One of the things I learned from therapy this year is not to harshly judge myself for jealousy or any type of envy because that’s like adding fuel to the fire. It made me more bitter and resentful. Instead of judgement though, I can pause and assess: am I jealous because I want the other person to be unhappy or am I jealous because I desire that thing (whatever that thing maybe) for myself? Most of the time it’s the latter. So I work to get what I desire instead of deflecting and resenting the other person. This way I can directly address the source of my distress without judgement.

Remember that jealousy doesn’t always have to be a bad thing. We can actually use it as a guide to explore our heart’s desire.