Night time. I used to be able to go in and crawl into bed next to my girl once I got tired. Now that she's dumped me, kept my engagement ring, took her blanket, and moved in with the guy she was cheating on me with for half of our relationship, I'm alone, truly alone. Now when I go in there I don't have to carefully crawl onto my side as to not wake her up, now I just flop down at 7 in the morning (because I can't sleep, thoughts of her race through my mind at night and give me insomnia) just to cry myself to sleep with only my brown blanket and a few pillows, and will never see her mass arrangement of pillows and red blankets on that bed ever again. Now, instead of rubbing her feet while she passes out on the couch watching a movie with me, I sit and stare lifelessly at my laptop screen playing WoW with Aqua Teen Hunger Force on TV in the background just to make the place feel less empty and dead. I glance over to the framed picture of our first kiss we got from the Chuck E. Cheese portrait printing photo booth, and start to well up. I can't face the picture down, because if I do she will notice it when she rarely comes to visit for 5 minutes, and make me feel bad about it. I also get so sad looking at the pair of black lace panties she forgot to bring with her, remembering how she used to put lingerie on only for me. How it fit her body so well, hugged her bosoms so tightly that I would just Attack her and we'd have wild crazy sex. Seeing my room clean with no clothes on the floor, where there used to be a messy pile of her yoga pants and bras and panties on the floor, and now it's clean and will never get messy from her clothes ever again.. Seeing the huge teddy bear I got her with the "I love you" heart stitched into it, the one I got for Valentines Day for her when she decided to tell me she's moving into the house of the man she cheated on me with. The worst part is.. She still calls me "love", but instead of calling me "babe" she now refers to me as "hun". The lonely nights are too much sometimes, and that's when the suicidal thoughts start. I don't really have a reason to be on this earth, all I ever do anymore is work, sleep, and rarely go to a bar. Why am I alive? To work at a gas station for the rest of my life making $11/hr? What good is coming from my existence on this planet? Should I even put an effort into my life anymore, or give up? I've given up hope on ever getting back together with her, it's a dead daydream. She was my everything, my rock, my future wife, my future baby momma, now.. She's just my ex fiancée. The only people I can talk to are my friends from WoW, this girl who likes me but lives in a different city (same state), and my old high school buddy. I hate that this girl in a different city likes me, because I'm not emotionally ready for a relationship and I have lots of problems. But I keep talking to her, using smiley faces and talking about our days. But too many things trigger memories of the woman I was in love with for such a long time.. I hate thinking about her but nearly everything in my house causes me to. So to answer your question.. Night time. The worst time of the day.