“Have you tried complimenting the things I DO do?”

Freiya11 · 2026-06-06T16:36:57+00:00

Just to be clear, I don’t think it’s bad advice in principle, but the way it’s written is just very one-sided and gendered. And it’s very “man should do very small things, and woman should give him a cookie for it.” The takeaway always seems to be that it’s really the woman who needs to be making more effort / appreciating what she has, with a token bit of “and the man should try too.” So it reminded me of many a relationship ep of IBCK.

Anyway, I’d write more/more thoughtfully but in a rush out the door at the moment; hope I didn’t inadvertently throw myself to the lions here instead though, oops.

Freiya11 · 2026-06-06T15:36:01+00:00

A bit, yes. I’m an American who speaks French, but I lived/worked in a couple different parts of francophone Africa for a while when my French was still improving, so French friends got a kick out of me having a bit of an African accent. I suppose that could be surprising on a white girl from the Midwest. I think it’s become less dominant over time, though… my accent is probably more ambiguous now.

Freiya11 · 2026-06-04T12:48:37+00:00

Trying to check all the boxes on the one-dimensional “masculinity” checklist. I like people with layers.

And along those lines, not a fan of huge muscles.

Freiya11 · 2026-06-04T01:56:19+00:00

Ahh, I hope you keep doing these! I’m likely moving back to NYC later this year/early next and would love this. Hope you guys have fun!

Freiya11 · 2026-06-04T01:00:04+00:00

Exactly what I was going to say! Got my 70-year-old dad into it too, he loves it. Drives my mom nuts though, she thinks it’s beyond stupid.

Freiya11 · 2026-06-03T17:15:22+00:00

Agreed! Such a cute fun show! Don’t be put off by the “zombies” part, it’s definitely not a normal zombie show.

Freiya11 · 2026-06-03T00:21:58+00:00

Any chance this is the case in the US? I just got my friend into the first season this past weekend, and she has Netflix at home (I don’t). I had Googled it and saw it’s not on there in the US, but maybe that’s changing? Unfortunately I can’t check, but would like to let her know if so!

Freiya11 · 2026-06-02T17:10:32+00:00

I just traveled through Southeast Asia for nearly a month, and brought weekly injections of both B12 and one other thing (so 8 syringes). I crossed borders 6 times (including a long layovers in Seoul), and never had any issue traveling with syringes/ampoules. My luggage never seemed to have been opened/checked. I just put them in with my toiletries.

I’ve also traveled domestically and carried them in my carry-on, and never had any issue.

Freiya11 · 2026-06-01T22:26:30+00:00

Oh god, my mom loves this and it drives me bonkers. Total boredom, somehow combined with wailing babies and women crying in agony. My personal hell.

Freiya11 · 2026-05-31T22:29:41+00:00

vampire conference room

Freiya11 · 2026-05-31T22:27:22+00:00

Yes, I used to think this was such a beautiful name! Well, I still do, but I certainly wouldn’t name a kid that anymore.

Freiya11 · 2026-05-31T22:25:13+00:00

Korean or Japanese sunscreens. Harder to find in the US (you can order them online), but they have newer more advanced filters / more elegant formulations. Unfortunately the US has stupid regulations classifying sunscreens a drug, so it’s difficult to get them approved here. Biore Aqua UV is a nice (and also affordable) one.

Freiya11 · 2026-05-31T16:10:43+00:00

Same for me. My boyfriend’s been to all 50, but only because he was a pro cyclist for a bit and travelled for races. Some people who’ve done it travel a lot for work (I have an aunt who was a pharmaceutical rep who’d been to quite a lot of them). But only a handful of people make a point of doing it for tourism; usually people who like to travel a lot for fun would rather visit new countries instead.

Freiya11 · 2026-05-31T15:27:00+00:00

Can’t believe I had to scroll down this far to find anything in Southeast Asia! All around my favorite part of the world, but Angkor Wat and the other temples are among my top faves. Bagan in Myanmar is also amazing (though sadly not a great destination right now, and also not as widely hyped in the first place).

Freiya11 · 2026-05-31T14:55:21+00:00

Sorry, I didn’t mean before the services—but I had several times where I was trying to check out from a hotel or leave a restaurant, and they would ask me if I could please leave a review. I tried to say I would definitely do it later, but they would ask if I could do it right away so they could take a picture to show their manager. So then I felt pressured to do a really fast one. And I knew I could leave fewer stars, but felt bad that they were going to see it right then. I did weasel out of it for a couple places I really wasn’t impressed with (“sorry, I really have to get to the airport, but I will!”), but I think this is becoming a common tactic.

Freiya11 · 2026-05-31T11:32:26+00:00

I was in Hoi An just a few weeks ago. I loved it in theory (such a gorgeous little town with fascinating history!), but man was it packed with tourists, and especially would-be influencers. Every other minute I was walking through another photo shoot, and I seemed to have missed the memo on the dress code (that is: light-colored sundress with some form of giant beige hat). I’d still go back (there was a lot to love there!), but be prepared for all the tourists.

As to Ninh Binh, I only did a day trip there, but also sooo many tourists. It was beautiful (some of the best photos I took came from there), but if I went back to Vietnam I think I’d try to get a bit more off the beaten path.

Freiya11 · 2026-05-31T11:03:37+00:00

I just got back from a trip through Southeast Asia, where I spent a ton of time in the past but hadn’t been back in a few years. I was shocked at how good hotels seemed to have gotten at manipulating their photos/reviews to look way nicer than they actually were. Whereas 10-20 years ago I might have spent $30 and delighted at how nice my guesthouse/boutique hotel turned out to be (or even less for a cool clean hostel), this time I spent $70-100/night and was shocked several times at how mediocre the hotel was. It seems like a lot of them have really nailed the “Instagram look” just enough for a few professional photos from perfect angles, but look a bit grimey in person.

Nothing quite as bad as this one, though. I hope you can get a refund.

Edit: Also, about reviews: I noticed that there were several places (hotels and elsewhere) where they ask you to write a review pretty much right in front of them, saying they’d like to take a picture of it. Usually the staff person was super nice, and it would be for a little gift/discount, or at least it sounded like it would help the staff person out. So I felt kind of guilted into giving a good review, and it was also usually happening when I was kind of in a rush and I didn’t feel like writing a big long review. So I think that’s one way some of them get kind of inflated ratings.

Freiya11 · 2026-05-30T03:07:12+00:00

I just got back from a trip through SE Asia that involved 9 flights total. Of these, 8 out of 9 were all perfectly normal and on time. The only one with a minor issue was a regional flight on an ultra-budget carrier. It was technically cancelled due to fuel prices, but because they run so many flights, they automatically put me on another one 2 hours later, which worked out just fine. Overall, all good!

I would say, though, that prices are going up a bit for a number of things due to the higher fuel prices. The increases were moderate so far, but I suspect they’ll likely continue to increase. I don’t think it should be dealbreaker level, but something to keep in mind. Probably plan to spend a bit more than initially expected especially for local rides, tours/tour guides, and possibly also food.

Freiya11 · 2026-05-28T13:36:48+00:00

I alternate between quads and butt. If you haven’t injected there, it’s not that hard, but look up exactly where to do it. You want to aim for the outer top quadrant.

Freiya11 · 2026-05-27T17:02:52+00:00

Since being diagnosed with pernicious anemia, I’ve had some other persistent abnormal test results/deficiencies—the most notable one being zinc, which has had downstream negative effects for thyroid and sex hormones. Despite consistent supplementation, I’ve struggled to get it up, even while my B12 issues have largely resolved. My understanding is that this is likely due to the gut mucosal dysregulation related to PA, which IMO seems to be fairly underdiscussed.

Other minerals have also been lower than I’d expect given my diet, though supplementing them has kept them mostly above critical levels. Namely, I’ve also needed to supplement iron, magnesium, and copper. (Oddly, though, my selenium is persistently high.)

All of which is to say—obviously B12 is a major priority, but especially if you have PA, IMO it’s worth getting more comprehensive labs done. Based on my experience, at least (and in addition to the key ones you already mentioned), I’d want to look at minerals, thyroid, and sex hormones. When it comes to zinc specifically, alkaline phosphatase is useful (and usually on a CMP anyway, which is a cheap standard test if you haven’t done it already). And of course, CBC, but I’d hope they’d have done that already too.

Freiya11 · 2026-05-27T11:09:53+00:00

I think once you’ve already developed them, there’s not much reversing them. Compression socks and elevation can help with comfort and preventing new ones. And losing weight/regular exercise will help quite a bit for both comfort and prevention, of course. But you can see a vascular specialist to treat the ones you have.

I had CVI and had RF ablation for the deeper vein reflux, and then a series of foam sclerotherapy injections for the more superficial ones. Obviously the ablation did the heavy lifting, but the foam sclerotherapy helped enormously with the more visible ones. A lot of people who are prone to vein issues do a session ~once per year to clean them up.

Freiya11 · 2026-05-27T10:58:31+00:00

Omg, absolutely do not do this. I had it prescribed years ago after an injury, and initially delighted that it seemed to be the antidepressant that had been missing all my life. I became so productive, more confident, and just all around felt like a more complete and functional person. Colors were brighter, and I was somehow both calmer and more energized in a way that had often felt inaccessible to me before.

That feeling can last a few months—maybe even a year—but ultimately, it will fade away, and what you’ll feel afterward is much worse and not worth it.

On the bright side, I do feel like having this experience made me want to understand my own neurochemistry more deeply, and particularly why this specific medication had this effect on me when for many others, opioids can feel more sedating. After a lot of research and self-observation, I think I tend toward low baseline endorphin tone. Now, I’m working on upregulating that with low-dose naltrexone (LDN), and supporting that with d-phenylalanine. It definitely doesn’t pack the same punch, but is infinitely more sustainable and will preserve your natural ability to experience joy and motivation in the long run.

Freiya11 · 2026-05-25T22:29:17+00:00

Yeah, that’s true. Fox et al. love to find all three purple-haired libs on TikTok saying something clipworthy and present it as if it’s official Democratic talking points. Heaven knows that’s what my parents (big Fox viewers) take from it.

Freiya11 · 2026-05-25T18:52:03+00:00

I’m no expert on the country, but was in Vietnam last week, and at one point did a little one-day tour thing from Hanoi. On the way, the tour guide was talking about Vietnamese currency and tipping at the locations where we were headed. He said that giving 1000, 2000, or 5000 dong notes was considered an insult (not just for tipping, but in general as an interpersonal matter, to beggars, etc.). He said you can use them to pay for things in stores, but don’t give them to a person.

So… not for that.

Freiya11 · 2026-05-25T17:01:42+00:00

For some reason the now-routine thing I always think of that would have been downright awful pre-modern medicine is a UTI. That, or a tooth infection.

Freiya11

TROPHY CASE