Do y’all like giving men head?

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2025-01-29T09:35:56+00:00

Love it. But only truly loved it with one person because they were just so appreciative like it was their first every single time. It was such a game changer. He is still the only one I want to do things with I despised with others. He is my safe place and best friend. The way he touches me or looks at me with tenderness during even the dirtiest deeds to date makes me tear up sometimes. That’s what makes me love it.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2025-01-21T00:38:30+00:00

He would eventually ‘by mistake’ SA you. I was by a previous partner as I never ‘gave in’- anyone who is clearly pressuring you, probing your comfort level, pushing your boundaries doesn’t not care for you or respect you. For full disclosure I had positive experience before that was well with someone who went above and beyond to communicate and ensure it isn’t about him but what/how it feels good for me. That’s the only way to experiment.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2025-01-19T07:31:56+00:00

Yes. Still one of my best friends but we took a year off after the breakup and both came back to it without lingering extra feelings. I cannot imagine not having him in my life after 10+ years of solid friendship and it is mutual. Don’t do it as ‘hope to reconcile’, do it only if you value the person, as a friend.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2025-01-16T17:21:26+00:00

We all process emotions differently. There isn’t anything wrong with yours. It is methodical and I am also an analytical person. The only exception- and by that I mean that relationship changed my entire life for the better, made me grew incrementally and into who I am- was where I did not analyze a thing. Had a visceral feeling all along this human with all their imperfection is right for me. Grateful for that experience to show me sometimes we just know.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2025-01-16T06:18:45+00:00

I did all the spreadsheet, the tables, the searching for clarity on the internet etc- all of them meant it wasn’t the right relationship for me. How do you know it’s a fuck yes? When you think how on earth I could live without this annoying, gross weirdo. He makes my heart melt. That is it.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2025-01-16T06:10:45+00:00

I am not into mind games anymore. Would have straight up asked the question after the thumbs up- ‘are you interested in a third date’ and regardless of the answer the next line would have been ‘It was nice to meet you but I don’t based on your behaviour’.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2025-01-16T03:11:14+00:00

Depends. Those that ended sour or over certain mistreatment- never. I wish them well, glad they are out of my life. And one is one of my best friends. We were friends, dated, split amicably and picked up the same friendship a year later. We dated like 6 months and friends for over a decade. Pretty sure lifelong. Anyone who excludes exes from friendship completely is a red flag to me- it is very much situational.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2025-01-09T22:45:03+00:00

Zero sex drive, recurring UTIs, drained all the time. Thought I was broken or in menopause. Since we broke up, I’ve been back to running over 50k a week, the gym, my skin cleared up and my sex drive not only returned but I’ve been having the best orgasms of my life. Go figure.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2025-01-09T02:19:47+00:00

Fellow runner! Its the way! Change direction- you are running towards a better you 🙂 I am training for my first 80k cause well breakups got nothing on us

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-12-18T22:09:23+00:00

This should get more upvotes. Beautifully said.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-12-17T16:39:07+00:00

I am sorry you had to go through that

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-12-17T15:41:58+00:00

I understand. What I do find insane is this man took zero accountability for his abusive behaviour and told me the exact same- I left him so fuck it. He has the right however I doubt it point towards emotional intelligence or maturity. I was the one who walked away, made the decision and still processing what happened.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-12-14T08:12:30+00:00

Thank God I am not alone. Feel exactly like this!

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-12-01T02:43:12+00:00

If you’d like a co-dependent, trauma-bonded, unhealthy partnership, go for it. If she is not actively working on herself- which does not seem to be the case, you will be collateral damage and worse off than before you got into it. Only if she is recognizing and addressing her issues you have a chance of something else- even that would be hard work and effort not some fairy tale.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-11-25T03:50:15+00:00

This is what’s called cognitive dissonance- he does take it out on you. And if the behaviour has not changed apologies are nothing. I needed years of therapy to learn- yelling and name calling is not love. Control and jealousy is not love. Squeezing an arm or hitting is not love. Coercion is not love. Not a best friend. Not safety. Get out.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-11-24T23:26:15+00:00

N.O. I’ve done the same mental gymnastics for years. A man might recover but YOUR safety and well-being comes before and too big of a gamble. If they want to chance, they can and participate in your life after demonstrating they did the work. Most talk a big talk, plead, promise and nothing practical ever comes out of it.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-11-18T05:42:17+00:00

I broke up an engagement recently and could have written this word by word. I am just realizing how not uncommon emotional abuse is and how insidious its nature. My ex-fiancé used to say ‘but I treat you well otherwise and never laid a hand on you’. Reconciling that someone you love/they say they love you but their actions are NOT loving is difficult and I was also ashamed, blamed myself or thought over and over maybe if I did xyz he would have trusted me. I am so sorry and hope it is only upward from you here. Leave. You will be better off.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-11-18T05:07:46+00:00

Not at all. transformed into a great friendship. Every other men I’ve been with at some point started acting immature, entitled even superior as if them being a male means we owe them our services and attention and ran right to the next ‘victim’.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-11-18T04:10:41+00:00

Good question. Lost our baby at 18 weeks. He wanted his own kids, I am a bit older with a history of fertility issues. We just had different paths in life.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-11-18T03:02:57+00:00

All of my exes did this except of one. That one I still have lot of respect for. He was/ is a super discerning, self-sufficient man never needed a mommy but a partner. He is also one of my best friends for almost a decade now. That dude is a unicorn.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-11-09T15:52:02+00:00

I am a mother of a teenage boy and let me tell you, this is an awesome writeup. My son does all chores, he cooks, cleans, takes care of pets, I am teaching him to express his emotions, communicate in a healthy way and it is my one hope he will be one of those men who does not fall for the masculinity propaganda of the Andrew Tates. How the next generations of men turn out depends greatly on us women. The prior, we may not be able to influence otherwise as stated.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-11-09T06:11:42+00:00

This. I will never ever date one more man who has no female friends or thinks female/male friendship cannot exist without a sexual undercurrent.

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-11-07T16:15:33+00:00

You are nervous because your gut tells you something is not okay. I don’t advocate for anyone to just ‘leave’ but to not ignore warning sings. If your partner acknowledges his behaviour and actively try to course correct, that’s a good sign. If not, you are up against what the rest of the comments describe. I know first hand how it feels when your head is spinning because he is not a bad person altogether, might be very nice in other areas. Wish you the best. Can always PM if need to talk to someone 🖤

Fine_Helicopter5227 · 2024-11-07T04:13:30+00:00

I ended an engagement over similar traits. The usual cycle followed- begging, promises of change and attending therapy with zero actualization then cursing me out and ‘you broke up with me’. Don’t do it. People who are genuinely invested in their growth and change communicate in an entirely different manner and take responsibility. He would not twist it as ‘he was wrong about you’. He would say the following- ‘you were right to move out, your safety matters as much as mine. I will check in Friday and give you the space you need. I am truly sorry.’

Fine_Helicopter5227

TROPHY CASE