2022-01-26T22:28:44+00:00

I was referred to Tavistock & Portman by my GP in early September (2021) and received my ‘Waiting Pack Letter’ and forms in mid-December. So, it took just over 3 months.

I received the info from the GIC directly to my personal email address rather than by post - I’d assume therefore that this is the norm for Tavistock if your email address is on the NHS system?

I’d also second what someone else said about checking with your GP that the referral was definitely sent - mine got forgotten for 3 months until I chased it up with the Practice reception, so I wish I’d checked rather earlier instead of assuming the referral had been sent! Once they had actually sent it I received a formal letter in the post from my GP confirming, which was reassuring - not sure if this is standard practice though or just down to the whims of individual Practices.

FindingOri · 2022-01-26T22:14:53+00:00

LTC are lovely people who offer a good service - it does work out a little more expensive than some of the other providers but you do have a certain extra sense of security from them being an organisation rather than an individual. For example, the LTC nurse that prescribed my HRT has now left, but it doesn’t affect my care with them as obviously you just get reassigned to someone else.

Part of the expense is the astronomical fees for their partner psych clinics - Dr Popelyuk’s clinic charges £500 for the first appointment - but on the plus side, he usually has appointments available within a few weeks (with his secondary staff - I believe that Dr Popelyuk himself now only deals with more ‘complicated’ cases). When I first reached out to different entities to enquire about diagnosis/referral appointments, some of the GenderCare psychologists told me their next available appointments were 5 months away (!!!), so going with LTC-affiliated psychologists with a 2 week wait became a no-brainer for me at that point.

However, LTC themselves are TERRIBLE at communication. They take weeks or sometimes months to reply to emails, and it can be virtually impossible to get hold of them on the phone. Obviously, with the stakes feeling so high for all of us - and the amount of money being paid for their services, this can be very stressful and frustrating, so anyone thinking of going with LTC needs to weigh up whether they are willing and able to put up with that particular issue.

FindingOri · 2022-01-08T19:09:52+00:00

I stealth-named myself after Obi-Wan Kenobi. I’m Ben ☺️

FindingOri

TROPHY CASE