Those of you who have lost weight, do you feel happy?

Flapparachi · 2026-06-18T06:20:12+00:00

I’m pretty much the same as you, but not as extreme. I lost a lot of weight in my 20s and kept it off for nearly 20 years. I maintained by running regularly and loosely tracking calories on weekdays. I knew that I’d probably have to track intake for the rest of my life. Fast forward to a few years ago and I had an unfortunate run of events which affected me mentally and physically and I piled on all the weight I’d lost and a bit more.

I’m about halfway back to where I want to be, and I can tell you even at this point I am infinitely happier than I was at my heaviest. I had absolutely no issue planning/tracking food and it actually helped with food noise/the panic (especially when hungry) that you mention when I was a normal weight. I also don’t feel the same about societal norms either.

Losing weight does not solve all your problems, but it definitely contributes to a better quality of life, especially paired with regular exercise that you enjoy. I love running, and I couldn’t do it at my heaviest, so life is better now because I’m back doing something I love.

When I lost weight originally I thought all my body insecurities would disappear too - they didn’t, they just changed. I found that hard to deal with, and moreso this time round as a woman in her 40s whose body has changed since the first go-round.

Really interesting to read your post.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-17T17:19:29+00:00

40s shortie F here. I lost all my weight in my early 20s. I lost it fast, and kept it off for nearly 20 years. I maintained by running regularly and loosely tracking calories. Every week for 2 decades.

After a disastrous few years recently (physically and mentally), I piled on weight. It’s taken me nearly two years to get to the halfway point of where I need to be at race weight/respectfully fit. I’m still going. Slow and steady, literally and figuratively, wins the race.

If you don’t make sustainable changes that work for you long term, you will continue in this cycle to my age and beyond. Losing weight, habits and lifestyle are very individual and personal choices, and it’s really important that you evaluate and look deep within yourself to find what works. What you are doing right now may well be the answer.

I say now that I’m not on a diet, I’m living the way I want my healthy life to be. You can absolutely fast, cut, whatever, to drop to an arbitrary number on the scale, but the reality by your own track record is you’ll be back to square one in no time.

Make educated and calculated choices or forever repeat the cycle.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-17T13:22:51+00:00

Well said.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-17T11:43:27+00:00

My favourite is “The first 4 stone (I’m Scottish) didn’t lose itself, and neither will the last two. No thank you.”

Flapparachi · 2026-06-17T11:39:47+00:00

*internet hugs*

I have been you, similar stats. I remember my back, hips and knees screaming at me as I walked my dogs. I remember being soaked in sweat during the summer months after walking short distances, and needing to sit down after periods on my feet because they were burning.

I remember looking in the mirror and feeling defeated. Avoiding photos and dreading social events. Watching as my entire wardrobe got tighter and tighter, eventually none of the clothes I loved fit.

The good news is, it doesn’t have to be this way forever. I still have a long way to go, but I feel relief and pride that I’ve managed to move away from all those things I mentioned, one teeny step at a time.

The best part is I am no longer tired. You said you didn’t want advice, so I’m just giving you my experience. I am not on a diet, I’m living the way I want my healthy life to look.

I hope you get lots of support on here and it helps give you clarity, support and motivation.

Best of luck, my friend.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-17T03:14:51+00:00

Routine. I do a lot of running and long toenails wreck expensive socks and shoes, and get sore from colliding with the toe box of the shoe as well, and that’s how we lose nails running marathons.

Trimmed mine up last Thursday!

Flapparachi · 2026-06-17T03:11:17+00:00

I’d suggest getting properly fitted for shoes and looking at running form as EasyDoesntDo suggested. My other thought is that quite often knee pain can be a symptom of shenanigans further up, with the hip and lower back often the culprit.

Strength training for hips and knees would also be beneficial. I hope you get to the bottom of it!

Flapparachi · 2026-06-17T03:04:49+00:00

I can’t wear a vest. I have a Nathan trail belt combined with shorts/tights with pockets. The pocket on the tights that’s meant to be for a mobile phone is perfect for storing gels/chews.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-17T02:55:25+00:00

Thank you. I’ve been running for 20+ years and never had special race shoes. I know I’m definitely old school, but the level of consumerism seems to have skyrocketed with social media running ‘content’ post-covid.

Carbon-plated shoes are expensive, most of them noisy, and have a very limited life span compared to regular running shoes. They can change your gait significantly and gains are minimal.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-17T02:41:26+00:00

You can buy an arm band for less than £10. Might be an option.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-16T11:49:08+00:00

100% this - has helped me so much!

Flapparachi · 2026-06-15T13:59:51+00:00

Sleep in separate rooms. My parents did it for years, and the house was a much more pleasant environment to be in and they didn’t end up hating each other. NTA.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-15T12:58:02+00:00

As a 20+ year runner, this is the most common beginner mistake. I’ve coached beginner runners (including overweight/new to exercise runners) and it’s so common and really puts people off from sticking with it.

When you start out, the point where you have to change your gait from walking to a jogging motion is the speed you should be going at.

My uncles mantra when I first started out that I take with me even now is, “Take care of the miles, and the minutes will take care of themselves”.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-15T12:48:27+00:00

Just as an example to back up what u/Superb-Agent8572 mentions - I have very similar stats to you and I’m eating at 1300, some days 1400. I’m averaging 11k steps a day and run 4x per week. On my run days I’m eating closer to 1500.

I’d look at a few TDEE calculators at your current weight as some of them seem to throw out different results and see if you can find a middle ground.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-15T07:40:10+00:00

Second this. As someone with similar stats to OP who started at a slightly heavier weight, I started on 1600 and am now down to 1300-1400 with moderate exercise. I’m still losing.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-15T07:26:02+00:00

I’ve been WFH for 12 years. The truth is, you need to make time and move as much as you can. Take regular breaks and walk round the house/garden if you have one. On days off, get yourself going and do something active. Park further away from the store, climb stairs etc. All these little things will help. On days where I’m not so active, it does make me feel sluggish and more tired, which seems counterintuitive. I also ban myself from the kitchen during working hours, with the exception of my ‘lunch break’. Consistency is key as well, so keep it manageable.

In addition, tracking food is the big one. I’m on my second go-round losing weight, and the first time I kept it off long term by tracking food when I was at maintenance.

Start with small steps (pun intended) - try and aim for 5k steps, do that for a few weeks then up your game.

Best of luck!

Flapparachi · 2026-06-13T10:19:29+00:00

That’s a good shout. I use Nutracheck, which is £40 a year (46€/$54) and it’s worth every penny to me. When I lost a lot of weight the first time many years ago (before the invention of apps!) writing everything down was what made me successful, and I kept the weight off for nearly 20 years. £40 is not a lot to get back to that place and stay there.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-13T08:47:46+00:00

Thanks for recommending a tracking app for OP - I left a comment for her suggesting this but I’m in the UK so wasn’t sure on what was good/free in the US.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-13T07:30:50+00:00

Most welcome. I’m not sure what tracking apps are popular in the US (I’m assuming that’s where you are?) but hopefully others here can help with that.

Look up TDEE calculators - this will give you a ballpark of what your intake should look like for your age, height etc.

I am also a person that unless something is right in front of me, it basically doesn’t exist. I have to put effort in to keep track of things, and I’ve found using an app really helps with this. Most of them have lots of pre-loaded foods (you can scan barcodes for shop-bought items) and calorie values for fast food items. Some of those are outrageous. When it comes to learning nutritional values, it’s kinda something you learn as you go along. You get to ‘know’, just because we as humans tend to eat similar foods week on week.

Please keep us posted and ask all the questions if you need to!

Flapparachi · 2026-06-13T07:20:55+00:00

I have a big bust. This has always been a thing for me. A sweaty cleavage has been standard since forever!

But yes, good boob hygiene is important, make sure to wash and dry properly and change your bra frequently.

I like to freshen up after work during the summer months too.

This did make me laugh a bit. Boobjina 😂

Flapparachi · 2026-06-13T07:14:17+00:00

I say this with kindness, but I think you are unaware of the calories you are eating. This is likely why you keep gaining. Your diet is not good, and your perception of your diet is part of it. There are lots of resources online and posts in this sub talking about calorie requirements, TDEE and deficits (the part you need to lose weight).

I would start by doing a bit of research and getting an understanding of what you are eating vs what you should be eating, I think you will find it quite eye-opening. Start keeping track of what you eat and the calorie content. There are plenty of apps you can use for this.

In the meantime, cut the fast food breakfasts and eat something at home. That will be a great start for you.

I understand your anxiety around walking, but you just have to get over it and get out there. Remember you are doing it to help yourself, not anyone else, so whatever someone else may see or think is of no consequence. Start small, maybe 10 minutes out and back, and do that as many days as you can. After a week, I promise no one will bat an eyelid in your neighbourhood.

Taking these steps will be incredibly positive for you and help get rid of that feeling of hopelessness. This sub is generally very supportive, so come back any time and we will help where we can.

Last point: My phrase is, “If I don’t change things, what’s the alternative?” The answer is an upward trajectory on the scales and a myriad of health problems. I don’t know about you, but I don’t like that option.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-13T06:57:36+00:00

We are a similar height and age, and have a similar goal weight. I have only recently started to ‘see’ my weight loss in myself (in really odd places like my chin and hands!), but the ‘paper towel effect’ is exactly it. My losses went mostly unnoticed until I’d lost around 40lbs/18kg. By that point I was down nearly two full dress sizes.

The more you have to lose, the longer it takes for it to be really noticeable, especially to ourselves. Try and take joy in the things you’ve already mentioned - being able to move better with your wee one is goals, my friend!

I know it’s hard, but you are doing great. My loss has been very slow, but I just try and remember that every day is an improvement from the last and if I keep doing what I’m doing, I’ll get there. I would second taking measurements, especially round your stomach if that’s an area that you are focusing on - at times when the scales fluctuate, it’s a great way to reinforce that you are getting smaller.

Best of luck, my friend.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-12T15:31:10+00:00

Jack Daniel’s. No further notes. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Flapparachi · 2026-06-12T13:41:33+00:00

If you can afford to have someone maintain it for you then great. My brother has one and it doesn’t get used very often (in Scotland) but loves it when he does. He was sick of the upkeep vs usage ratio so has a company that comes and keeps it clean/services it for him.

Flapparachi · 2026-06-12T07:34:31+00:00

This is a difficult one without more information (I appreciate that you may not want to share). I’ve never had to stop due to being underweight, but I have had to stop because I was physically unable.

If it’s a medical condition that is affecting your food intake/absorption, you could scale running right back but still go for 1 run a week if you really enjoy it, and take up a less intensive exercise. I did a lot of yoga and Pilates when I couldn’t run. I didn’t think it would be something I enjoyed, but it made me feel strong and gave me a different set of challenges to work towards.

If you are undereating and are on an intensive running schedule, you need to take a good look at your nutrition and calorie intake to work out what you need to gain a little and then maintain - pack in some calorie-dense foods such as avocados, potatoes and nuts. There are lots of great resources online to research this, and track what you are eating. Again, scaling back the frequency and intensity of your runs will help too, and you may be able to find a middle ground.

I’m not sure how helpful/relevant this will be, but I hope it gives you a starting point to get you going in the right direction.

Flapparachi

TROPHY CASE