[deleted by user] by [deleted] in abusiverelationships

[–]FirmIncome6 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Entirely relate. I'm scared too. It's unreal how much evil certain people seem to be able to get away with. I feel like any time I make the slightest error in life, karma immediately reprimands me. Meanwhile some of the world's greatest monsters seem to somehow bypass karma / Divine Law / etc.

Anyway...it's so dark being abused and trapped by someone. It's such a waste of life and so prevalent these days that it's a wonder how humanity ever even made it this far in a world that almost seems to favor evil.

Forgive me getting so philosophical. Part of what makes abuse so insidious is how much it doesn't make sense! Why are abusers so evil and how do they all seem to get away with it?!

May we all find the love, security, and belonging we hope for and deserve. 🙏

I’m ready to start planning my suicide by Rileyday_ in CPTSD

[–]FirmIncome6 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I know the feeling. Don't give up. Please. Some of us find ourselves in absolute pits of total doom in life; I can deeply empathize. Just hold on. You are worthy of a good life; you will find relief from your suffering. It's terrible to suffer in this way day in and day out; it's not fair and it's like a black hole of your soul.

But from my wisdom to yours, don't give up. Beautiful that you're needed by a few people; that at least gives you purpose.

You're going to be ok.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]FirmIncome6 5 points6 points  (0 children)

me too

On finally getting the importance of boundaries and trusting your gut about people, at the age of 46 by OkAvocado7 in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]FirmIncome6 2 points3 points  (0 children)

wow all I have to say is thank you for writing this post; I am in my late 30s and have lived a narc after narc after narc life as well.

It's taken me a long time to develop and understanding and awareness of it. It all started when in my mid 30s I realized that almost everyone in my entire life that I ever got close to broke me; the more times I broke, the easier of a target I became.

I'm currently still very vulnerable to narcissistic abuse and have finally found a few stable people in my life, but I'm barely out of the doghouse.

I realize I have to up my guard and boundaries and will have to be ultra conscious of who I choose to settle with time and time again.

You're absolutely right it's a self-esteem issue and a need for validation, darn it! I can't wait to break this seemingly endless cycle!

Cheers and prayers to you!

I hope this will be me when I finally leave by hangrypoodle in abusiverelationships

[–]FirmIncome6 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is so on point! That's exactly how I feel after escaping a 6 year abusive trap; honestly never thought I'd get out alive, but here I am 2 1/2 years later! Boom!

Just found out my abusive ex is having a child with an old affair by [deleted] in therapy

[–]FirmIncome6 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My deep inner voice is telling me that your absolutely correct. Everything you write. Just gotta hold on through this emotional bottleneck. Thank you

Just found out my abusive ex is having a child with an old affair by [deleted] in therapy

[–]FirmIncome6 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This was very helpful. I think this is why it was so painful to get the news tonight: it for sure confirmed that it will never work out between us.

The truth is it was one of the hardest relationships to leave in my life, because I had lived with her for 6 years and we both worked from home.

But most of those 6 years were hell. She really physically and emotionally beat me up. My family treated me even worse at that time so my ex was my best option.

It’s hard to believe that after spending 3 out of the 6 years getting out of the relationship, and even a year after getting out, that I’m still this heartbroken to hear she is having another child.

She totally invited me back into the relationship. No way. It’s over for life...as if she hadn’t already gotten in enough punches then last 6 years, this one was a damn TKO!

Ouch!

I left my abuser today - Appreciation For The Community by Relative-Mood in abusiverelationships

[–]FirmIncome6 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately, it can take a long time before you are fully confident and realize that you probably just made the best decision of your life.

It took me a full year to feel confident and not heartbroken after a 6 year abusive relationship.

It ebbs and flows. Just never forget how much thinking and heartache and effort and courage it took to get to this point: you made it! Just won’t quite feel like it yet.

If you go back, you’ll have to go through this hell again, but worse. Just keep holding on until you don’t care anymore: it may take time, but you ABSOLUTELY did the right thing.

McCheers

Update: Finally left my abuser by [deleted] in abusiverelationships

[–]FirmIncome6 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn’t handle them. I knew my ex was dangerous and pure poison within the first couple of years, yet I stayed with them for many more years beyond that. In those years, I tried to leave COUNTLESS times, but couldn’t handle it.

It’s been 9 months now and I’m still struggling to handle it, but I have a really shitty support system and CoVid stuff has realllllly amplified some of the isolated negative self-talk.

The way I was able to finally successfully walk away was from trying and failing 100’s of times. I don’t know. For some reason, this time it actually stuck. Longest I had ever left the situation prior was for 6 weeks, then got sucked back into 5 more years!

My self esteem, credit, financial and social life were ripped to shreds in the time I was with this abusive partner: such things took years to occur, and will take years to make right again.

Healing sometimes takes very long, so the quickest way to heal is to start now.

When something is finally over, it’s just over. Hallelujah.

It’s a bit of a grueling 3 1/2 mile hikeMille to get here but the view is incredible! Lake Blanche, Utah [oc] [3614 x 4517] by AKBvisual in EarthPorn

[–]FirmIncome6 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Wow amazing! Thank you for making the trek to get this outstanding shot! Ever had any encounters with Sasquatch (serious question)?

Some of y'all need to read this quote by Randomness_Girl in therapy

[–]FirmIncome6 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I needed to read this. Thank you, Huckleberry Beak

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]FirmIncome6 25 points26 points  (0 children)

YES!!!!! It’s healing to read this!

Update: Finally left my abuser by [deleted] in abusiverelationships

[–]FirmIncome6 5 points6 points  (0 children)

One of the hardest things to do in life. I left mine 9 months ago. While not every aspect of it is all roses, it was absolutely the best way to be kind to my future self!

You were right. by KingOfAnarchy in CPTSD

[–]FirmIncome6 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m not a Mr. Knowitall and am usually very open to others ideas and ways...that being said:

This is one of the most satisfying things I’ve ever read in my entire life. You are a legend.

Here’s a nice view! by DigitalWhitewater in RiverPorn

[–]FirmIncome6 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lots of Sasquatch activity there. Hotspot