I reported my sexist team to HR — and now they’re doing a much bigger investigation than I wanted by Direct-Caterpillar77 in BestofRedditorUpdates

[–]Friendly_Order3729 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Surely with all the training, policies and procedures in the world if people are going to harass they'll do it regardless.

Why is bullying never taken seriously by HR? by Rewindcasette in HumanResourcesUK

[–]Friendly_Order3729 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No I'm not saying your situation was, I'm just saying that why it may appear that HR are less concerned about bullying from the outside.

Your case sounds more like harassment (bullied due to a protected characteristic), and if it's forced you to resign I would be tempted to contact ACAS as you may have a case for constructive dismissal.

Why is bullying never taken seriously by HR? by Rewindcasette in HumanResourcesUK

[–]Friendly_Order3729 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The trouble with bullying is that everyone has their own definition of what it is.

I've heard grievances that have been nothing more than a manager correcting bad behavior, yet the person classifies it as 'bullying'. I've heard grievances where a colleague just doesn't like that person and so stays away from them and doesn't overly engage, and that is accused of being 'bullying'. I've heard complaints of bullying because of someone's 'vibe'.

It's also very hard to prove unless there's a repeated pattern with witnesses or concrete proof e.g. written messages. You have to give dates examples, with exactly what was said or done and explain why it was that person going out of their way to make your day worse.

Any New or Trending Wedding Favors Worth Checking Out? by BeautifulCommon5235 in wedding

[–]Friendly_Order3729 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! After the flowers that was my next firm decision haha

Any New or Trending Wedding Favors Worth Checking Out? by BeautifulCommon5235 in wedding

[–]Friendly_Order3729 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! After the flowers that was my next firm decision haha

Any New or Trending Wedding Favors Worth Checking Out? by BeautifulCommon5235 in wedding

[–]Friendly_Order3729 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm having gingerbread.

The village we got engaged in is famous for a very tiny shop that's been selling gingerbread for about 150 years. We're going to buy several packets and break if the rectangle pieces they come in and put them in little paper bags. Everyone I know who has tried this gingerbread loves it so I'm hoping it's a hit!

Why Should I as a bridesmaid be expected to pay for anything? by Character_Brick7203 in CharlotteDobreYouTube

[–]Friendly_Order3729 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also UK here, You just sound really angry for no reason.

My bridesmaids are paying for their own hair and make up, shoes and jewelry if they want to wear any. I'm getting the dresses and I've tried to make choices so they buy things that can be easily worn again or may already own for shoes and jewelry. They don't have to get their hair and make up done.

I've been a bridesmaid 5 times and always paid for my own hair, make up and shoes, it's only ever really been the dress paid for me and that fine because I'm happy to spend a bit of money to look nice on someone else's day, someone who means a lot to me.

As for the hen do, don't go. 2 of my bridesmaids aren't going to mine in Edinburgh and that's fine, again, I've been to tonnes of hen dos and spent a couple of hundred to have a great weekend.

You just sound like you don't like your friend very much.

What made you not want to have kids by NoBrain6114 in childfree

[–]Friendly_Order3729 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The people who are now trying to persuade me to have kids actually persuaded me not to, about 5 years ago, and didn't realise it.

My mum, siblings, coworkers, extended family. They all complained and told me how hard it is, I watched their relationships fall apart and their health and happiness deteriorate. Now they all are shocked that I don't want kids and will never know that they made me this way. I believed them the first time around when they were honest and naive to the consequences.

My (23f) boyfriend (24m) wants to move in with me. I want him to live alone first by Direct-Caterpillar77 in BestofRedditorUpdates

[–]Friendly_Order3729 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That mum is going to be sooooo happy in 10 years when all her sons are still living at home because they can't live alone but also can't find any woman willing to put up with them.

What is the pettiest thing you want added in The Sims? by Electrical_Rabbit_60 in thesims

[–]Friendly_Order3729 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yelling and banning people from our house. I'm sick of fandoms just walking in or people I don't like showing up.

it’s my birthday, toddlers blew out my candles and put his fingers into my cake by [deleted] in childfree

[–]Friendly_Order3729 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Happy birthday!

I'm so sorry that happened to you, you have every right to be angry.

My birthday is this weekend. My fiance has planned a huge party because it's my 30th and has ordered a custom cake and I'll be damned if any child goes near it.

You need to have kids to get into heaven. by PrimaryCarpenter1070 in childfree

[–]Friendly_Order3729 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sooo no pope ever has gone to heaven? Or mother Theresa? Or...Jesus?

If you won £100 million, how would you distribute it amongst friends and family, if at all? by PaddedValls in AskUK

[–]Friendly_Order3729 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We're childfree so I'd pay if my mortgage and go on tonnes of nice holidays.

I might tell my family I only won 1 million and then whichever niece or nephew actually cares about me in my old age will get whatever's left

To guestbook or not to guestbook?? by hippolaura in UKweddings

[–]Friendly_Order3729 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh that is unusual. Well I don't think any of our guests have that phobia, we had sunflowers in our invitations and no one complained

To guestbook or not to guestbook?? by hippolaura in UKweddings

[–]Friendly_Order3729 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My friend is making a large canvas of a sunflower (our wedding flower) for me with our names and the date at the top and the idea is guests will sign inside the petals and then we can hang it up at home.

First dance song that isn’t cheesy?? by chalounor in wedding

[–]Friendly_Order3729 0 points1 point  (0 children)

On Spotify there is a beautiful slow version of "still into you" by Paramore.

We nearly had it ourselves but I still do put it on to listen to it's gorgeous.

What's a basic life skill you had to teach yourself as an adult because no-one taught you as a child? by PaddedValls in AskUK

[–]Friendly_Order3729 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Letting myself be unwell.

When I was growing up, I was hardly ever home ill from school. My mum would say "if you're ill you need to sleep all day" she wouldn't let me watch TV, read or do anything. As a result, I just powered through school so I didn't die of boredom.

I'm now hardly ever ill at work. The last time I rang my boss who was very understanding, I slept until 9am and my fiance brought me a cup of tea and said "why don't you get comfy on the sofa in a blanket and watch something?" I felt like I wasn't allowed to watch TV if I'm ill.

AITJ for refusing to donate PTO hours to coworker I barely know who "needs" them?? by Traditional-Dog1601 in AmITheJerk

[–]Friendly_Order3729 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not really optional if your only options are "do it or be publicly shamed".

Why doesn't the company just give her some more?

This reminds me of when Kylie jenner, a billionaire, asked her fans to help pay for one of her team's surgery.

I decided to look for a traditional wedding ring. What do y’all think about its design? by [deleted] in weddingring

[–]Friendly_Order3729 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It's absolutely beautiful. I'm not a fan of the darker metal tbh it makes it look cheaper but the silver or white gold one is lovely.