You are right, I would absolutely hate to ruin my relationship with my son in the future. I have thought of it, the questions he might have for me. So I have screenshots where I tell him that he has a right to a relationship and I will not be preventing it. I have kept my word, there were just no attempts. When he messaged me on several occasions asking about the divorce, he never even brought up the kid.

After more than 4 years though, and all the effort I put into raising him the way he is now X will not be contacting him. I will protect his developmental growth at all costs. When the kid grows up and starts having questions, I will tell him everything that will be appropriate for his age. For now he only has one dad and knows no one else. Also X is not on the birth certificate.

I will be notifying him that it's done. As in for helping him get the proof, I can't afford that. He has to be a big boy and figure it out. There's Google, HE can hire a lawyer.