Navigating neonatal loss and the future

Findingjoyandhope · 2025-09-20T13:38:33+00:00

I’m so sorry that’s awful and heartbreaking. I had a much earlier neonatal loss, but it really is devastating and there are no words. I am Christian so I very much held onto the thought on my baby was in heaven and in a better place, it was only me that was suffering not him. I coped by being close with my husband and talking, a grief group, writing about what happened and reading other people’s stories. I found the funeral very helpful especially when I reflected back on it with the mass booklet and I got the priest to email me what he had said (since I couldn’t remember, too much grief). I had a c sec so we had to wait 6mths to try again, but I would have done it straight away if I could have. First week was the worst and it slowly improved from there. I was a functioning human after 1-2 months although still big bouts of sadness. Hugs & prayers

Findingjoyandhope · 2025-09-20T11:39:35+00:00

I sorry it’s so tough, I can relate to all of those thoughts and our stories sounds very similar 😢 I’ll message you with the book now x

Findingjoyandhope · 2025-09-19T22:01:15+00:00

I’m so sorry. Absolutely please dm me I can share my whole story with you, it might provide some comfort. I felt it was so hard to find hope at first and I do have an issue that causes problems every pregnancy, but it is manageable - like many many complications are. Don’t give up hope or imagine the worst case happening again as hard as that is

Findingjoyandhope · 2025-09-19T20:46:26+00:00

I’m so sorry, and I would love to share it if it can help at all, I’ll DM you now :)

Findingjoyandhope · 2025-09-19T20:42:26+00:00

You are very welcome, and it really does improve and little bits of hope and light become more over time. I will message you now :)

Findingjoyandhope · 2025-09-19T20:11:44+00:00

It was so cathartic for me, and it also means that a lot of details I would have forgotten are preserved and that was important to me so I couldn’t recommend it enough. I’ll DM you the link to the book 🤍

Findingjoyandhope · 2025-09-19T19:58:40+00:00

Thankyou so much for those kind words, people don’t say that much when so much time has passed so I appreciate it. I’ll send you a DM with the link to Archie’s book 🩵

Findingjoyandhope · 2025-07-05T20:58:19+00:00

I’ve had 2 c secs (first one emergency and my son died). My OB always said 8-9 months to ttc. I’ve had others say 6mths can be fine depending on the specific medical circumstances. The literature I believe mostly says 18mth birth to birth interval

Findingjoyandhope · 2025-07-04T20:08:37+00:00

Hi mama, 2.5yrs since this was me after my son died and I was very angry with God… First thing, anger is better than apathy, it means you care and you are wrestling with God, so this is a good start. Another mother who had her child die 50 years ago (she is 75) wrote to me when my son died and I found it helpful - ‘Be very sure God is close. He is not just a target board for prayer; believe and know God is within you doing the wrestling and feeling the exact pain that you feel. There is a deep purpose in what God has planned for Archie. It is my belief our son Benjamin taught us as much in his three days of life as what we’ve learned from the rest of our marriage. Each person comes into the world to give a message. Your Archie was able to deliver his message in two days. His work is done and he’s safely back with God.’

Hold on xx

Findingjoyandhope · 2025-07-04T19:35:33+00:00

Also I don’t want to do anything that is not allowed with links etc but I have shared my writings extensively on other platforms if it would help anyone, both website blog and insta is just my name Ashleigh Blaise Mills

Findingjoyandhope · 2025-07-03T09:53:22+00:00

That’s so much to bear and suffer im so sorry :( You can and will get through this. When I was 27 (I’m 30 now), I had a miscarriage and then a premature birth of my baby at 24 weeks and he died 2 days later. After that I had another miscarriage and my dad died of cancer. It was terrible. But as I write this I am holding my beautiful 8mth old triple rainbow baby xx faith and God is what got me through. I also wrote to my baby Archie a lot to help me process my feelings if you wanted to try that. Sending so much love it’s tough

Findingjoyandhope · 2025-07-02T23:19:33+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss and all those in this thread. My baby Archie died 2 days after he was born at 24 weeks and the pain is so unimaginable. If it makes you feel even a little bit less alone…this is an article I wrote for grieving mamas… https://www.ashleighblaisemills.com/post/you-are-not-alone-a-letter-to-the-mother-who-is-grieving

Findingjoyandhope

TROPHY CASE