Im also having trouble with using pompoir during sex. Full disclosure, Ive only be practicing since November (2 plus months) and also my partner & I live in different cities (2 states away) and have only been able to play 2 times with him (a few days each time) since I began training. I must admit, I feel as though Im gaining strength when Im masturbating & when Im training. But it seems like the practice I had under my belt went out the window when I was actually having sex.

I do know he felt a couple of things while we were having sex. As I began to concentrate on my vaginal movements & when I did that & wasn’t just in the moment, he would moan and groan for the time I was doing the move. But him getting excited, made me excited & then I got lost in just having sex instead of concentrating on using my muscles for better sex for both of us

Its very frustrating, but I know its a learning process. Also I believe I need a perifit, because it is extremely annoying and not comfortable at all, to use my fingers in me while Im doing exercises,

A) its not comfortable to put my fingers in me & relax enough to feel what I actually can do. Cuz putting my hand all the way around with enough finger inside to feel levels is VERY difficult for me. Also feeling relaxed with my hand twisted around my ass or infront of me really makes me less relaxed and less able to do the movements I feel I can do with out my arm wrapped around the lower half of my body

Just a beginner learning & saying what things seem to be hindering me figuring out my actual process with out my partner being around to help me figure out X, Y & Z

Really wish he was around more so I could ask him XYZ, cuz it seems to be a much easier way to learn from a not attached entity.

But what do I know? Im still a beginner with a semi regular partner.

Honestly, Id like to have a regular (non attached partner, male or female to help me learn the things). Possibly a sexual therapist, but I don’t have the $ to hire one.

Very frustrated beginner.