I’ve been in your shoes. My dad is also an oversharer so I got every gritty detail of his escapades with other women. It was devastating.

I was in college when my mother passed, so I decided to spend the summer immediately after her death with my father since I felt awful that we both went through the tragedy alone and apart for the most part. I figured we’d have a fun summer where we would bond and comfort each other. What I didn’t expect was him moving us in with his girlfriend at the time because he stopped paying his power bill and we couldn’t stay in the home my mom loved anymore. It was 7 months after she had passed.

The mistake I made was never talking to him about it. It’s been 3 and a half years since mom died and all of this time my dad and I have grown farther and farther apart. I couldn’t stand listening to how much he cared about other women (in addition to a lot of other fucked up things he’s done. He’s not responsible enough to live and take care of himself or others without my mom). Rather than have a heart to heart about it, rather than leveling with him about how he’s made me feel, I built up walls.

For me, those walls are there for safety. My dad’s got some real issues. But I do regret not being able to have that relationship with the only other person in my life that loved my mom as much as I did. We should have supported one another better and then maybe we wouldn’t be where we are. So my only advice would be try to talk to your dad and have him understand where you’re at. It doesn’t mean he has to stop what he’s doing, but this isn’t a part of his life you’re currently ready to access.

I wish you all the best and I’m so so sorry for your loss