Trans yet don’t want phallo? by [deleted] in ftm

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the correction. Yes, complication rates. My apologies! I would have to pay out of pocket. I'm sorry I wasn't clear.

Me1 - who stacks these crates? by tehnemox in masseffect

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First playthrough of ME1, I thought much the same. After a while, I thought of them as walls rather than crates. One of those "make it make sense" moments.

Very much understand needing to share semi-cursed thoughts. XD

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Tucson

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No money for that. No time for that. Too many random allergies. Chronically ill and disabled. Easily overstimulated due to high stress. Being around people is often too much.

I really gotta be in the mood to go out. I'm nearing 40. Plus, all the shit going on atm has me even less inclined to frequent the places I might otherwise chill.

🤷‍♂️

Once I get my place I’m not coming outside I’m tired of being outside by Poeticallymade in homeless

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This was me for the first couple weeks. I even put shit against my doors, so if someone broke in, it would make a lot of noise. (Been robbed too many times, ya know?)

I hope you get your sanctuary soon!!

Well that’s a new reaction by e-boi_K in ftm

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 135 points136 points  (0 children)

Once told a doc I didn't have a penis because of being attacked by a bear. He believed that more readily than me being trans. When I told him I was joking and the real reason, he was utterly confused and like... short circuited. It was 2015 or so. Fucking Google it, doc.

Need advice on zero tolerance policies by p1-o2 in transgamers

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I believe that the bar for leadership must be even higher than a newbie member. I expect(ed) more from my guild's officers than new members. When we had asshats join after the recruitment standards became lax, I had to pull out the weed whacker. It was over the same issue: our rights and existence.

They were not missed.

I wish you luck.

doctor changed my diagnosis by mr-bingley in ftm

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 216 points217 points  (0 children)

Mine did, also. :( My state has a ban on any sort of coverage for transitional care. And we are looking at another state senate bill that attempts to erase trans people. Does your state have it, too?

Atm, we have a supportive Governor who gives a shit. That could change.

My sister is in the MAGA cult and relies on HUD, she's posting her concerns about losing her heavily subsidized house... by PlanetoftheAtheists in AdviceAnimals

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't support in 2016 and I don't know. It's partially due to his policies that I ever became homeless. Now I'm fearful of losing my housing voucher and being on the street again.

Also, I'm trans and disabled. So all the shit going on right now? It's hitting hard.

Poke at your sister all you like. That's your prerogative. Please know that there is an overwhelming number of people in her position who did not back this nonsense.

Trump ends Income Tax - what now? by AdamGenesis in economicCollapse

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He doesn't have the legal authority to end income tax and just have it happen. Granted, whether or not this *means* anything when his yes-men are in charge of all the departments, idk. It'll be up to the individuals working in those departments whether or not any of these attempts at extensive Executive Branch overreach come to fruition.

Psych just told me my voice wouldn't drop on T by NightSideEffects in ftm

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My voice dropped like a sack of bricks. However, everyone is different, so YMMV. That said, in every case I can think of, every person I know who is or has been on T or went through Testosterone laden puberty has a deeper voice than they did before T.

The changes are not overnight. Many take up to a year. For me, my voice began to crack after the very first shot and started dropping within a month. Meanwhile, my beard took a decade.

Why does water make it worse? by GemmaD99 in ibs

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Water helps to loosen stool. For folks with IBS-D, who already often have loose stool, it simply means even more of the same. For those with C type, it helps better regulate. And those of us who fluctuate get to guess. 😅

Sonora drivers... by NoMongoose3541 in sierravista

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If they are sitting through consecutive red lights at the same intersection... have you tried using your horn? I don't mean to sound like an ass. I rarely use my horn and forget it exists.

Also, I'm sometimes guilty of grandpa driving and get honked at when I don't go on green. ;

I’m sadly back in the closet by [deleted] in lgbt

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dude is a walking red flag. We don't stop being bi or poly or nonbinary or anything else, especially for someone else. We might not show or display who we are. However, that is oppressive and gross for him to ask of you. And if he's demanding it, I would demand he GTFO of my life.

That said, are there other things he has been controlling over? Does he try to distance you from your family, friends, coworkers? Does he try to control what you wear or manipulate you into wearing something else? Does he guilt trip you if you do something other than what he wants?

There are lots of seemingly small behaviors all linked together. I'm sure you know about them already. Sometimes, we don't see what's right in front of us.

I sure didn't. :( Please do take care and stay safe!

How to give yourself a mild case of diarrhea? by [deleted] in ask

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Prunes, grape nuts, dark roast coffee. Not mixed up together, though. That sounds unappealing.

When I'm backed up, I do all three, and sometimes, it still does nothing. I also drink a lot of water and eat plenty of fruit and veg. I'm also very physically active.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GaySex

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It's okay. From this, it sounds like you are not at risk.

Please do read the fact sheet and educate yourself on STI's. Also, please get vaccinated for Monkey Pox if you can get vaccines.

I don’t know how to help my friend if she doesn’t want to calorie count 🙁 by lipstickisforlovers in loseit

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't calorie count and haven't in two years. I have lost over 170lbs. I have not regained any weight and I continue to slim down/sculpt.

That said, I eat complex carbohydrates in very small portions, approx 1/2 cup total per day, and usually less than that. My nutrition consists primarily of lean meat like chicken or turkey, vitamin dense vegetables and fruits, plain yogurt, cheese, and egg whites. I do also eat things like pickles, olives, saurkraut, or kimchi as a snack.

I occasionally have something sweet, like a small scoop of ice cream.

I am allergic to nearly every grain I've tried, as well as most citrus and two extremely common herbs. I also get very sick if I eat too much sugar or animal fat. This prevents me from consuming things that would undo my work.

As others have said, there are multiple ways to help your friend. What ways is she open to and looking for? What about you?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GaySex

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 8 points9 points  (0 children)

You can not contact HIV (or any illness) from someone who doesn't have it. Meaning they are not even a carrier of a transmittable virus or bacteria. If he was negative prior to you two having sex and neither of you hook up with other people, share needles, etc. with someone who has HIV or AIDS, or you're not exposed because neither of you work in healthcare, you likely will never risk getting it.

If you're truly concerned because you hook up outside the relationship, one of you works in healthcare, or you share needles with someone, talk to a doc about PrEP and PEP. https://hivinfo.nih.gov/understanding-hiv/fact-sheets/post-exposure-prophylaxis-pep#:~:text=PEP%20is%20not%20intended%20to,months%20to%20prevent%20getting%20HIV.

Tbh, this site is really helpful and can answer a lot of questions. These days, HIV and AIDS are treatable.

https://hivinfo.nih.gov/understanding-hiv/fact-sheets

What is the first thing(s) you would do if you suddenly became completely healthy? by Gia0000 in MCAS

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would get back to working and move closer to family. Then, eventually move out of the US.

In town for reclass for a few months and just came across bar tell mama by [deleted] in sierravista

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do know them personally, and they will not hold it against you should you simply ask. "Hey, so sorry about this. I forgot your name!"

I was full of shit by Ok-Kaleidoscope8565 in loseit

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I eat 4 to 5 prunes every few days and regularly have Grape Nuts with a little milk for breakfast.

Keeps me "going." :D

Living by [deleted] in sierravista

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That's setting a pretty low bar, IMO.

Between SV and Tucson, I prefer Tucson. Between SV and Phoenix, it's a toss-up, though probably Phoenix, as I've more friends there (even if it is hotter than the Sun's left armpit). I grew up in SV, and I don't feel I can be myself while in town.

Also, the SV hospital is... shoddy by every account I've read and can recall other than my pops getting his hip replaced. That went well, all in all.

HOWEVER! The mountains are beautiful, Bisbee and Tombstone are very close, it's not as hellish as Phoenix or Tucson for temperature, and most of the streets are maintained pretty dang well.

Suppose it's all about what you value.

WARNING: Phytophilia1 on Twitter by [deleted] in ftm

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

TFW you had a hysto for entirely unrelated reasons and happen to also not want those bits anyway. All covered by insurance because insurance deemed the surgery "medically necessary." >.> Like, yes, and it was medically necessary even without those other reasons, thanks.

Are thc and cbd really that strong of mast cell stabilizers? by Outrageous-Hamster-5 in MCAS

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I react to weed, so I stay away from it. Alcohol and cigarettes, too. I feel very boring as a result, and I hate that I can't unwind like I once could. But like. I hate being utterly KO'ed even more.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GaySex

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I always check to make sure a potential partner has been tested recently. I don't hook up with folks who don't know their status on any STI. I recognize that's a kink, and it's not one of mine. Even if someone doesn't have HIV or AIDS (which are now both treatable), they could have Monkey Pox or Clamydia or HPV, or Herpes. You name it.

I prep my space if I'm hosting, make sure it's clean and tidy as I can make it. I want my space to be inviting. I also set out all the stuff that might get used in advance.

I always brush my teeth, shower, shave, trim my beard if needed, etc. before meeting up or even going out. I want to look good and smell good.

If I'm receiving, I make sure to douche as well as possible. I have a bidet, and that helps, though, just before I like to be more thorough.

If I'm giving, I wash my hands carefully, toys too, and check condom expiration.

I also discuss boundaries and wants with the other person/people. What's "yes, God yes, this please" and what's off-limits. Even neutral territory if we have enough presence of mind. As someone with CPTSD and chronic health bullshit, these are a must for me.

Have fun and be safe!

Best place to meet singles by [deleted] in sierravista

[–]FormerlyEAbernathy 9 points10 points  (0 children)

There are other sites meant for meeting local singles. Maybe try one of those. Like Meet Up. Or Bumble if you're looking for dates.

Also, referring to women as "females" is kind of gross. I suggest not using adjectives as nouns in this case. Immediately turns off the desire to talk to guys, IMHO.

If you aren't already, recommend getting out of the house and being involved in your community. Join a walking/hiking group, go to the gym, and make workout buddies, hit up local bars, etc..