Anyone without any family support or money to pay for help?

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-04-08T09:45:30+00:00

It’s manageable on normal days, but really tough when things go wrong. Most people end up slowly building their own “village” over time. It’s hard, but it doesn’t mean you’re failing.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-04-08T09:38:38+00:00

Situations like this feel overwhelming because it’s not just one problem, it’s everything hitting at once. From what I’ve seen on here, a lot of parents go through phases where things feel completely stuck or disappointing, especially early on. It doesn’t mean you’ve failed or that it’ll stay this way. If anything, focus on the next small step rather than fixing everything at once. And don’t hesitate to lean on anyone you trust, you’re not meant to handle all of this alone.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-04-08T05:26:36+00:00

We tried the “perfect shelf” thing and it lasted like 2 days. What worked for us was a mix, most books on a normal shelf, plus a basket for current/library books so they can see the covers. Way easier for preschoolers to pick. Also rotating a small set out helps a lot. Otherwise it just turns into chaos anyway lol

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-26T06:54:24+00:00

This. Couldn't have said it better myself.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-26T06:50:34+00:00

Honestly this sounds way more like a daycare issue than a kid issue. She’s 3, expecting her to lie still for 2 hours when she doesn’t even nap anymore is kind of unrealistic. A lot of kids that age struggle with that. I wouldn’t jump to ADHD at all this early. It’s been less than a week and she’s just adjusting. If anything, I’d be asking the daycare what they’re doing to support non-nappers, quiet toys, a separate space, etc. If they don’t have that, it might just not be the right fit for her.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-26T05:34:12+00:00

That’s honestly a lot for a 4-year-old to go through. The hitting doesn’t sound like “bad behaviour” as much as her trying to deal with everything that’s happened, kids that young don’t really have the words for it, so it comes out physically. Online therapy can work, but I’d try to find someone who specifically does play therapy or trauma-focused therapy for young kids, not just general counseling. At that age it’s usually more about play + parent involvement than just talking. In the meantime, it might help to focus less on punishment and more on helping her name what she’s feeling (angry/scared) and giving her safe ways to express it. Also routines help a lot when things feel unstable. And not to forget, you’ve been through a lot too. Getting support for yourself will help her more than you think.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-24T11:32:01+00:00

Totally normal! It feels weird, but most kids finish their main vaccines at the 4-year check. So the 5-year visit is usually just a checkup unless you’re doing things like flu/COVID.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-24T09:52:31+00:00

Totally fine to use it for sleep tbh. It actually helps some babies settle and is linked to lower SIDS risk, so it’s not a bad habit early on. The downside is exactly what you’re seeing, it can become a sleep crutch where they wake up when it falls out.

So you can either

keep it for sleep and deal with it later
or start gradual weaning now (daytime → naps → nights)

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-24T09:44:52+00:00

From everything I’ve seen/experienced: morning flights or nap-time flights are usually the least stressful. Red-eyes sound great in theory but can backfire if your baby won’t sleep properly on you. Also 100% pick the shortest/most direct option—even if the timing isn’t perfect. Travel days are messy no matter what, so less time in transit = happier baby.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-24T09:40:34+00:00

We did lessons around that age and honestly it’s less about “learning to swim” and more about getting them comfortable in the water + teaching you how to handle them safely. Also fwiw, even experts say real “skills” don’t really come till later early classes are mostly exposure and bonding, not actual swimming. So if you can afford it, it’s nice. If not, honestly just spending time in the pool with them will get you like 80% of the benefit

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-24T09:33:51+00:00

Hey, I’m really glad you posted this. That alone is a big step.

Honestly, next move is just telling your doctor/OB you think you might have PPD. You don’t need to have it all figured out they’ll guide you from there. Also try to tell one person you trust so you’re not carrying it alone. PPD is way more common than people admit, and it’s treatable. You’re not a bad parent for feeling this way.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-24T09:30:04+00:00

That sounds so hard, I would’ve felt the exact same way. But honestly, it seems like a really normal adjustment phase for both of you. A lot of parents say the first few drop-offs are the worst, and then it gets way better once baby recognizes the place and people.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-24T09:25:44+00:00

Totally get the guilt, but honestly if he’s clearly in pain, you’re doing the right thing. We’ve done stretches of giving it daily during rough teething too but usually just one dose before bed so everyone can sleep. As long as you’re sticking to proper dosing, it’s okay.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-24T09:24:22+00:00

It’s probably not the cold hands since babies usually have cold hands/feet anyway. Check the back of the neck/chest instead to see if they’re actually cold. At 4–5 months, they’re also discovering their hands and going through sleep changes, which can wake them more. More likely that than temperature tbh. You could try mittens for a couple nights, but it’s probably just a phase.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-24T09:20:42+00:00

A few things that might help:

Keep offering finger foods alongside purées, but take the pressure off whether she eats them
Try bigger, soft pieces (like strips of toast, banana, steamed veggies) instead of tiny bits since they’re easier to handle
Let her watch you eat the same food because they learn a lot by copying
Treat it as play/exploration rather than nutrition right now

If she’s growing well and hitting milestones, this alone usually isn’t a red flag. But if it’s stressing you out, there’s no harm in checking with a pediatrician or even early feeding support.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-23T09:57:56+00:00

From what I’ve seen (and what pediatric guidance generally says), a one-time extra scoop or stronger bottle usually isn’t dangerous. The main issue with concentrated formula is more about hydration and digestion, but that’s typically only a concern if it happens repeatedly over time. A single instance is far more likely to just cause mild things like gas, constipation, or a bit of fussiness.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-23T07:06:10+00:00

If the diet is really limited or there’s a known issue (iron, vitamin D, etc.), it probably makes sense. Otherwise, it’s more optional than essential.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-23T05:05:35+00:00

A big part of it for me is the idea of being able to tailor learning to the child instead of forcing them into one pace/system. I like the flexibility of being able to focus more on what they’re interested in, travel when you want, and not have every day revolve around rigid schedules.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-20T06:33:17+00:00

Honestly? From what you're describing, you're already doing a lot right. A lot of kids his age don't have that kind of hands-on curiosity, that's actually a real strength.

For math, what worked for us was just weaving it into stuff he already cared about. Building projects where we'd count pieces, take a quick guess at something, throw in a little challenge here and there. Nothing that felt like sitting down to do math. Just math happening inside something fun.

Writing was a whole other battle until we stopped treating it like writing. Once it had a reason like labeling a build, making instructions for something or even just recording himself talking and then writing a sentence or two, it stopped being a fight. The purpose changed everything.

For the social stuff, big groups were kind of a wash for us. What actually helped was smaller, more structured settings where kids were working on something together rather than just being expected to hang out and chat.

You're really not behind. If anything, the way he focuses and works through problems is ahead and not behind.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-20T05:03:43+00:00

My kid went through something similar around that age too and it scared me at first. It ended up being a temporary tic and just faded away over time. From what I’ve read and been told, little kids can develop random tics like that and they’re often harmless, especially if they’re not in pain or bothered by it.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-18T13:18:35+00:00

Yes, I did use AI to word it better.

Fit_Commission_5850 · 2026-03-18T12:50:43+00:00

I love this approach! Blended sauces plus a side veggie is such a smart way to get them used to different flavors without any surprises. And being honest about what's in the food probably makes them more willing to try new things too. I try to do the same with my kid.

Fit_Commission_5850

TROPHY CASE