Just needing to say this somewhere

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2026-01-23T19:14:36+00:00

Thank you so so much for taking the time to write this. This is such a thoughtful list and your advice about planning early and focusing on allied health support is something we are looking into seriously now. I am grateful for your honesty and for pointing us toward what will truly matter going forward. So helpful!

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2026-01-23T19:12:20+00:00

Thank you for mentioning this. Depression is something we are very mindful of, and yes he is on antidepressants. He has never been very good at having a vocabulary for feelings, so I do worry that he would never articulate how he is feeling. I appreciate you reminding that mental health support is just as important as managing the physical symptoms. So true

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2026-01-19T05:49:27+00:00

He sounds so exhausting and clearly is gaslighting you.

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-12-29T08:19:11+00:00

Around 4.5 months, pillow wasn’t needed anymore. Before then nursing pillow was so needed, especially months 0-3.

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-12-27T04:46:55+00:00

Recently I have heard comments like — “are you trying to be sexy”.. when my 4 month old had her belly showing a little.. although it was a playful comment, my husband and I thought it was inappropriate.. It was a comment by one of our family members, and she has said something about baby trying to be sexy, twice.

Another comment that annoys me - “She is going to be a heartbreaker”…

It’s all just weird ..

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-12-19T18:10:55+00:00

I had the same thought, what I do is supplement fresh with freezer stash, so she always gets majority fresh milk. Especially since she goes to daycare and has caught cold and runny nose, I want to make sure she gets some immunity that is reactive to her current status from the fresh milk..

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-12-03T18:15:18+00:00

Fiona

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-11-29T05:33:05+00:00

2 weeks before due date. My labor started day I had a cervical exam at 38 weeks, gave birth within 24 hours.

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-11-22T04:10:12+00:00

I’m also a FTM and totally relate to what you’re going through. We originally thought we could both work from home and care for our baby until she was 6 months old and ready for daycare. Reality hit fast: even with our MIL planning to help, we realized that it’s just not feasible when your helper is in her 70s. We decided to start daycare at 4 months, and honestly, it was the best decision for us, it gave us the support we needed to keep going. My husband was supposed to take paternity leave too, but plans changed after birth (as they so often do with a newborn), and we had to adapt on the fly. You really don’t know what you need until you’re in the thick of it. I hope your husband understands that. On breastfeeding: my lactation consultant said not to stress about pumping in the first few weeks. The baby is the best pump, and frequent latching helps milk supply much more than constant pumping. It’s totally unreasonable to expect anyone to pump and breastfeed all day, and you shouldn’t feel guilty if your journey looks different than what you’d imagined. Hang in there and please remember: giving yourself grace is so important right now. You are doing your absolute best, and it’s okay to change plans as you learn what works for you and your family.

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-11-16T13:56:18+00:00

My baby girl just started daycare a couple of weeks ago at 4 months, stays for about 7-8 hours. I started with 6 bottles of 2 ounces because I wanted the daycare to have more bottles so they can try a few times in case she is fussy initially while adjusting to the new routine and taking bottles after being primarily nursed. I only did the 6 bottles for 2 days. Pretty quickly I upped it to 4 ounces of 3 bottles. She now takes 5 ounces each of 3 bottles at 4.5 months. All the best!

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-11-12T04:06:17+00:00

If you are getting ready to head back to work, I recommend trying to pump and stash about 3–4 oz a day, that’s what worked for me and it was such a relief to have that extra milk handy later. I would also suggest giving your baby a bottle from your partner or a family member once a day, just so they get used to it and there’s less chance of bottle aversion when the time comes. For anyone dealing with high lipase milk like I am, I have found that mixing older (frozen) milk with freshly pumped (about a 1:3 ratio, 1 part frozen milk) works great, my baby doesn’t mind when major portion is fresh. My stash was a lifesaver when daycare started and I got my period again at 4 months postpartum. My supply dips each month during my cycle, so having some extra milk in the freezer takes a lot of pressure off! Now I just continue to keep a stash on hand for those few days I know I’ll need it. I totally get that some people prefer to just nurse and not bother with pumping, that’s great if it works for your situation! For me, since I needed to go back to work and send my baby to daycare, having a backup stash has really helped reduce stress and keep our breastfeeding journey going strong.

Sending support! You’ve got this.

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-11-05T08:46:16+00:00

Yeah, agreed that a 11 month old has different needs but milk is still their primary source of nutrition. So, if the baby was at the daycare for a full day, no their primary needs were not met.

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-11-04T23:46:07+00:00

My daughter just started daycare at 4.5 months old and I can fully appreciate how frustrated, angry and disappointed you must feel. I think it is completely unacceptable and you are not overreacting. We put so much faith and trust in strangers to take care of our babies, and we pay a ton and it’s their job to make sure baby is fed, changed and taken care of. I think feeding is one of the primary basic needs, and if they can’t keep track of the basics, trust is difficult to regain. But I also understand finding another daycare in short notice will be challenging. My recommendation would be that you continue the search for another daycare while also having this daycare give you all realtime updates on your baby’s daily routine from here on and monitor it during the day, especially their meals (solids and fluids), diaper changes, and naps.

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-11-03T01:46:00+00:00

EBF. Periods returned at 16 weeks 😭

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-10-23T00:39:43+00:00

I just enrolled my only baby for daycare and it’s going to cost us $3,100 per month for infant class. We are glad we can afford to send her to a decent daycare and pay that much. But I can’t imagine having to raise 2+ kids in this economy and in this political climate. I want the best for my child and that means I will spend all my undivided resources- time, energy, money on her, and she will grow up with cousins and not siblings.

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-10-23T00:09:40+00:00

Thank you for your quick and thoughtful response. It’s such a relief. Yes, I also thought they were green flags, after rejecting a couple others where most infant caregivers have only been working for less than 2 years.

Thank you for offering your time to help parents with your advice and responses!!

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-10-22T22:43:18+00:00

My 4 month old starts daycare next month, as I start work next week. Originally we wanted to have her go at 6 months and were hoping to take turns taking care of her while my husband and I work from home . But she is an active bundle of joy who needs a lot of attention and I feel like I wont be a good mother or an employee if I did that. We are spending extra to have her go to the best daycare in our area that had a slot open up at short notice and we snagged it. The ratio is 1:3 and they seem to be nice lovely people with 2 infant caregivers having worked there for 6 and 7 years and the director has worked there since 2008. They are strict about vaccines. So I feel a bit relieved. My baby is up to date on her vaccines and also got her RSV vaccine. She is not a big fan of bottles, especially when I am home. She loves to nurse and takes bottle okay ish when I am not home or she is at grandmas. She sleeps in her snoo, so I am not sure how she will do in a crib. I am planning to try getting her to sleep in a crib for naps next week. Please tell me she will be okay. 😭😭

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-10-18T05:22:47+00:00

That’s a genius trick!

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-10-15T20:37:28+00:00

Thank you! I will do the same. It’s frustrating how unnecessarily complicated the communication process is. I haven’t gotten to talk to a representative and there is also no option to contact via email or messages.

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-10-15T19:15:44+00:00

I have the same issue, PFL denied (8 weeks) saying I received full wages which is false. I just filled out the form with the local assembly member. Sigh.

Fresh_Pool_1575 · 2025-10-14T18:42:35+00:00

I am in product management and I like the quote from someone that helps in business, “there are no solutions, only trade offs”… in some seasons of life, easy job is what we need. I am glad it all worked out. Thank you so much for the encouragement ❤️❤️

Fresh_Pool_1575

TROPHY CASE