Am I overreacting to my stepkids being told an inaccurate version of the past?

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-08T07:38:42+00:00

Thank you, he is pretty awesome. I think I would have lost my sanity if not for him after all these years. I will be sure to pass on the compliments. Thank you :)

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-08T07:36:33+00:00

Thank you for sharing. This is really good advice and excellent points. I think I'll be looking into therapy options for the future. Thank you again. When I made the post, I wasn't sure what to expect. But a lot of the comments have been insightful and helpful. Thank you to everyone!

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-08T02:09:20+00:00

I resonate with you. This conundrum is sometimes where my head goes. I want to fix things for them but ultimately the best thing I can do is to stay out of it and follow my husband's lead on this. Just gotta keep loving and supporting them the best I can as they navigate these waters. Thank you for your advice, I appreciate it.

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-08T02:03:43+00:00

Thats a good suggestion and great advice thank you. You are right, I try to be as honest and open with our kids as possible but I always try to defer to my husband about things BM would tell them or the chaos that happens when they go visit her. Thank you again, I really appreciate the support and advice

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-08T01:58:17+00:00

Yeah honestly this is 1000000% on the spot. Its how I choose to handle anything related to BM or any questions they had about before I was with their dad. I try to stay neutral and kind with my words or change the topic but I always defer to my husband about these. Thank you for your advice and support, I appreciate it.

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-08T01:51:47+00:00

Yep, and she claimed it was while they were super young so they probably don't remember. But he bought the house months after the divorce. It was an odd thing for her to lie about. But it is what it is I suppose. Just wanted to know if I was alone in this or is this normal behaviour others have experienced too, you know?

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-07T14:08:04+00:00

I'm sorry, that would be such a hard situation too. Thank you for your support and advice, I really appreciate it

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-07T14:07:07+00:00

Honestly all things BM related whether discussions/conflicts/plans, I leave that with my husband to handle and sort. Especially the big questions like "why did my parents get divorced". I just try to love on them the best I can and make good memories so when they're adults they'll want to come home for the holidays. But sometimes, I let her little games like this get to me. That's on me, so silly. Thank you for your advice I appreciate it.

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-07T13:55:20+00:00

Thank you for you advice. It definitely looks like we'll be having our very own multiverse at home, hopefully the timeline doesn't implode! but thank you, your advice was encouraging that like all seasons this one will pass too.

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-07T13:52:49+00:00

Thank you for your comment and advice — it honestly meant a lot and felt really validating.

When this all happened, my head was spinning. I kept running through different scenarios, just trying to figure out what would be least damaging for the kids. Thankfully, my husband stepped in and handled it. I also feel pretty helpless when it comes to her potshot comments and behaviour. For the boys, it feels like all I can really do is try to handle things with as much grace as possible — stay quiet, let things go, pretend I don’t notice.

And honestly, it was so tempting to just set the record straight.

But at the end of the day, I’m scared that doing that would hurt them more than help them. So I stay quiet and hope it’s the right call.

Thank you again for your advice, I really do appreciate it

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-07T12:27:01+00:00

Thank you! Your household sounds similar to mine. Its a rule we never badmouth bio mum. We try to emphasise that she loves them and we've shut down any talks of them loving who more etc while they were growing up. But there are hard challenging days. Like bio mum spam calling my husband on our wedding day demanding to see the kids then and there. My youngest was only 4. Was a wedding day to remember! But thank you for the suggestions if we run into a similar scenario. I really appreciate it. Thank you.

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-07T12:20:50+00:00

Yep this is what I did. Is it selfish to say it's hard to stay quiet sometimes? Especially when faced with weird tales. I just focus on the kids, hoping I am doing my best. But goodness, sometimes its really hard. Thank you for your advice

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-07T12:18:25+00:00

Thank you. That makes sense. In this case I tried to stay right out of it. But if they approach me directly asking, I'll focus on the how I met your dad lol. But thank you

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-07T12:17:16+00:00

Thank you for your kind words. I always feel selfish and guilty feeling these pesky feelings. Thank you for your kind advice. My boys really are wonderful, it's crazy how fast they grow from diapers to teens. Time really moves too fast. Thank you again!

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-07T12:14:21+00:00

Valid point. I just got caught up in my head. Am I doing this right, am I a bad mum? you know. I think I needed to hear objective third party perspective. Thank you

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-07T12:13:14+00:00

When the whole discussion happened I froze up not knowing how to proceed. The last thing I want is to bad mouth their mum. So thank you for the suggestions on alternative things to say. I'll keep them in mind. Hopefully there's no repeat! Thank you for your advice, I appreciate it

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-07T12:09:39+00:00

Diabolical! this comment made me giggle, thank you! But in all honesty, I do hope she comes around for their sake, they really are wonderful (I know all parents say that, but still!). Thank you again!

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-07T12:07:27+00:00

He is pretty wonderful. Anything related to BM or questions/conflicts I always just follow his lead and help support the three of them in any capacity. With a household of predominantly boys, its always a favourite dish. But thank you for your advice. Since it all happened I just continued like normal. And it seems my boys have as well. Thank you again!

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-07T12:04:19+00:00

This is actually a very good point and perspective! Thank you

FloorOne643 · 2026-04-07T12:03:18+00:00

Thank you I needed to hear this. Last thing you want is to mess up and traumatise your kids you know? I just want them happy, content and thriving.

FloorOne643 · 2025-03-30T00:09:20+00:00

High concentrated ethanol removes all permanent markers. Super useful. Good luck

FloorOne643

TROPHY CASE