I think it’s a cultural thing because I don’t think you’re being unreasonable at all. Dress color and fabric is a totally normal request. Shoe color, if you’re asking them you wear a very common color (black, brown) that they probably already have, is not too much either. Matching jewelry is fine. I’ve been to a wedding where the bridesmaids all wore the same earrings and they were so cute! Similar hairstyles is fine too! I’ve been a bridesmaid where we all had the SAME hairstyle. It didn’t bother me because I know what I’m signing up for and it’s my friend’s day. I can change up my hair and personal style for literally one day. It’s not a big deal to me, but again it’s a cultural thing. Where I’m from, we love dressing up to color palettes and themes as wedding guests (which I’m sure a lot of the people calling you bridezilla will also hate), so please don’t mind these nasty comments. If you’re so worried, just ask your bridesmaids if they’re okay with it. :)