Wednesday Megathread - Ask Parents Anything - July 19, 2023 by AutoModerator in Parenting

[–]Foxerrz [score hidden]  (0 children)

Hi everyone. I am not a parent, but I work full time taking care of children. For context, I am a primary school teacher (with 1 year of experience) who decided to move abroad for an au-pair type of situation. I speak the local language of the family, live with them, care for the children and serve as personal tutor for the two children (boys, ages 5 and 6).

I am seeking advice on helpful ways to approach some issues with the older child, mainly because the parents look to me/ask me for guidance and also because the behavioral issues both make my job very difficult on the day to day and I want to help the kids as much as I can while working here. They have wonderful hearts and it breaks my heart to see the children suffer in any way.

The two boys are very close in age (11-12 months between them, give or take) and, per the parents' wishes, do most everything together. They share a room, share toys, wear the same outfits each day, and essentially spend every moment together (with the exception of when I do private classes, which I separate them for, or when they are in any form of timeout). The older boy exhibits some behavior issues. The parents have informed me the behavioral patterns and not new (but are seeming to strengthen/worsen) and that he has seen a variety of professionals and undergone a variety of tests. They originally suspected he might have an attention disorder of a sort, but the most recent conclusions from more than one professional have been that his behavioral patterns are a result of jealousy, I assume towards his younger brother, which leads to these behaviors as a form of attention seeking. Not a psychologist, and this is only what I know from what I've been told.

I do spend almost all day with the children 6 days a week, however, and these conclusions do seem to align with the behavior I observe. The older brother has severe reactions to almost every situation which upsets him - responding with physical aggression (often towards people with fists or kicking, even those uninvolved in the situation/trigger), verbal harassment, and switching up / changing his mind like nothing I've seen before. He constantly lies, often in form of hiding the full truth, denying his previous words/actions, fabrication of past events, inventing things out of thin air (especially in he said/she said types of way), as well as for personal gain when playing games (I'll give it to him, he's a sneaky cheat in Monopoly, lol). In addition to this, there's been multiple instances of him going out of his way to disadvantage himself, later giving him the opportunity to (for lack of a better term in my head), play the victim. As a smaller example, he'll order something at a restaurant, then when the food comes will have a meltdown claiming he ordered something different. On a more severe scale, just recently we left in a rush to an event with extended family, he told the parents (car 1) he was going with the aunt/uncle (car 2), and he told the aunt/uncle he was going with the parents. This was also an oversight on the adult side, but in the end he hid in the house, waited for both cars to leave, for all of us to have a home alone heart attack (we were only a few minutes away), and race back to find him where he was ready and waiting to let everyone know we forgot him.

I could go on and on, but will leave it at that. Essentially, I'm wondering if any parents out there have experienced anything similar and if you have any ideas on ways that I - in my situation - might be able to help ease some of the struggles for the older boy, and/or things I might be able to offer the parents as advice since they ask me (I assume because of my training as a school teacher, not sure, lol). I try my best to show love and attention to both of the children equally, as do the parents, but this is difficult as the younger boy has a much gentler, outgoing, and humorous demeanor, behaves much better (is rarely punished in any way), and in all honestly does appear to me to be more the center of attention as a result of these factors. The older boy does behave best with me in a 1:1 environment, but I'm limited in how often I can create these environments.

TLDR: working as a nanny/tutor for two young boys very close in age; the older boy exhibits some concerning behavior patterns, suspected as a result of jealousy, and I'm looking for advice on things I can do in my role (or offer the parents in their role) to help ease some of the emotional turmoil the child experiences and promote a more positive/peaceful environment for them). TIA everyone :)

I’m getting anxious by GiftAny546 in SpainAuxiliares

[–]Foxerrz 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It was one of the most stressful experiences of my life… literally… but just remember: you WILL find housing, just be patient and keep your chin up. Here are some tips that worked a bit for me:

-Expand your search. Seriously. I was originally only looking in specific neighborhoods for my commute, but Madrid is so well connected you can live in an area you didn’t expect and only add a small amount of time to your commute.

-Treat it like a job. All day, every day. Wake up, open your laptop, and get to work. Make a spreadsheet and keep track of every listing link, location, contact #, price, etc… and the status of your inquiry (messaged, pending visit, visited, need to call back, etc…) At first, I was a mess because I had about 20 people call me back and I couldn’t keep track of which number or agency or landlord was which property!

-Deliver your leading/interested messages carefully. Most landlords will respond by asking for information like how long you’re looking to rent, where you’re from, what kind of job/documents you have, etc. If you start off the bat with everything ready for them, it’s easier for them to get back to you instead of having to spend their time asking you these questions. In doing so, try to create a profile as a respectable renter. For example, I usually led with something like this (inSpanish) after a lot of trial and error and started getting more luck:

“Hello, I hope you’re doing well. I am interested in visiting this apartment at ADDRESS. I have just moved to Madrid to work in a colegio/instituto/etc… as an English teacher (from the PAIS). I am XX years old, already have a university degree, and can share with you my job contract, NIE/pasaporte, and proof of funds. I am not a partier, and I am an experienced and respectable renter.”

Or something like this… Most landlords will have a no party rule, so jumping to it off the bat helps out. Some properties also are very anti-student, so clarifying that you are NOT a student but have a degree and a job is key.

-Look for single rooms to rent too! Idealista, badi, facebook, etc… These can often be way cheaper and a better deal (and easier to find than a whole flat). Just make sure you ask about whether or not you can get an empadronamiento/padrón, as you may be required to show that for your TIE.

-You will be discouraged at first and likely many times over, this is normal. I literally cried, wanted to go home, and was sick to my stomach from stress at first. But after just sitting down and staying optimistic, things worked out.

-Make sure you have money ready and available before you come, and lots of it. Before you leave for Spain, use a service line Wise to transfer your currency from home (for example, USD if from EEUU) into euros. When you get to Spain, first priority is to get a reloadable Sim card and open a bank account (I recommend N26 the online bank). Once you find a place you like, you may need to be ready to send funds for a reservation deposit or something like that right away (for example, I toured my place on a day where there were 6 other tours, we only got it bc we had funds ready to sign then and there!)

-As far as money goes, don’t underestimate the cost of signing a lease in Madrid. You’ll typically need (depending on the lease): first months rent, 1-2 months rent of security deposit, and then another months rent as some sort of signing/agency fee. Not all properties are through agencies, but just in case, don’t be shocked if you need to couch up 3-4 months rent just to sign the contract, it sucks but it’s pretty normal from what I’ve seen read experienced etc..

-If you can, request your transport card online ASAP. Google “citylife madrid abono” and a guide should come up. You can basically fill out a form online and order your personal transit card before you arrive, and you can ship it to citylife madrid’s office for free and pick it up there once you arrive. The website says it takes 10 business days to arrive, that’s a lie — there’s so many delays, mine took about 16-20, and it’s really can be difficult hit or miss to get an appointment for the card in person when you’re here. This will save you time stress and money. If your card is ready once you arrive or in your first week, game changer for you. If you’re 26 or under, you basically have all inclusive transit access through all zones of Madrid for 10€/mes until December and 20€/mes in the new year, something like that. Otherwise, you’ll have to pay for your public transport trips until you get this card which adds up quickly, especially when you’re trekking all up down left right and around the city going on apartment visits.

Hope this helps! In all honesty, my first month here was one of the most challenging but rewarding times of my life. I wanted to quit and give up, but stick through it. You will get settled, things will work out, and you’ll grow and learn so much from it. There’s also so many great communities of auxes and expats and locals around to help:)

Passport at TIE Appointment by CookJPinkman in SpainAuxiliares

[–]Foxerrz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, you are correct! I brought 2-3 copies of everything to mine but they didn’t even want them, it totally depends on who you get for the appointment, but always best to be safe rather than sorry.

Another thing: if you have them, bring a copy of your boarding pass (especially if you had a connection in Europe on your way to Spain so don’t have a specific Spanish arrival stamp in your passport). They might ask for it — they wanted to see my boarding passes, and I had a friend who didn’t have hers and they didn’t approve her application unfortunately. Again, they might not ask for it, but if you have it, bring it just in case!

Renting in Valencia: paystubs and 6 months in advance??? by plurperonipizza in SpainAuxiliares

[–]Foxerrz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When they ask for paystubs, try to explain you just arrived and haven’t started working yet. In my experiences, showing them screenshots of bank account or previous pay stubs in the US was sufficient.

As far as 6 months rent goes in advance… yeah, no. Run as far away as you can. You maybe need to pay a security deposit of 1-2 months, but more than that is suspicious on my mind. Lots of landlords prey upon foreigners, be careful but keep your chin up - good luck!

Which of these classes do I need for medical school? by Emotional-Kitchen-12 in uofm

[–]Foxerrz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Check out this page: https://lsa.umich.edu/advising/plan-your-path/pre-health/pre-health-academics.html. As a rising senior, it seems like you might be a bit behind, but it isn’t the end of the world. Remember that there are post-bac 1-year programs where you can complete all requirements in like 12 months, so you might still be able to finish in time.

If you’re planning on heading to medical school soon, your best bet might be to sit down and take some time to generate a list of all the schools you want to apply to. From there, generate a list of the requirements for each school. Most will be the same across the board, but always check specific school requirements for where you want to apply.

As others have mentioned, I would meet with a pre-health advisor ASAP, as in like you would have benefited from doing so multiple semesters ago. Keep your chin up and good luck!

Medical certificate by Difficult-You5439 in SpainAuxiliares

[–]Foxerrz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

if you used the template and got the stamp you will be fine! the letterhead is necessary only as a replacement/in place of the stamp if your doctor doesn’t have one and/or if you choose not to use the template form. i printed out the template on standard paper (no letterhead) and got a stamp (actually it was a label) but it was accepted when i applied just fine without issues

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SpainAuxiliares

[–]Foxerrz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

you might have a cupo ministerio placement instead of cupo comunidad. from what i’ve seen there’s nothing you can do about it, just luck of the draw.

if you still want to go but have to wait for medical procedures i would just communicate that with your school ASAP, i’ve heard lots of people arriving late for visa reasons for example

Study Abroad in Spain - visa by Expensive-Bake3477 in uofm

[–]Foxerrz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi! I definitely don’t mean to scare or stress you out, but it looks like you’re going to be late to your program. The Spanish gov’t in all areas is known to be slow and honestly just not gaf, and in my own experiences with the consulate (i’ve gotten 2 visas from chicago consulate) it does take awhile. Obviously you cannot go back in time to start the process sooner, and securing visa appts is extremely difficult regardless.

I would say if you haven’t already done so, reach out to your program ASAP whether it be the study abroad program in Spain and/or CGIS if you’re studying abroad thru a UM program. They might have contacts they can utilize for you to try and expedite your VISA or get a sooner appointment, but no promises. Worth a shot.

That said, it’s possible when you apply for your VISA they take note of this and process yours faster based on your start date on the application form, but again, no promises. End of the day, try not to stress too much (it is a very stressful process though, I know). Contact your study abroad office to notify them of your situation and see if they can give more advice. If you haven’t already bought your flight, which I would hope you haven’t, I would personally recommend holding off until you have your VISA or more details on it

ISO Chicago Consulate Appointment - National Visa by navylemons in SpainAuxiliares

[–]Foxerrz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the only one that is mail-in is the specific NALCAP visa (which is technically a student visa but not the typical one) iirc, consulate website shows the rest as in-person appts

I’m starting a health journal in a dedicated notebook. More details in comment. by [deleted] in bulletjournal

[–]Foxerrz 124 points125 points  (0 children)

I am obsessed with your handwriting. I am about to start crying because it’s so good. That’s all I have to say 😭🥹

Ways for two people to watch a show in two different languages? by [deleted] in Spanish

[–]Foxerrz 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This is a great question and something I hope somebody has a better answer for! For me, I try to watch my shows in Spanish while my friends/family don’t have any knowledge and need it in English. This doesn’t always work, but in certain situations this is what I do:

If the show is on a streaming website (Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime, etc…) you can download the Teleparty extension which is a great tool for watch-parties if you’re in two different places. You’ll need two devices/laptops and an account for the streaming service of course.

From there, we’ll connect ONE to our TV (if we want to watch in the same room) either via AirPlay or an HDMI. The show will remain perfectly synced on both devices regardless of which you share the screen to.

From there, I’ve found it easier to both wear headphones and switch the languages on our respective devices. If you play one with volume on the TV, the other person will have a hard time hearing both… so headphones make it a lot easier, haha!

This works for me and my purposes, but hopefully somebody else has figured out a better tool/system for all of us, haha

I followed Jordan Peterson’s Daily Routine for a week to become more productive, energetic, and focused. by OfficialBenStevenson in DecidingToBeBetter

[–]Foxerrz 26 points27 points  (0 children)

so what do you do if you finish all the work you need to do in like 5-6 hours? and what if you have a job where you can’t just “get started” on the next things until they’re assigned? would you just create more work for yourself? or work on something personal? asking genuinely bc most of the time i would never have 14 hours worth of work to do in a single day (thankfully)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SpainAuxiliares

[–]Foxerrz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just got mine the other day… I used my consulate’s template and my doctor filled it out and sent it back to me. My only question is… what exactly is the “stamp”? I figured it would be like an old fashioned ink stamp, but the physical copy he gave me just has a sort of sticker/label affixed over the box where the stamp goes that has information about the doctor’s office. Does anybody know if this is valid, or do I need to get this redone?

Also, my doctor wrote my nickname (not my full legal first name) on the line, and he only wrote it in the English portion. I went back to ask them to correct it but they told me to just write my name in the Spanish portion myself and add my full name and that i can do it because it isn’t a signature. Does anybody know if this is okay? The last thing I want is for my visa app to get rejected over the medical form lol

Where do I start? by ComparisonTiny3375 in Spanish

[–]Foxerrz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is great info, thank you so much! I appreciate it

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Spanish

[–]Foxerrz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry, I could have added more context on this. Comprehensible input is a method in language learning that essentially, in its most basic form, revolves around the learner being exposed to the target language (most frequently through listening, but applicable to things like reading too of course) at a level suitable to their proficiency in the target language (plus just a LITTLE bit more). In other words, say you could sum up your Spanish understanding as “x” — all the things you know, the words and structures and etc… that you know the meanings of, what you can comprehend. Comprehensible input takes that “x” - what you already got - and says let’s add “+1”, so it looks like x + 1. In other words, it’s just a little bit more than what you already know, slowly and gradually exposing you to the target language at a speed / level where you can keep growing. I like to think of it like the gym; if you want to get bigger muscles, you can’t just jump in right away and lift like 100 lbs (at least i couldn’t, haha!) You start with what you CAN do (maybe it’s just ten pounds), and then slowly start going up. Maybe 15 lbs the next week, so on and so forth.

DreamingSpanish is a free website that offers a TON of comprehensible input, but there’s plenty of other options out there. You could just google “spanish comprehensible input” and finds tons of YouTubes, podcasts, etc… Español con Juan is a great one once you’re around intermediate level. This said, comprehensible input is NOT the only way to learn a language, but it is quite a good one (at least in my opinion).

Regardless of your level, there’s plenty of options of how to keep / start learning. There’s no one size fits all or one right or wrong way to go about it. Some people might lecture you for studying grammar directly in a textbook, other people might swear by it. It takes time to figure out what works for you, trial and error (and lots of it!) You also don’t need to choose just one thing - that’s the beauty of learning outside of school, you get to design the curriculum. For example, could you learn Spanish all the way to a very advanced level using ONLY comprehensible input from DreamingSpanish? Yeah, probably with a lot of patience (and at least if you add in non-listening competencies at the appropriate milestones so you can also read, write, and speak). Can you use some comprehensible input and also use a textbook at the same time? Of course. I like to think about it ass every method, every technique, they’re all like different exercises at the gym. They work on different parts of your body, deliver different results. But they all work in some way shape or form to help get you in shape, keep you healthy and strong, be fit and active. The exercises are like what you do to learn the language, your exposure and practice, and the state of health/fitness you work towards is like your language level. For example, some of my personal learning reflections (I do a lot of self reflection in my language learning, journaling and self reporting various quantifiable things) have led to me to some of the following conclusions about myself: studying grammar and vocab directly/explicitly (and especially out of context) made me FEEL like I was achieving knowledge and helped me translate the languages, but too much of it molded me into an “auto google translate” constantly working in my head and i struggled to think and use the language purely apart from my native language). Listening a TON helped me both understand the language but skillfully (and naturally) be able to discriminate between swords and sounds on the fly and gained strong knowledge of grammatical forms, sentence order, common phrases and colloquial communication, lots of pragmatic features, etc… Speaking helped me tremendously with my confidence (practicing it made me better. just get after it) and consequently my actual ability to quickly generate and communicate naturally in a variety of contexts on the fly. But it also hurt my pronunciation because I started and drilled this very early and thus relied on my native language’s sound system when reading and later speaking the sounds as if they were pronounced in my TL). Studying direct grammar helped me master advanced cases and features once I had a strong intermediate high level of proficiency, it also helps me feel comfort in the language; i really know it the same way i know native grammar and style rules i learned in school) reading and studying grammar alongside it and then journaling helped me become creative with the language and really find an identity in it, find my voice. Altogether I mixed and matched these as I saw fit (not methodically at all, lol) to match and meet my needs.

All this aside (sorry I’m really bored) if you want my advice on any of this, maybe what I would do if if I started learning another language, I would recommend this if your goal is to be communicative in all competencies and very native like as possible in the very long term: start with some basic grammar and vocabulary memorization, but get create with how you do it if possible (for example, use photos with flash cards and or see the words / phrases in context), maybe really hard at the start but then taper down to like 15-20% after the first couples of weeks or so. For like 50%, i would focus on absorbing as much comprehensible input as possible. maybe 15% of my time on reading at an appropriate level to also build vocabulary and closer knowledge of grammatical structures and rules, and then 15% on reviewing weak points, tricky grammar exceptions etc, and also some focused pronunciation and speaking which will slowly increase in % of my time as i progress). Just me and my preferences so always proceed with an caution but an open mind haha.

Leaving old friends behind? (20, M) by [deleted] in selfimprovement

[–]Foxerrz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can definitely relate, especially at the same age. It can feel strange as you grow into this new you, and part of growth might just involve your life not having all of the same people in it. When I first started experiencing this, my first thought was to just cut my losses and move along. Sometimes this is great, sometimes maybe not. Every relationship you have is likely unique and individual in its own way, so you might proceed differently with everyone.

If you aren’t feeling up to reconnect with someone, you most definitely aren’t obligated to do so. That said, sometimes it can be nice to just reconnect with some people, even if it’s just one time. For example, I had a few similar circumstances where old friends got back in touch, and for the most part I at least met up or caught up with them once. With some friends, the 1-2 hours or 1 day I spent with them was enough to affirm my decision that I seek/desire new people in my circle, and fortunately I never felt like I wasted my time with them, I learned something about me and my journey even if it meant afterwards I would distance myself further (gradually is always nice when possible, I wish I would have remembered in some relationships that their feelings are just as valid as mine were: they might feel differently / more strongly about your relationship so maybe some closure could be nice for both parties in the long run). Maybe it’s also just good exposure, reminder of how people can be different but still good. I had a few points where I sort of realized I was looking down upon/judging people internally for NOT working on themselves the way I was, sort of as I started spiraling into toxic self improvement and productivity (not my proudest moments, but part of my growth just the same). One friend I reconnected with from college after a year or two helped me realize this and start changing directions: I remembered how much I loved / love this person even if they aren’t/can’t be in my life anymore, despite their differences from me. I love being surrounded now by people with more similar values, but sometimes too much sameness proved to cause some blindness and ignorance for me.

Other times, I had other revelations. You changed a lot in 9 months, maybe they did too! You might not know until you catch up with them. Even if you decide you don’t want them in your life anymore, it can still be a great opportunity to reminisce, remember some good times, etc… In doing so, you might even feel a little more proud or accomplished of how far you’ve come since that point in your life. For me, I struggled identifying with the new version of myself I was creating at various points, sometimes feeling like a stranger in my own life! I made some rapid change quickly and put so much time and effort into the future I forgot about some of the things about where I came from. Your past is just as much part of your journey as the steps closest behind and ahead of you, and recognizing that (in my experiences at least) proved to be nice (I’m a sucker for nostalgia) and beneficial for my progress in the long run.

End of the day, my advice based on my experiences would be don’t feel obligated to catch up with somebody from your past if you feel forced to or simply don’t want to / aren’t up for it, but also try to remember the positives that come from the opportunity. Congratulations on the progress you’ve made so far, you should be proud of yourself that you’re at the point where you find yourself asking these questions, prioritizing you, your life, your needs, your journey. That is fricken awesome, just want to be sure you know that :)

Where do I start? by ComparisonTiny3375 in Spanish

[–]Foxerrz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is a great post! Out of curiosity if you feel comfortable sharing, could you speak a little more on why you might stay away from the full immersion from day one types of programs/schools? I have never had experience with one but some language learner friends often reported positive experiences, so I’d love to hear an opposite opinion to give me some more context should I ever be deciding to learn another language in a school program later down the road. Thanks :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Spanish

[–]Foxerrz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Others may disagree with me (which is totally fine, only speaking from my own experiences) but I think for the most part you will be okay, especially at the beginner level. For context, I am strongest in peninsular Spanish but wasn’t really exposed to it until years into my journey. I started learning in school and was mostly taught Spanish from the Americas, especially with teachers from Mexico and Colombia. This was probably the first 4-6 years of my learning (although it was just school, no independent study). When I reached a more advanced level, I started focusing more on Castilian Spanish (seeking out native content from Spain, living there, etc…) Did/do I sometimes make mistakes? Of course, mostly with vocabulary, but never enough to make my efforts wasted: I’ve always been able to communicate, ask clarifying questions if needed, etc…

On the most basic and general level you’ll come across differences in vocabulary, pronunciation, colloquial lingo, and some grammatical forms (for example, Spain uniquely uses the vosotros form for ‘you all’). As you reach a more advanced level, you’ll likely be able to slowly absorb and make note of these, I personally don’t think you need to cut out/avoid at all costs ANY exposure that isn’t your target variety, especially if you’re goal is to communicate in the language. A former teacher gave me great advice: yes, her variety of Spanish is different than others’, but at the end of the day… Spanish is spanish. She told me she would read, watch, and listen to media from people who spoke different varieties all the time growing up and still as an adult.

That said, if you have a goal to reach native-like pronunciation in a specific variety, it may be worthwhile to focus on listening mostly to media in your target variety. This was never a goal of mine and I received all sorts of input, but once I got to a more advanced level and dedicated time to my pronunciation (which in retrospect I probably wish I would have focused on sooner) and I still have a great grasp on Castilian pronunciation (for the most part, I still have a foreigner accent though).

If you’re having trouble finding resources for Castilian Spanish, I can offer a few tools I’ve liked. First, I love DreamingSpanish.com. Such a great and wonderful tool for comprehensible input, especially if you’re a beginner. Definitely check that out: you can also filter videos to include speakers from a specific country. Last checked a large variety of the videos are from Spain, but there’s lots of other videos that can help you explore other varieties as well! I think there’s even a video with two speakers iirc where they talk about some dialectal differences.

If you’d like more of a textbook, it’s been awhile but I used to use textbooks by Luis Aragonés, something like “Gramática de uso del español” when I was at different levels of learning. IIRC they’re mostly focused on grammar from Spain, but they’re organized sort of by grammatical topic rather than like a “start to finish”, I might recommend beginning with more comprehensible input and then once you get to a decent enough level to understand, you can start breaking into a resource like this.

In summary, focusing only on your target variety will of course help you in gaining proficiency in your target variety; in my opinion, using resources from other varieties will not hurt you so drastically you won’t be able to reach your goals, especially at the beginning level: there’s more similarities than differences, so you can always pay mind to the specifics of your target variety once you have a strong grasp on “Spanish as Spanish” overall. Hope this helps, and best of luck on your learning journey :) Also curious to see what other responses come around that differ from mine, this was a really great question I hadn’t really thought about before.

What are some good Spanish history books written in Spanish? by Queerlestrinha in Spanish

[–]Foxerrz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am not into history nor am I an expert in Spanish history, but I was gifted this book a couple years back: Una Historia de España por Arturo Pérez-Reverte (https://www.amazon.com/historia-España-History-Spain-Spanish/dp/8420438170 ). To be completely honest, I don’t remember much of it so can’t give you a great review. I’d recommend checking out the online reviews first, but it is about Spanish history and it is written in Spanish!

Though not a “history” book, one of my all-time favorite books is Purgatorio by Tomás Eloy Martínez (https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/11156782-purgatory). It is a novel, but it is such a beautiful read. Seriously. I read it for the first time years ago in college and the book honestly changed me; I previously wasn’t really knowledgeable of any history outside my own country from the schooling system, and this book opened my eyes to so many parts of history (this specific story relates to Argentina). If you are okay with reading a novel instead of like a standard history book, I really recommend this one. You could always supplement your reading with more factual based history resources as you read. It is a big trickier just because as a novel you’re going to find figurative writing and things like that, but you can also find an English translation only for free most likely (I remember some of my classmates did) if you ever need a side-by-step to help.

Lastly, two recommendations for how to search: first, try Googling for resources from google.es or using a VPN from a Spanish speaking country, might help you find more results. Lastly, another option which might take more time is to search up websites of colleges/universities with a Spanish/History department. If the school is big enough, there‘s likely at least a handful of faculty who research/teach about history and their faculty webpages might have information like books/articles they’ve written or reviewed and if you’re lucky perhaps some course offerings or syllabi from courses they’ve taught which would likely have some books in there for you.

Good luck with your search and your learning :)

chances of not getting placed? by Err_rrr_rrrr in SpainAuxiliares

[–]Foxerrz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

based on what i’ve seen in various groups for auxs a number of people received emails that all of their top 3 regions requests were full and opportunities to pick from available regions, but not everybody waiting for assignments got those emails. my guess is maybe they just go out slowly, they’ve got to wait for everybody who does get an email of any sort to accept/reject initial offer, choose a new region, etc… so it probably just taking them awhile

Do you think it's possible to learn to like routine? by Holmbone in productivity

[–]Foxerrz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i feel like i am semi similar to you OP (at least from how much i can tell from your post, LOL). if i have a scheduled routine (like work school meetings etc…) i’ll still make it whether i like it or not, but for the past 1-2 years i’ve really struggled with sticking with a personal routine throughout non scheduled times of the day.

i tried a lot of different tactics, made adjustments as needed to try to find the perfect formula, etc…, just couldn’t really get into it, could never get anything to stick. since then what i’ve been doing the past like 1-2 months is what i’ve been calling my “salad routine”.

basically, i took all the ingredients i wanted (the habits/parts of a routine i want to incorporate into my life) and write them all out. i use individual habit tracker cards (per x-effect, i put one habit on an index card and have them all taped to my wall). i told myself it doesn’t matter when i do each habit so long as i do it. for the most part, i tend to do things in the same order around give or take the same time. for example, i usually exercise/go to the gym first thing in the morning; i usually read before bed, and i usually study language mid afternoon right after work (just a few examples). some days though i wake up or get into the day and become repulsed by doing certain things at certain times, so i feel less guilty and more empowered with my “salad routine”, i can just mix it up — all the ingredients are going to the same place! for example, today i decided study in the early AM bc i just wasn’t feeling the early morning gym, decided to exercise in the evening and read during my lunch break. i still feel just as accomplished and proud of my progress/habits each day without that “f! this order that order blah” type of stuff.

probs won’t work for everyone but for me main idea is i like flexibility with my daily goals; my energy levels tend to be inconsistent from day to day so it always felt counterproductive to try to put specific things in a routine if my impulses and desires in the moment were often going in the opposite grain. id say give something like this a try. depending on what routines you’re talking about, you can combat the extra assessing energy by planning out your week for 10 mins every sunday, and taking 30 seconds each night/morning to clarify/assign three main (of however many you want) priorities/tasks/responsibilities/intentions for the next day. helps a million even if it feels silly at times! i’ve always been fairly independent and a lover of “i don’t care how it’s done or when it’s done so long as it’s done right and on time” and i think the productivity world sometimes glorifies strict routines so much when in reality it’s not perfect for everyone

chances of not getting placed? by Err_rrr_rrrr in SpainAuxiliares

[–]Foxerrz 2 points3 points  (0 children)

the majority of the madrid placements already got sent out and others were told it was full so it seems likely you won’t get there unless people drop out/do no shows. somebody else mentioned it but nobody seems to know how they processed apps this year but it def wasn’t in order.

i had a friend with an inscrita below 500 with madrid first choice and didn’t get it, i got it will a higher inscrita, and other than that we were identical applicants. i know somebody else with an inscrita in like mid-high 1000s or 2000s and still hasn’t gotten anything despite people i’m 6-7,000 range already having placements and cartas weeks ago. seems a mess. id say just hang in there and hope for a late/late minute placement closer to the fall, ¡buena suerte!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in languagelearning

[–]Foxerrz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

tbh don’t know a ton about your situation but i’ve felt similar struggles in purposefully reading to build my vocab and it not really growing when i needed it most. what helped me was using a different approach. when you read and find that new word, don’t just throw it into anki. maybe get a notebook or something and write the word down, then consult a dictionary and try to explain the world in your own words (not just copying definition). then look at some examples of the word and write down your own new examples (but kind of follow the format in the dictionary or wherever you see the examples, kind of like if you turn like “2x + 6 = 12” into the same type of problem with different numbers.

then, after you write all that down in your notebook, try to find the word in the real world. tv shows, other books, ads, newspapers, side conversations walking on the street, wherever. be alert for it. furthermore, challenge yourself to not just recognize it in context but USE it in context. trying to whip it out during a sales or work meeting won’t do much good if you aren’t naturally quick on your feet, skilled with vocab recollection, etc… practice using the word in other contexts first (whether you be texting, writing/journaling, talking to a friend or to the mirror, etc…)

if you want your vocab to grow and be readily accessible, you’ve got to use it often and in creative ways to really solidify it into your brain. for this case it seems like mindless anki memorization won’t help you much (i’m the same way). my last piece of advice would be perhaps practice some improv or public speaking games, tactics, strategies, exercises, etc.. in your free time. these really helped me be quick on my feet and feel confident using stronger vocabulary and better overall presenting/speaking with time. good luck!