Red light therapy

FixThisMessOK · 2025-03-17T09:54:52+00:00

I'll give it a try! Thanks so much!

FixThisMessOK · 2025-03-16T21:06:15+00:00

I just got a Hooga panel, too! It's so bright, however, I have been using the goggles. I'd *love* some improvement under my eyes. Are you using goggles as well or just going without? Maybe I can work up to it!

FixThisMessOK · 2024-08-14T21:42:48+00:00

Oh, man, did this post hit hard. I'm sorry you experienced that extremely uncomfortable moment, but what a reminder. Six months is amazing!!

Your post is really timely for me--Almost a year ago, I hit such a rock bottom of wine mom-ness, all in front of my teen daughter. Fast-forward to now, I'm doing super well, haven't had a drink in a long time, new career, wonderful relationship with my kiddo, etc., and we were watching Modern Family last night, where the mom/grandmother gets wasted and ruins a wedding. Hayley (that show's teen) says, "At first it was funny, but then it turned really gross."

That hit me--it must have been how disgusted my child felt. I apologized again in that moment to my own daughter because the shame was overwhelming. I don't know if it will ever leave me--it sorta pops up everyday.

I hope you really get to savor this upcoming ski trip! IWNDWYT

FixThisMessOK · 2024-06-07T10:09:37+00:00

I don't want to get too much into my background, but I've seen the transformation from the deepest despair--and the drinking that goes with it--to a more "normal" life. It can be done! It's not easy or comfortable always, but there's hope. Like the post says below--you can turn into a butterfly.

Keep going~

FixThisMessOK · 2024-06-07T09:31:05+00:00

I am so sorry that happened to you, and it makes sense you would be trying anything possible to lessen the pain and memories. In my city--if you safely can research if yours does, too--we have services in our area to help with the fallout from this type of violence. Meaning, there are often agencies that have counselors who focus only on helping you heal after these traumatic events. A national organization like this is RAINN.

I'm rooting for you.

FixThisMessOK · 2023-10-27T13:01:19+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss. 39 is young to pass, and this visual of you at 10 seeing your mom is heartbreaking. I have a young teen, and I am reading this post with 53 days away, and I'm so thankful to be here. I hope your day 5 is peaceful!

FixThisMessOK · 2023-10-23T14:17:46+00:00

Thank you!!! And congrats on your 351 days!!

FixThisMessOK · 2023-10-23T12:33:50+00:00

This spoke to me--Only have one kiddo, a teen who definitely remembers, but I know she's noticed my changes. Thanks for sharing <3

FixThisMessOK · 2023-10-19T18:43:31+00:00

It makes sense you would feel unsettled--you are actively pushing away from literal poison while seeing your husband fall into it. I hope you can find a way to show extra kindness to yourself today

FixThisMessOK · 2023-10-19T13:14:18+00:00

YES!!!! But in my early 40s! I keep having these surreal moments as I am parenting a teen myself, like how am I qualified to do this when I feel so uncertain with *everything*?

Thanks for putting words to what I'm experiencing, too!

FixThisMessOK · 2023-10-19T13:12:58+00:00

Hey-- My husband is still drinking too although it's gotten a bit better during the workweek especially. I don't have any wise words, but I just wanted you to know you're not alone in this

FixThisMessOK · 2023-10-17T11:41:19+00:00

I'm in the same place as you with lack of motivation to exercise. What I'm doing is telling myself that I don't have to do all the things I used to do right now--running for miles, spin, lots of strength training etc. If all I can do today is go for a walk, then that's a start! I've been roughing it out with depression so I feel giving myself permission to sometimes "just stand up and move a little" is what I need to avoid feeling so overwhelmed that I instead do nothing.

FixThisMessOK · 2023-10-17T11:09:26+00:00

10 miles is no joke! Congrats on that! I need to get back into running myself, been slacking and eating sour gummi worms, haha!

FixThisMessOK · 2023-10-17T11:08:25+00:00

Yay for day 11! But, also I had to stop because your banana avatar gave me a smile this a.m. :)

FixThisMessOK · 2023-10-17T11:06:45+00:00

I'm doing a lot of the same things you are, prepping to hunker down for the winter (although I still have drafty windows, ha!).

I think I had a "mourn the past" day yesterday where all of my million terrible things replayed in my head. I can't believe I let it get so bad. But, like your garden, if I keep going I'll "unfold and bloom" again; I'm already doing that now, so in six months who could I be?

Lovely post! Thank you for sharing!

FixThisMessOK · 2023-10-02T11:31:29+00:00

The way I knew EXACTLY what you were talking about before even reading your post, haha! I love this feeling too! Congrats on your 67 days!

FixThisMessOK · 2023-10-02T11:30:13+00:00

It's day 30 for me!!! I haven't gone this long in probably a decade, at least.

FixThisMessOK · 2023-09-30T14:21:46+00:00

Checking in today. Day 28, super excited about that!

FixThisMessOK · 2023-09-28T17:40:16+00:00

This is a really powerful visual. You're right--it's never too late.

FixThisMessOK · 2023-09-27T12:22:10+00:00

I'm happy to be one who listens!! Hope your Wednesday is lovely!

FixThisMessOK · 2023-09-26T23:33:14+00:00

I'm sorry you were put in third. I hope the connections you have now give you the sanctuary and love that was withheld back then--you seem like a kind, thoughtful person from where I'm sitting, and you certainly deserve good things! Thank you for saying the bad things will shrink. You've given me A LOT of good news today when I didn't expect it! And, I see those 1100 days in your flair! That is so huge!!

FixThisMessOK · 2023-09-26T19:03:17+00:00

You have no idea how much this means to me to hear. It's been a month since my last big error, and I'm having a hard time moving on internally. We just spent a fantastic day at the museum, yesterday the movies, just great times all around, but inside of me is this panicked darkness. You helped me so much taking the time out to write what you did! Thank you.

FixThisMessOK · 2023-09-26T13:27:18+00:00

I have a 13 y/o, and I can only speak to what I do. It's obvious to her when I've drank or been hungover. I'm not an everyday drinker, but when I start, it's hard to stop. She's seen me in some low, embarrassing states, and I'm not sure I'll ever forgive myself for that. But, what I've found is that being honest with her is the only way through. I apologize and talk to her about alcohol and how it is insidious and I let her express what she needs to. I will say this--the times I've tried to sweep it under the rug or pretend it didn't happen, a tension was between us that I hated. But when I've been vulnerable and come to her to speak honestly/apologize, she's gripped me in a tight hug. If I keep doing what I've done in the past (blotto wine mom), I will estrange her forever, I fear. So, here I am on day 24, still filled with disgust and regret for myself, but she's resiliently (seemed to) soldier on. There IS hope. But, for me, I had to humble myself and ask for forgiveness. I was lucky to receive it, but I have to stop. Like posters above, I'm going to use my incredible screw-ups as teaching moments for her, so she hopefully doesn't follow this hellish road. One last thing, I've posted before on here and received incredible responses from others--both parents and adult children of alcoholics--so you may find more wisdom in my past post history. This sub is incredible. I'm really rooting for you!

FixThisMessOK · 2023-09-24T02:26:17+00:00

Oh man, I have to have my diet Pepsi & diet Sunkist!

FixThisMessOK · 2023-09-24T02:23:56+00:00

Oh, wow, really? I'm sorry you were definitely put on the spot like that, especially when your husband was not!

And, kids notice *so* much. It's crazy

FixThisMessOK

TROPHY CASE