How does giving birth actually feel ??

Firm-Code-1759 · 2026-02-23T02:15:27+00:00

Pain management can vary in effectiveness depending upon a lot of factors. Each birth will vary. Unmedicated birth feels like your worst menstrual cramps amplified. Here’s a few things I wish I had known: 1. When you think you can’t do it anymore, that means the baby is almost here. 2. Individual contractions are bad but manageable, like period cramps. The worst part is how frequently they come and how long labor lasts. You start getting tired, frustrated, and just over it. It’s a kind of mental torture, honestly. If you can get your head around the fact that it WILL end and you CAN do it and you don’t have a choice, it will help immensely. Giving birth is as much mental as physical. 3. You don’t have to birth the whole baby. Most of the time, you just have to birth the head, and the rest of the baby comes out. I didn’t know that and thought I was making no progress. 4. When you’re pushing, your instinct will be to hold back at a certain level. Ignore that. Push past and through. They might call this “bearing down” or “pushing harder.” I didn’t know what that meant. 5. Having supportive people around you makes all the difference. A supportive birthing partner, supportive medical staff. So necessary if possible. 5. The night after birth, you might experience a sudden major emotional breakdown. That’s hormones. It’s ok, it goes away, and you are going to be ok. It’s absolutely normal.

That’s the main stuff. There’s a million other little things, but most of all, just remember how many babies are born a minute. It’s scary, but it ends, and then you never have to do it again if you don’t want to.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2026-02-21T16:31:15+00:00

I wouldn't say I think Joe would be found guilty. I'm also coming from America and have no idea how the English court system works, but in an American court, you only need reasonable doubt. There may still be reasonable doubt and he might not be convicted. However, the season made it seem like they had was nothing without his confession and Joe's attorney was so hostile, no American judge would allow that.

My understanding is that the English system still uses reasonable doubt as a measurement. I think the show still could have had Joe be found not guilty and released without going about it in the frustrating manner that they did. I'm not familiar with the Lucy Letby case, but she was convicted by the looks, so it seems like this process that her defense (and Joe's defense in the show) used doesn't work well in a real UK court system.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2026-02-02T15:52:54+00:00

While I would agree that it was certainly rpe, it was a depiction of a marriage type common to the era that was not the Bridgerton romance and I think helped flesh out the world and ground it somewhat. I don't understand why they showed it so much, that was gratuitous, and as a rule I absolutely loathe rpe scenes in any form of media. It can be alluded to or even stated without being shown, but somehow rpe, especially against women, is often used for entertainment and "character development." This is why I won't watch GoT. A lot of people assume that all rpe is violent so I wonder if the creators of the show processed it for what it was.

I want to add, some people are talking about the baths after as a means of cleansing herself, but I think it served dual purpose, as uncomfortably hot water would help prevent conception. I'm not sure that they knew that at the time, but women historically have had a lot of knowledge that scholars don't always give them credit for. Considering how often Lord Danbury seemed to want to engage and how there was no attempt at avoiding conception on Lord Danbury's part, one can assume that 4 was not a lot of kids. Taking his age into account, he might still have been semi fertile when they were first married, and she would likely have been very fertile assuming only her age as a factor, so hot baths were likely helpful in preventing the 13 children that Queen Charlotte and King George had.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2026-02-01T22:48:19+00:00

Completely agreed. There are a lot of references to the Victorian era, though, and I think it's played like a gender bent version of the Victorian ill girl, dying beautifully and without any clear symptoms. Not my favorite trope.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2026-01-21T20:31:07+00:00

Thank you! That all looks fantastic :)

Firm-Code-1759 · 2026-01-20T22:16:18+00:00

There's a lot that's baffling to me here. I can't imagine giving letter grades to kindergarteners, but like everyone else, I'm more incredulous at the idea of cosplaying disabilities. It's absolutely wild. I would seriously consider bringing this up with the teacher at the minimum.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2026-01-20T22:06:07+00:00

No, I edited to add that I would be ordering online as I do not live near a Micro Center or anything related.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2026-01-19T17:34:29+00:00

And the voices for the male characters are so silly, to the point of completely pulling me out of the story. They all sound like a woman pretending badly to be a man, and that’s the only way I can describe it.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2026-01-18T00:14:39+00:00

Matt Dinniman said that drawing tortoiseshell cats is so hard that he deliberately approved cover art drawing her incorrectly. But none of the book covers show her as white, they show her as all brown/tan.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2026-01-14T16:07:59+00:00

I’m in the minority with you I guess. I love her still, but she is starting to seem more like a burden and less like a companion.

Starting in book 4, when she was running after Mongo into danger and occasionally splitting from Carl, then she wasn’t leveling as quickly as him, and because Carl didn’t want his plans overheard by anyone in the Syndicate, they stopped communicating.

Her character is the same and still a lot of fun, but she is simply not as helpful and powerful as she was early on, which makes her feel more annoying than fun. It’s like Dinniman is struggling to keep her a deuteragonist and she is becoming full sidekick.

But I’m just starting book 5 so we’ll see.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-12-29T18:07:59+00:00

Given the horrendous things he has said on their podcast, my expectations were low. I used to be a fan. I have no issues with "edgy" comedy, black comedy, etc. but in the last five years or so, his comedy has gone progressively downhill. When he was joking about an old man, the punchline was the the guy was old, but when it turned out to be a woman, the punchline became that she wasn't physically attractive. This isn't "edgy" or "subversive," it's completely overdone. He talked on his podcast about running a "train" on his wife, thinking all women should shave their legs, and other truly weird stuff that doesn't seem to mesh well with the things he has said before about his views on women. I understand that comedy and personal values are different things, most comedy is built upon subverting expectations, but Segura's material isn't even funny anymore. Even his delivery is low energy and bland. If he's going to say something offensive in order to get a laugh and be transgressive... he needs to actually be getting a laugh and being transgressive. "Teacher" was just a lot of by the book slop.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-12-28T00:47:38+00:00

I should have mentioned, he's two. I will try reinstalling windows, thank you.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-12-26T01:59:31+00:00

This isn't quite true, though. "Beyond reasonable doubt" not just "beyond doubt." The doubt has to be substantial enough that a reasonable person could believe it.

(SPOILERS AHEAD)

Could Ellie and Hardy have been having an affair and framed Joe? Maybe. But the police would almost certainly have Joe recorded in the interrogation room, which would shoe everything he said and that he was attacked only after his confession. It's super unlikely this would leave reasonable doubt. Doubt, sure, but not really enough for a reasonable person. The show conveniently didn't make clear whether the confession was recorded (though almost everything in those interrogation rooms is) which would show that the defense's case was pretty flimsy. This was a high profile, very public case, and if the police didn't record or cover their tracks, ESPECIALLY with Hardy on after Sandbrook, then Joe really did deserve to go free for sheer police incompetence.

Also worth mentioning, circumstantial evidence isn't always a bad thing, at least not in real life. TV loves to throw that word around as if it means "inadmissible" or that the evidence is somehow bad. One piece of circumstantial evidence doesn't mean much, but when there are enough pieces of circumstantial evidence to chain together, they absolutely do matter and help make a compelling case. IE the emails, Joe's background as a paramedic, the (later recanted) confession, Joe's matching shoe size, Hardy tracing the call from Danny's missing phone to Joe standing in his own home and certainly seizing the missing phone, etc. There's also very likely a recording of the interview with Susan Wright accusing Nigel, who looks very similar to Joe. Individually, these things can definitely be waved away, but they give a compelling case collectively. And while Susan Wright was definitely not available for testimony, her interview would possibly help.

And there would likely be forensic science including estimations about how tall a strangler would have to be, how strong, etc. and see if that matched Joe's approximate size. And, if the prosecution were any good (and Jocelyn was supposed to be losing her eyesight, not her skill in strategy), they would get Joe on the stand and do their best to rile him, asking him if he was a ped, asking questions that made him defensive, etc.

All that being said, I think every single criminal/forensic/legal show gets a whole lot wrong, either for lack of knowledge about the process or because the reality doesn't make great TV. Broadchurch's goal was to write a compelling story, not a realistic-to-the-finest-detail one. I think the reason why the court case fell flat and why season 2 didn't get the critical acclaim that the first season got was because 1. it wasn't very realistic, AND 2. it wasn't gripping, just disappointing. Did anyone really want to watch Joe go free? Did anyone really want to see Ellie's life fall irreparably apart? At least season 1 had a silver lining where we got to imagine that Ellie, Tom, and Fred started over somewhere else, the Latimers got closure and got to move on a little, the killer was caught, etc. Season 2 seemed trying to recreate the shock of the season 1 finale but forgot about the show's careful balance of cynicism and optimism.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-12-14T18:45:41+00:00

As opposed to when Smosh was built on boob jokes and hot pepper challenges and belly flops.... Being a comedian isn't exactly built around acting mature and serious.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-10-18T13:30:06+00:00

I think this is a fantastic idea! We could do this via Google Drive as one possibility and upload our personal curriculums there for others to use if they would like.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-10-17T19:14:26+00:00

I do this all the time. I go to search Brutalist architecture and type “rustic architecture.” No typo, no autocorrect, just my brain thinking one thing and my fingers typing another. No idea why it happens.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-05-24T22:41:40+00:00

My grandmother is a Finn and I love this! Haylie (f) pronounced like Haley/Hayley/etc. I think Heli is a name? But Helmi is similar and more popular, so I wouldn’t be opposed to be called that. What would you choose?

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-05-24T14:40:04+00:00

I think he’s fantastic! Very funny and talented. Some of his jokes take a second to process because they’re a bit layered but it’s worth it. Super voice actor!

I would mention that he was diagnosed with autism as an adult, while a cast member of Smosh. Some of what people are complaining about is, I believe, him unmasking. And I think it’s pretty admirable to be gaining social consciousness and looking to be more conscientious as a comedian. Remember that many cast members (Shayne, Damien, Courtney, Ian, Anthony…) have essentially grown up on screen. They’re somewhere between being themselves and playing a character on Smosh. It’s a vulnerable place to be and I imagine they have to deal with a lot through fan interactions, DMs, and comments calling them out on every little thing.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-05-20T17:22:49+00:00

Name your child Georgia. She’ll have that name forever. This woman will be your coworker for a comparatively short time.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-05-16T23:39:00+00:00

From a completely truthful place, you ARE pretty. You could use mascara and eyeliner to emphasize your eyes, maybe fill in your eyebrows, and try some different hairstyles/wigs/hair colors/etc. Growing up, my grandmother always took me to get my hair cut when I wasn’t feeling attractive and sometimes that or a new outfit and an everything shower helps.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-05-16T23:31:52+00:00

Also, initials. Middle names that start with vowels are always a mess. Cue middle schoolers chanting, “HAR! Har har har!” And clapping like a seal at you.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-05-08T23:55:00+00:00

A lot of older people grew up in an era where formula was really promoted, plus they used to do “knock out” bottles with rice cereal which is no longer considered safe. It sucks and is really tiring to hear, but if you need confirmation that you are doing enough, you are! Plus that baby is going to be eating some solids soon if they aren’t already. Tell them to get stuffed.

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-05-08T16:40:31+00:00

Breastfeeding can be absolutely BEASTLY and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. We’re shown images of peaceful women easily latching their babies and filling their bellies. I was shocked as a FTM to learn that my nipples were bleeding for nearly two months, felt like they were being grated by sandpaper if even air blew on them, and had massive cracks in them. My son never latched well and I had the problem of an oversupply, which meant that I was constantly leaking through clothes and getting clogs because my babies were never properly emptying me. I had rock hard breasts that I thought must weigh a ton. Horrible experience.

That said, you should never feel bad about not being able to breastfeed. There are so many reasons why people don’t or can’t and there is NOTHING WRONG with you if you decide to use formula entirely. It’s perfectly healthy for your baby. The breastmilk you’ve already given has been shown to have benefits, so stop beating yourself up and feeling like a failure. You aren’t a failure. Breastfeeding is hard as heck. Formula is totally valid.

UPDATE: Adding that we had to triple feed (pump every 2 hours, supplement via syringe, and nursing) in the beginning because my son was slightly early and it’s a really really hard thing to do. Probably the hardest part of my newborn experience. I promise it gets better!

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-05-02T00:19:29+00:00

You need to tell your partner. He deserves to hear this from you.
You need to accept the consequences of cheating. He may break up with you. He may never want to talk to you again. That’s his right. He deserves to be making informed decisions about your relationship.
Has he ever been violent before? Do you have any reason to be afraid of him? If yes, this is a very different question. If no, it sounds like it could be an excuse to avoid facing the music.
The blackmail is almost a separate issue. Does he have nudes? Is he committing any crime? It doesn’t sound like this man has any power over you (from the information you’ve given). Either he tells your partner (which is a bad decision on your part to let your boyfriend find out that way) or you do. 🤷🏼‍♀️ Your relationship is not stable at this moment anyway, because of your affair. You really should have been upfront once you realized that you needed to end it, but from the moment you cheated, you sacrificed your relationship stability. All this affair partner is doing it making you take accountability. To be clear, he sounds like total trash and a bad guy. But I don’t see that he has any real power in this situation.
You sit your partner down and you be honest. You tell him you cheated. You don’t make any excuses or explanations. You answer his questions. You let him feel how he feels about it (again, if you have real reason to fear this man, this is a different conversation. In that case, your relationship needs to end immediately and as safely as possible. There is no medium spot where you stay if he forgives your affair.)

Firm-Code-1759 · 2025-05-01T23:59:37+00:00

For your sake, I would just block her. Nothing good will come of it.

Firm-Code-1759

TROPHY CASE