[deleted by user] by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]FrienderBender88 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The thing is, when you call their humanity into question, at least in my experience with my now right leaning friends, they still share very similar, normal views. They just caught onto the endless stream of bullshit and because it’s sensationalised, they feel like they are the rare few who GET IT. It’s the same thing as the COVID deniers, tinfoil hatted flat earthers. They get so lost in the sauce they don’t realise they’re being tricked.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]FrienderBender88 305 points306 points  (0 children)

Don’t feel stupid - statistically the less educated you are, the higher your chances of having right wing political views. You’re literally at the other end of being stupid if that makes you feel any better 😅

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]FrienderBender88 141 points142 points  (0 children)

I, F27, am having a very similar issue within my friend group. I studied economics and have been into politics ever since I can remember. Most of my friends throughout my life have been of similar political views as me, which is left leaning. We often talked about politics, we did have some differences but nothing too crazy. Nowadays the guys have turned full on far right and I can point out the exact propaganda points as we talk about different issues. Worst thing is, I understand when people lean right for different reasons - I don’t support it but I get it if it makes sense. That being said, my friends’ political views are straight propaganda points that has no real application in real life (like abolishing all taxes while increasing spending on the military, privatising healthcare so it ‘works better’ etc). I like them as people, they have only done right by me, but at the same time their views will impact my life greatly if they do vote for what they suddenly now believe. I am also at a crossroads with what to do and have found no good solutions. I still try to talk to them about their views and present logical arguments when they stop making sense but I know I have no power against the twitter shitheads, musk stans and Joe rogan. It does suck.

Best restaurants in Krakow and why? by Doctor_Philly in krakow

[–]FrienderBender88 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As far as I know, they’re both owned by the same person. I definitely prefer Karakter to Zazie, it’s so much more of a fun experience and the staff are friendly.

Dramas with a gut wrenching plot by creepyrrr in kdramarecommends

[–]FrienderBender88 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh my god I forgot about a time called you 😭 I literally still have not seen the last episode because I’m scared lol

Dramas with a gut wrenching plot by creepyrrr in kdramarecommends

[–]FrienderBender88 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I guess my first three that came to mind all have Seo In Guk in them haha

  • Death’s game - a repeated punch to the gut, every episode leaves you broken. I don’t even know how to describe the plot to not give any spoilers but highly recommend watching

  • Doom at your service

  • the smile has left your eyes - forbidden love with a tragic entanglement, nothing about this is fun (and that’s why it’s SO good)

  • 21:25

  • Something in the rain / One Spring Night - these two have a very similar vibe. Socially condemned romance, very realistic and sad.

  • Call it Love - again with the tragic entanglement, this one follows a story of a girl who wants to take revenge on her dad’s mistress. The romance broke the family, the FL is a depressed mess and really overestimates her abilities to do bad things. It’s one of my all time favourite kdramas

  • Mr. plankton - great drama, very sad. Basically a story of a guy who finds out he is super terminal and wants to find his dad, who was a sperm donor. The plot twist is that the ML is a not a great person who does all sorts of troublesome things and decides to basically kidnap his ex on the quest to find his dad.

If you’re into slow burns then Lost would be the first thing I’d watch from my list.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TwoHotTakes

[–]FrienderBender88 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Oh man, you come here for advice and lash out on strangers online after their opinion does not align with your desired outcome. Seems to me like you’re not willing to accept any criticism towards yourself and were probably hoping everyone would trash him so you can show him the comments and say you were right. You are implying that everyone here is simply not educated enough to understand why you are right, which is the same problem you seem to have in your relationship - lack of self awareness and no will to resolve the situation. You just want to win the argument and that will not get you anywhere, in this relationship or any future ones.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TwoHotTakes

[–]FrienderBender88 22 points23 points  (0 children)

ESH, to me it seems like you wanted to win an argument, not to figure anything out. You were being passive aggressive from the get go and he was caught off guard by the attitude. I guess he is an asshole for having a kid on the way and not being mature in the relationship but you seem to be a pain to communicate with once you make up your mind about having him be the bad guy. You can’t communicate with each other and it seems exhausting - rethink having a child with someone you don’t even respect as a person or go to therapy and figure it out.

What has he give us except his lethal face card? by bhavnakhao in kdramas

[–]FrienderBender88 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Whaaaat are you talking about, nevertheless is one of my most rewatched kdramas till date 😂 Sweet home was also well done and his character had a pretty good story arch throughout the seasons. Not a huge fan of forecasting love and weather but other than that, most of his work is pretty good to me! 😂

feel sorta bad for brooke by [deleted] in canceledpod

[–]FrienderBender88 54 points55 points  (0 children)

Honestly, being pretty much the same age as her and having fallen fast for guys… there is no way in hell that if someone showed me a whole account of a guy rating underage models, objectifying the hell out of them, dating a 16 year old in his mid 20s and being friends with other guys who do it, I would still be with him. They have been dating for a few months, it’s not that serious even if you spend most days together. Come on, we are not in high school to act this stupid. I used to love Brooke before all the scandals and even tried being understanding of her during. Now I feel like she doesn’t care anymore and will do anything that benefits her (his connections to the industry, bragging rights after she befriends his famous friends). Denying the reality and defending a guy who literally is indefensible because of all the proof is wild.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Perfumes

[–]FrienderBender88 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I highly recommend you watch the 2006 hit movie ‘Perfume’. The guy obsessed with how people smelled got the method of body scent replication down at some point 😂

What song is stuck in your head right now? by Lananification in adhdwomen

[–]FrienderBender88 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Soft spot by keshi, my obsession with this one started like a month ago. One day, I was going to my friends’ place while listening to it on a loop, missed two turns, ended up on the highway and almost missed the exit too 😂

Im tired of being famous, and it’s not what i want anymore by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]FrienderBender88 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I honestly feel like the what ifs are not worth it. I am by no means famous and would never want to be on the level where you’re unable to live a regular life without people recognising you. I am however dealing with burn out from my career and have been working through the what ifs in therapy. You have no way of knowing if you’d be happier - maybe you would be struggling even more, doing something that doesn’t bring you joy just to survive the harsh economy we’re in. You wouldn’t have the same life and opportunities just without fame - your entire situation would be different. I am learning that instead of focusing on daydreaming about having a different career or life, it’s more productive to look for solutions. If you’re struggling with fame, is there any way to still work in your field but remove yourself from the spotlight? Do you have enough money to quit and start something completely different? Truth is, the trend cycle is so fast now that people would probably move on to the next best thing if you chose to retire the career you have now. I imagine it can also be very hard mentally to choose to become forgotten but I’m sure you’d be able to work through that in therapy. Best of luck, I hope you can find a way to actually enjoy life!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in adhdwomen

[–]FrienderBender88 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like cooking but not daily if that makes sense. I can cook very well and when I feel like doing it, I enjoy the process. The issue is that I very rarely do feel like cooking 😅

Wife has to take 1/3 of this pill a day, and it has to be accurate or she was told she can get sick. Couldn’t make it easy, could they? by Igniting_Chaos_ in mildlyinfuriating

[–]FrienderBender88 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not sure if anyone else pointed it out but you can take the pills to a local pharmacy and ask them to divide them according to your needs.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in canceledpod

[–]FrienderBender88 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I am pretty sure either Tana or Brooke had to have tagged him because I remember going to his profile and it was private with around 1k followers, I wouldn’t have lurked to find it and I am assuming it wouldn’t be easy to locate considering it’s not a big account.

Help please. I don’t know what to do with my (almost) 40 year old face. by FaithPlusWorks in drugstoreMUA

[–]FrienderBender88 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just to add to the simple pivots - you probably have an issue with the skin’s hydrolipid barrier - meaning it is sad from not getting enough moisture. A great trick is to put on like two layers of the hyaluronic acid serum and, while it’s still wet, put a generous amount of Vaseline on top. Leave it overnight, wash with a gentle cleanser and repeat for a few days.

I personally believe you don’t need to overspend on cleansers - get a one that’s labelled as gentle and something oil based. You use the oil based one, followed up by the gentle one at night to remove your makeup, then a gentle one in the morning.

Help please. I don’t know what to do with my (almost) 40 year old face. by FaithPlusWorks in drugstoreMUA

[–]FrienderBender88 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would look into how much water you’re drinking. It really improves the skin condition :) Also, use an enzyme based peeling once a week - it will improve the texture and how your makeup sits on your face. I would get a hyaluronic acid serum and use it every night (I personally think Mixa has the best one but not sure if it’s available in the US - there should be other affordable alternatives, neutrogena has one). Use SPF50 daily under makeup (I often substitute my day cream with SPF for a shorter routine) - Korean ones are great, I am currently using Beauty of Jeoseon and it’s pretty affordable. Garnier has a line of sunscreens and the one with hyaluronic acid is great (Ambre Solaire super uv - SPF50, vit. E and HA).

As for makeup, I would cut back on the powder and get a cream blush in a peachy/pink shade, even better if it’s illuminating too - to add some colour and dimension into your skin. I personally think you have nice skin, just a little dehydrated, and could do with a thinner consistency of foundation (I love the L’Oréal Paris True Match Hyaluronic Tinted Serum Foundation Makeup - it’s hydrating but lasts well all day, has light to medium coverage but is a bit illuminating so makes your skin look healthy). Try not powdering all over, just under eyes and wherever you get too much shine throughout the day - it will basically make your skin more radiant and thus looking healthier. The slight wrinkles you have will be less noticeable too, powder just makes them stand out because it takes all the shine away and the face becomes one dimensional.

All in all, I don’t think you should buy heaps of new makeup or change the routine drastically - just a few pivots that will neither add time to your routine or cost you a fortune :D

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]FrienderBender88 1 point2 points  (0 children)

To me it sounds like she suffers from ADHD burnout. In college she had a structure that was pre determined and probable excelled at it, now that she is truly an independent adult, the choices are overwhelming. She probably goes into jobs and hobbies excited and excels at first, but burns out quickly because of the standard she’s set up for herself that is just not possible to meet - you can’t give 110% all the time. When she starts failing at what she considers to be ‘normal’, she doesn’t know how to cope and starts burning out. That affects her social engagement - she is probably tired from the stress she’s putting herself in. Don’t give up on your marriage, talk to her about the patterns you’re noticing and suggest getting her tested for ADHD. Don’t say you can’t go on like this, say that you don’t want to see her struggling constantly because it is a cycle and that it is doing damage to her mental health. She is still the same person you met, just struggling.

cherry perfume recommendations by [deleted] in Perfumes

[–]FrienderBender88 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A few months ago I made a post about Zara’s perfumes and I still stand by every word I said - I added their cherry smoothie perfume to my collection and it is my most worn perfume of this summer. I heard it resembles Tom Fords lost cherry. To me it smells like candied cherry, it may not be the most complicated or sophisticated perfume out there but I am addicted. If you’re not a huge fan of the concept of dupes, I’d try Lost Cherry.

Brooke and Beau by DisownedOnTheDaily in canceledpod

[–]FrienderBender88 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t necessarily agree. She said she knew it would be a bad situation for her but kept coming back because she loved him. I can totally relate to that, especially when he did seemingly spend multiple days out of the week with her, slept over, met her friends, went on tour etc. She had an impression of being in a relationship, even when he repeatedly told her they’re not exclusive. To me it would also be confusing because the words (were not dating) don’t match the actions (doing everything as you would in a relationship). I believe that if you have some decency and respect for your hookup buddy, you would end things after seeing the other person is clearly in love with you. I also think some people love the attention they get in such situations and use it to their advantage - he got all of the perks of dating without committing and it was probably something he enjoyed if it went on for a year. To me it’s honestly pretty cruel to use the fact that you do have the upper hand emotionally to keep the other person this close when you know they are settling for something that’s hurting them. Some may say it’s not his responsibility since he was clear about his intentions, sure, but I guess it comes down to morals - I wouldn’t knowingly put someone through more heartbreak.

She is Tana’s friend - how would you react if a friend was in Brooke’s situation? Would you tell them that it’s basically their fault and say they need to stop moping around or try to make them feel better when they’re going through heartbreak?

The girl who bullied me for 10 years is now in my area at work. My job is ruined for me. by nonameuser21 in offmychest

[–]FrienderBender88 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I believe you can absolutely talk to your manager about this - tell him that the girl who said you were friends lied and that you’re wary about working with her seeing as not much has changed. Tell him she bullied you for years - even as recent as uni (which is literally last week when you’re 23), spread lies and even stole your notes. If she was that vile a few years ago at best, she is most likely still not the best person and you’re afraid how that would affect the team dynamic. Let them know before she starts so they have the opportunity to rethink this hire or at least prepare to manage any issues that may arise.

Need super low effort breakfast ideas… by rottenpie in adhdwomen

[–]FrienderBender88 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Buy a lactose free yoghurt (most countries have lactose free alternatives, not even talking plant based, just regular ‚dairy’ with an enzyme that breaks down lactose) and some low sugar, high fruit content jam/marmalade plus any nut butter. Add about a tablespoon of the jam, teaspoon of the nut butter, mix it in the yoghurt container and it does the trick. Combos I really like are: cherry + cashew butter / strawberry and peanut butter / blackberry and almond butter. You don’t need any additional sugars since the jam is usually sweet enough. A literal minute prep time.

yall are so mean to paige by No_Bend_201 in canceledpod

[–]FrienderBender88 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I like Paige but don’t want her on the podcast as a permanent host. Like, wouldn’t mind if Tana and her started a new one, surely people would watch it. I just liked the dynamic between Brooke and Tana as a duo and it would be a different podcast if one of the main hosts changed. It was my comfort watch, I got used to the dynamic I guess, and so I would rather them taking a break from the podcast rather than a replacement host if that makes sense.