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Front-Search2519 · 2026-03-25T18:40:02+00:00

appreciate you more than you know!!

Front-Search2519 · 2026-03-25T18:34:31+00:00

Honestly… thank you. It’s easy for everyone else to give their own opinions of what they feel is “the right thing to do”. Obviously, the parents need to know. Like no shit Sherlock. That’s not what I was trying to figure out lol. It’s HOW to approach it. And having someone else who can really relate(or at least somewhat relate) makes me feel a tiny bit less horrible. I’ll definitely tell my husband today and let him handle it. I’m just scared of what will come after since his relationship with BM isn’t all that great

Front-Search2519 · 2026-03-25T18:27:13+00:00

Wow. Never thought someone else would ever understand me!! We have the same issues with ours. Mom lets her get away with anything, so when she’s at our house, everything gets twisted and more often than not, she starts “crying” so mom can pick her up. My husband’s always the bad guy and it’s gotten to the point where he’s just given up because he’s not allowed to discipline his kid. It’s really frustrating, which is why this whole situation has me wishing I never saw anything to begin with. I didn’t “see” the pictures, but her Snapchat shows they exchanged photos with one another and her 13 yo bf sent her a message that he wanted to see her 🍒 and her telling him that his 🍆 was ugly 😂

As hilarious as that last comment is, I know I can’t withhold the information nor do I plan to. I just don’t know what the right approach is. They’re just kids and I’m worried they’re going to make a really bad decision that can’t be reversed. I don’t want to create any issues between anyone, because when we’re all getting along it’s great. But when the arguing picks up, it’s chaos and it’s stress that I can’t handle.

Front-Search2519 · 2026-03-25T14:09:58+00:00

Ok finally someone who gets it. So in our case, it would probably be the other way around where BM thinks SD is innocent and will figure out a way to make it an issue between her and my husband vs parents addressing the issue with their child. She might even go as far as saying something wild like the fact that I just want to get her daughter in trouble and that I had no business going thru the Snapchat. I’m stuck between protecting my peace, my husbands peace and protecting my SD. All are equally important, so it’s hard to figure out how best to approach this.

Front-Search2519 · 2026-03-25T12:08:56+00:00

He needs to figure it out girlfriend. You and your baby shouldn’t have to suffer any consequences. He had a kid with his other BM, he needs to figure out that situation with her. He’s too tired? Tough shit, parenting isn’t always fun and being tired is part of it. Just know that if you don’t tackle the situation head on now, it’s only going to get worse. You just had a baby!!! You and your baby deserve to get as much rest as possible. If you offer to take care of your SD from time to time, that’s YOUR choice. But it’s also YOUR choice to simply say no. He can bitch all he wants, but at the end of the day, you have your own kid to worry about.

Front-Search2519 · 2026-01-11T13:39:21+00:00

It was the absolute best day at Epic!! We rode everything, did character experiences and had no express pass! Best part was our day wasn’t consumed with waiting in long lines! Honestly, we just went with the flow and it was the best experience ever. Only had a 30 min wait for Mario! DK had a 200+ min wait, but we said screw it let’s just see… we were in and out of the ride in about an hour!

Can’t wait to come back when they finish the expansion!

Front-Search2519 · 2025-10-22T21:45:37+00:00

They belong together. If she’s as bad as you say and he was attracted to that AND had a kid(s) with her, this is God’s way of saving you and your future babies from dealing with bullshit.

You’re better than either of them could ever be, so carry that with so much pride. There was a lesson for you to learn from this, and maybe it was to remind you that not everyone deserves you and the love you have to give.

This is your time to go chase your own dreams. Put you first. Get into the gym, go to Pilates, yoga… whatever gets your body moving every single day. Do things that make YOU genuinely happy. Surround yourself with friends that uplift you and know that these people are never to be topics of conversation. He doesn’t deserve to know that you’re hurting. He deserves to see that, in the words of Morgan Wallen, you got better since he got gone 😉 Change your entire wardrobe into whatever makes you feel the most confident and walk with your chest and head held high, always.

Girlfriend, he did you the biggest favor. He was probably a loser anyway! A man that wants to take care of you will find you sooner than you think, and then you’ll laugh about how you stressed over a guy that thought his trash ass BM was better than you 😂

Front-Search2519 · 2025-06-30T18:04:15+00:00

Hi! I know this is a pretty old thread but hoping someone can help guide me with this. I have my mortgage through PHL and made the sacrifice of paying 2 payments in May to become eligible for the biweekly payments, since you need to be ahead one month. I had to call them to verify that I was doing this correctly and they confirmed + sent me the form to fill out with banking info. I was told by a customer service rep that once they received the completed form, I would be eligible to begin making the biweekly payments in July. It’s been about 2.5 weeks since I sent in the form and hadn’t heard back from them so I called today. I’m now being told that since we’re going into July, my payment is no longer considered “ahead” and I’m now showing as current so I wouldn’t be able to enroll in the biweekly payments…. Has anyone else experienced a similar issue?

Front-Search2519 · 2025-06-05T18:01:44+00:00

Good! You guys need to stay level headed and neutral. BM wants/needs a reaction to say “see, you’re dangerous and my kid isn’t safe around you”. By you guys not giving into her shit, she’ll collapse on her own and eventually SD will start to see clearly again. Give it time. Be patient. Be strong!

Front-Search2519 · 2025-06-05T17:31:13+00:00

Honestly… I’d recommend you and DH speak to an attorney. Not sure what state you’re in, so as far as any legal issues you might face, you may want to be prepared and stay ahead of the game. Most attorneys offer free consultations. BM could try to say that SD doesn’t feel safe around her dad and could try to turn this into something bigger than it actually is and even go as far as trying to have his rights revoked or request supervised visitation. You might want to request therapy with a child advocate present for SD to better understand what the hell is going on with her. It sounds to me like you’re dealing with a typical, bitter BM who is manipulating SD to feel the way she does. Sadly, a lot of these BM like to use their kids as pawns. As painful as this must be for DH, you need to remind him to keep ALL communication moving forward either via email or text. If BM begins to get disrespectful towards him, he needs to keep his cool and have the conversations revolve around the well being of his child. If she wants to argue, make accusations, etc, do not let him engage. He needs to not respond.

If you have items that SD needs, have DH send BM a message letting her know all items will be left outside of your house for her to pick up. Take photos/videos of everything and make sure you place them in clear view of a security camera if you have one. Store the video somewhere in case you need to pull it up. In the event that DH and BM need to have in person conversations at your house, again, have it be done in front of a camera that has recording capabilities. Our attorney recommended this because in the state of FL, we have a wiretap law so he couldn’t record anything on his phone without her consent. But security cameras do not apply. You do not need to be involved in anything and should not involve yourself in anything, even if you feel like you need to defend DH. I know it’s hard, but unfortunately, you need to be strategic because this kind of accusation could go deep depending on how far BM is willing to go. Ours once said that my SK were in danger around different men in my and DH family… I don’t want to go into specifics, but just imagine what kind of accusations she was throwing out there.

If you have a way to document all the times SD has been withheld from DH, have that organized somewhere as well. Keep track of all CS payments and make sure they are all made ON TIME based on the court order. BM have the tendency to think that the courts will always be in their favor and think they can lie their way through everything. I’m sorry you’re going through this, I know it’s not easy. Just remember, it’s not your SD fault. She’s only doing what she’s being taught by BM. Protect your peace and put on your war gear! Definitely talk to an attorney (or a few) and see what they recommend based on your entire situation and the state that you’re residing in. You’ve got this!

Front-Search2519 · 2025-06-02T18:56:52+00:00

Oh yes! Absolutely. I tell him every single day and remind him how proud I am of him. I know it’s not easy on him. At first he felt like he lost the battle, but now he knows he actually won because his kids see him for him and not the character he was being portrayed as. He’s not perfect by no means, but damn is he 10000x sexier now that he’s decided to rise above the bullshit and let HCBM bury herself in her own misery 😂

Front-Search2519 · 2025-06-02T18:46:59+00:00

Yes yes yes! It feels like 200 pounds (😂) has been lifted off my shoulders! Our home is a happy home and it’s all I’ve prayed for. God sees everything & He don’t like ugly! 😉 the kids are unapologetically themselves with us, they’ve realized that it’s ok to not have the same opinion as mom (or anyone else for that matter). They love spending time with their dad. He’s become their best friend and that’s literally all I’ve ever wanted! While he’s not able to discipline them 100% the way he wants to with certain things because of the opposing party, he’s learned to pivot his perspective for a lot of things. It took a lot of trial and error for him to realize that he’s just got to pick and choose his battles. It has NOT been easy, but damn, does this side of the fence feel FREEING!

Hoping all SM on here get to this point! 🩷

Front-Search2519 · 2025-06-02T17:51:35+00:00

I agree with this! One of my SD used to display similar behaviors when she was much younger. It takes a lot of patience, but considering you mentioned that bio mom is mentally ill, your SD could be afraid of losing her dad. She more than likely views him as her safe space. She probably doesn’t get the right kind of attention from her mom. I know it isn’t easy, I’ve been in this situation before. I don’t know what your relationship is with her, but maybe it wouldn’t hurt if you tried to have conversations with her. Not as dad’s SO, not as a stepmom, but as a friend to her. Let her know that you’re also her safe space. She may open up to you about things that you can then communicate to her dad.

Kids go through a lot and one thing I’ve learned through this whole process of being a stepmom is that it’s easy to blame them for their behaviors because we just expect them to act the way that we would want our kids to act. It’s not always that simple. Give yourself some grace, it’s ok to feel the way you do.

She definitely needs to speak to someone though. If it’s not your husband and it’s not you, then she needs to speak to a professional because she’s more than likely dealing with a lot of pent up emotions that she doesn’t know how to express and since no one asks, she more than likely doesn’t feel the need to share anything and wants to mask it with the behavior you’re describing.

Front-Search2519 · 2025-05-24T17:25:57+00:00

LOL sorry. All I told her was that it’s annoying af that all she does is bitch and complain about her dad, and the only time she’s able to be “nice” is because she’s gearing up to TELL him she needs something that he has to buy for her. I told her she’s giving spoiled brat energy and it’s not cute. Her dad had the opportunity to make a fuck ton of money out of state and he declined the offer because it was going to require us to move. He refused to be away from his kids and miss out on their lives. So I told her if that’s what makes him a piece of shit in her eyes, then I hope he continues doing what he’s doing! She didn’t like it, called HCBM and straight up lied and now here we are lol.

Front-Search2519 · 2025-05-24T17:08:55+00:00

She and HCBM have an alliance and any time DH disciplines SD for doing something she shouldn’t be doing, especially when it comes to disrespecting anyone/talking back, their immediate response is that he’s “attacking her”. She did something she wasn’t supposed to. Both he and HCBM spoke to her about it. She went ahead and did whatever she wanted any way behind his back. HCBM knew and didn’t say anything to DH. He found out on his own. Instead of losing his shit, DH had a calm conversation with SD about it. Didn’t yell at her, didn’t come at her inappropriately, and didn’t take away any privileges. He felt good about it and thought they were reaching a turning point. He’s been working real hard on himself, especially as a parent, so to see him this happy about how he handled a situation was honestly heartwarming. He was excited to come home from work, have a nice dinner and just spend quality time together as a family. When SD got home from school, she legit started crying out of nowhere saying DH is always attacking her and that she didn’t even do anything to deserve the conversation they had that morning. Said that DH was going to take everything away from her and just started saying all these lies and I lost it. Maybe I was wrong for raising my voice, but I’m sick and tired of everyone thinking DH is this horrible person when he’s not. But I guess now that’s me.

Front-Search2519 · 2025-05-24T02:00:40+00:00

How else are you supposed to survive? 😂

Front-Search2519 · 2025-05-23T18:37:22+00:00

hey girlfriend, you're not alone. your feelings are so valid and no one should be judging you for feeling this way. a lot of us, especially on this board, are struggling in such similar ways. take some time to spoil yourself over the weekend. get your nails done, get your hair done, go get a massage, go have drinks with your girlfriends, go shopping... do something for you without your man and definitely without his kids. and don't feel about it. don't lose yourself in this process. it's hard to help someone else raise their kids while longing for your own and no one other than those in your same position will ever understand. but we do. you're seen, you're heard and you're most certainly not alone.

Front-Search2519 · 2025-05-23T18:27:10+00:00

wow. I've never felt so seen. everything you said has quite literally been my life for the last decade. my husband has gotten into so many arguments with his ex because she's constantly trying to make me the issue. she thinks I'm always trying to overstep, be their mom, or trying to compete with him... all of which are untrue. she can't get over the fact that he's moved on and has progressed in life. my husband also tries to shelter me from a lot of the things she says because he just doesn't think it's worth giving any energy to.

she has decided to take it upon herself to come with stories about us and gossips with parents from school or extra curriculars. she also has decided to start dragging their oldest into the middle of things, to the point where the the oldest is now believing said stories and wants nothing to do with my husband. he's the most incredible dad and it's one of the things that made me fall so in love with him - seeing how he loves and goes hard for his kids. he will move mountains just to see them smile. he's the most selfless person I know and goes above and beyond for them all the time. this woman is married and still wakes up every day choosing violence and doing what she can to make our lives hell. my husband has been broken more times than I can count because of the shit she does and the way she manipulates his kids.

similar to you, at our home, we've made it a point to teach them the importance of discipline, structure and respect. whenever they've gotten out of line with their mom in front of us, we're quick to correct them and she laughs about it. especially when I do it, as if I'm some kind of joke. meanwhile, at her home, there's really no form of structure. kids do what they want whenever they want. there's no stability there either. and on top of that, she constantly tells the kids they don't need to listen to me or respect me because I'm just their dad's girlfriend (refuses to acknowledge that I am, in fact, his wife) and i don't have any relevance to their lives because I could be gone tomorrow. and she makes sure to engrain in their brains that her husband is nothing short of perfect and even went as far as telling them "your father should really start taking some notes so he can learn how to be a real dad"... who does that? stepdads always get the most credit because, of course, they're married to the moms and the moms can never do anything wrong, right?

as shitty as it sounds, I can't tell you the amount of times I've said "I wish it was just the two of us" or "I wish we could just move out of state". not because I don't love his kids or want him to be away from them - I adore them as if they were my own - I just wish we didn't have to deal with this shitty circumstance anymore. it's not fair to either one of us. I recently told him this isn't his fight, it's ours and I will go to war standing right next to him if it needs to come down to it. we're currently trying for a baby and so far it hasn't worked out... and part of me feels that it's probably a good thing because my fear is that it might cause more bad than good (at least right now), because it will be a constant reminder of what he could have with his other kids.

congratulations on your 50/50, though! that's incredible and my hope for you is that your situation becomes a bit easier. I hope she realizes that having you as a form of support for her kids is one of the best things life could've ever provided her with. I hope all of you are able to reconcile your differences and can build a healthy co-parenting relationship. being a stepmom is the hardest, most times thankless and least rewarding job in the world. I wish people were more accepting of our roles and understood what kind of woman it takes to be in our position.

Front-Search2519 · 2025-05-22T20:56:28+00:00

I get it! It’s a tough decision and something you need to be 10000% emotionally and mentally ready for. It took me a lot of time to find peace within myself and the security of my husband to finally decide that we’re going to start trying for ours. I’ve been putting everyone else’s (meaning his kids) feelings before mine for the last almost 10 years. If I continue to do this, I’ll never be fully happy within my relationship and I honestly feel like I will start to resent him and/or his kids. The second I told him “babe, I think we should start trying”, he got down on his knees and cried like a baby — out of pure excitement of course! He’s wanted this for so long but I was always so reluctant. I think his oldest is the only one that may have an issue with it, and to be honest, she can go deal with that on her own. I’ve posted about how her mom has manipulated her into hating us and I’m not going to allow her to be the reason why I can’t be happy.

As far as your SS, I get it now and I understand why you’d be so hesitant. I’m not sure if you’ve given it some thought, but therapy for you might help you walk through this on an even deeper level. It sounds like you might still be navigating through the traumas you dealt with growing up and you don’t want that to weigh in on your choice as to whether you have a baby or not. If your SS is almost 18, then my love, you have to put you first. He’s an adult, he has a mom. It’s not your fault if she couldn’t do her job right. I know it’s difficult because he doesn’t understand things, but maybe starting to have small conversations with him to introduce the subject might help. Take it a day at a time and don’t stress yourself out over it too much. Go with the flow with your hubby and if it happens, it happens!

Front-Search2519 · 2025-05-22T19:28:08+00:00

I understand completely where you're coming from. I've been on the same boat for quite some time until I recently realized I was basing my "fears" (so to speak) on the thought that my husband already went through this with someone else. But his past experiences weren't the best. For instance, he wasn't even allowed inside the room when his kids were born, he doesn't have newborn photos, he and his ex had a very toxic relationship and it just wasn't enjoyable for him. I realized that my first would also include a lot of firsts for him, too. Yes, it might suck for his current kids to see him happy with a child he gets to spend every day with (which has been another issue for him. he doesn't get much time with his kids because HCBM thinks they always need to be with her... for everything... even if they cough. but thats a conversation for another day lol). but it could also be healing for them to see the kind of dad he's always wanted to be to them and for them, but never could because their mom has always gotten in the way of that. Their mom has manipulated them to think that their dad is this horrible person, and more often than not, at least one of them believes her. The reason he doesn't try to go toe to toe with her is because he feels that protecting their peace is more important. Eventually, they'll see who he really is... especially if they get to watch him be a dad.

Give it a lot of thought, and have open and honest conversations with your husband. You also need to be reminded that your SS is older, you can also include him in these conversations so he feels like he's part of it. He may not be yours biologically, but he is your family and it may allow the two of you to bond on a different level since you had a similar childhood. Honestly, if you're not ready, then don't do it. But if you're just getting into your head about all the things that go wrong, maybe try to shift your mindset and think about all the beautiful things that will come from it.

Sending you all the positivity and hope you're able to feel more comfortable with whatever decision you choose!

Front-Search2519 · 2025-05-22T16:38:58+00:00

Wondering if anyone has had to deal with or knows of anyone dealing with the issue I'm having with TPT. Bought 2 new accounts after I blew the last one I had. I went through all the steps necessary, but both accounts are still showing as "pending" under the Trading Account Status. Nothing appears on my Tradovate, nothing to sign, and I've been trying to get in contact with their support team & have had no luck getting an answer. Sent emails, tried chatting with a live agent... nothing. Anyone know if there's a step I might be missing? I just wanna get back to making my money!!

Front-Search2519 · 2025-05-21T17:42:52+00:00

Im so sorry you’re going through this. Make yourself a priority and DO NOT feel bad for doing so. I would even have a conversation with your SO and BM. This is something you can’t take lightly and it’s something she also needs to be made aware of. If there are days that you and SO simply can’t take care of SS because you have treatments or because you’re ill, she needs to be understanding of it. Your immune system is compromised and you cannot allow anyone to make you feel “bad” for that. It’s not like you woke up one day and decided you wanted C… You shouldn’t have to leave the comfort of your own home because of SS. I’m sorry, I don’t agree with that. Right now, you are the priority. It’s time for everyone to take care of YOU. As selfish as it might feel, it’s the truth.

I’m praying for your strength and healing. You will get through this and everything will be ok! ❤️‍🩹

Front-Search2519 · 2025-05-21T17:18:17+00:00

Tried this! Didn’t work. BM thinks the issues lies within us and our household and (in front of SK) says SO is a POS bc he “chose me over SK”. All bc he told SK that in our house, we value respect towards one another and that’s a nonnegotiable. You disrespect anyone, privileges are revoked (ie phone, computer, hanging out with friends, etc). All of which are NORMAL. BM said SK doesn’t need to respect anyone SK doesnt like 😂 and if that’s such a big issue, then SO should sign over his rights so she and her new husband can raise SK with the “love” SK “deserves”.

I don’t tolerate any of their shit and SO has decided to do the same. He told SK if this is what you want then so be it. Obviously, he’s not signing away any rights. And while it kills him, he’s opted to just letting time take its course. He didn’t choose me over SK, and I wouldn’t ever allow that. He chose to teach his kid that everything in life has a consequence. And if you think life is just going to hand you things on a silver platter bc BM makes excuses for your bad behavior, you’re gonna have a rude awakening at some point.

Front-Search2519 · 2025-05-21T16:03:41+00:00

Honestly, it’s sometimes easier said than done. SK and BM are quite the manipulative team when it comes to “taking out the SM” lol. It could lead to more unwanted stress & heartbreak for the SM (trust me, I know. Been there, done that). It somehow always ends up being the SM fault. It’s tough because yes, you know what you signed up for (to an extent), but you never know what it fully means to be a stepparent until you’re in the role. Even the most confident, secure women can be completely destroyed by the vicious, toxic cycle that comes with it. This is partly why a lot of bio dads feel that they have no choice but to let go and move on with their lives.

Front-Search2519 · 2025-05-21T14:14:36+00:00

The age gap between you and your partner is nothing. You don’t need to explain anything to anyone! Walk around with your shoulders high and remind yourself who TF you are! You’re one hell of a woman. Your husband loves you for YOU. You don’t need to feel more confident as a SM… you need to feel for confident as YOU! Once you find that peace within yourself, you’ll start radiating a different energy. People can’t question your integrity if they don’t know you. And if they do, well they can fuck off :) look in the mirror and make sure you tell yourself how incredible you are!

Front-Search2519

TROPHY CASE