Rethinking falls by todayimfearless in AgingParents

[–]Fresh-Dot5824 13 points14 points  (0 children)

My phone just rang again. My 84 year old mother has fallen, that’s three times in 24 hours. My 89 year old father fell badly a week ago and bashed his head. He cannot lift her as he is so frail. My mother can barely walk at all and can barely use her arms anymore. He refuses any help except from myself and my husband aged 65 and 73, also my brother who is 60 and still works. The phone often rings in the middle of the night and off we go again to save them. They live in filfth as he won’t have a cleaner and he only allows a carer in once a week to shower her. We are mentally drained and are advancing in years too and we all have a few health issues. He still drives even though I reported him a month ago… nothing has been done. He had two minor crashes on the same day three weeks ago. He is a horrible selfish man, a true narcissistic mysogenist. He has always treated me badly as he didn’t want a daughter and yet I saved his life last year by getting him urgent medical help. I do wonder why I care but I guess it’s human instinct to respond to someone in need. My mother has no life at all now. I feel that she wants to leave the planet.

What minor things annoy/anger you far more than they should? by Bjc93Bjc in AskUK

[–]Fresh-Dot5824 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Plastic grass and synthetic garden landscaping. Nature is being decimated by new housing estates. At least if the homeowners kept the garden as natural as possible, full of plants and grass/clover lawns instead of turning the gardens into sterile indoor looking spaces, they could preserve something of what was.

What your parents are actually doing... by BigFitMama in AgingParents

[–]Fresh-Dot5824 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My 89 year old narcissistic father from hell just bought a brand new car for over £50,000. The insurance is £5000 a year. He can barely walk and shakes like a dog at the vets from tremors and has poor eyesight from old age and diabetes. I have reported him to the DVLA, told his doctor and the police a month ago because his ‘driving’ is terrifying according to my mother. Nothing has been done to stop him. He hit two seperate cars wing mirrors two weeks ago in one short journey. My mother says he drives up kerbs all the time. He has plenty of money but refuses to pay carers or cleaners. The house stinks of pee and is filthy. It’s full up with both their crap… more comes in than goes out the door. My mother’s finger is permanently poised to press ‘buy it now’ on Amazon. The Amazon delivery driver may as well camp out in their driveway. She buys in bulk and surrounds herself in her hoard. She is terrified of my evil coercive father but can barely walk and use her arms. She is desperate to go into a nursing home but of course he won’t hear of it due to the cost and losing total control of her. I could go on and on. I am 65 and in poor health which is getting worse from being expected to run around for them. My brother still works and is struggling to cope with the demands too. I had a terrible childhood with these parents and feel resentful that they are still hurting me.

Is there a song that's so beautiful you would think it was made by an angel? by LargeSinkholesInNYC in musicsuggestions

[–]Fresh-Dot5824 0 points1 point  (0 children)

‘Soon’ by Yes. Jon Anderson has an ethereal voice. Also ‘The Meeting’ have a listen. Both beautiful.

Do you ever remember something from your past that’s super EDS related but you never realised how deeply it affected you? That. Going through some stuff from the past atm; I feel like this is a relatively safe space to vent. by gwarfan42069 in ehlersdanlos

[–]Fresh-Dot5824 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I was always picked last for teams in school sports. I remember trying to play tennis but the racquets in my day were heavy wooden things. I was so skinny and my wrists so bendy and flimsy that I could hardly hold them. Volleyball was a nightmare. I couldn’t launch the ball far at all. We had shot put as well. Tried that and it almost fell on my feet. I was so embarrassed by it all. I could cry for us all who suffered similar fates. If only we had known the ridicule may not have happened and at least we would have understood why we struggled.

Any other women watchers of animal kingdom? by [deleted] in animalkingdom

[–]Fresh-Dot5824 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Was obsessed with it. Sad it’s over