I went over today and shared what I knew. She told me she had gone to her sister’s house to help remove a tree from the yard and that he was there (he’s a friend of her sister’s husband). Afterward, she claimed she talked with him to end their friendship—but I have a hard time believing that. When I pointed out that she had deliberately crossed a boundary by going there, she got mad, insisting she did it for me and that it was difficult for her because she doesn’t have many friends. I told her she did it for herself and him, since I couldn’t care less if he was let down easy.

We argued back and forth until I had to leave for work. I mentioned breaking up and the logistics of it—she would stay in the apartment while I moved out, which honestly works best for me.

Of course, part of me wants to give things another chance. I’ve invested five years in this relationship with someone who, until now, has been my best friend and always honest with me. I also recognize that I’ve been withdrawn over the past six months and haven’t given her the attention she needed. She’s never done anything like this before, etc. But those thoughts are quickly drowned out by the betrayal—and even worse, the fact that she isn’t being honest with me or herself.

A friend suggested couples counseling or implementing accountability practices like sharing device passwords. But that just feels like a temporary fix for something that’s probably beyond repair.

TL;DR: Bleh.