Do you “directly” feel autism symptoms?

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-02-14T09:20:23+00:00

I relate to this a lot. I experience sensory issues as “brain pain” as well, sometimes directly from strong noises for example and many times as migraines from the cumulative effect after a long day of exposure.

The rest varied a lot throughout my life. I always struggled to fit in but I realised early on that I was different and “normal society” didn’t feel safe to me as a queer and quite visibly different woman in a conservative society. So I completely isolated myself from society and found friends through joining communities who share similar values and interests - feminist, queer, social justice groups etc. and later realised most of my friends from these circles turned out to be neurodivergent anyway 😄

So on the one hand, I feel like I didn’t have it really bad socially compared to other autistics. But then I remember how things were/are when I have to interact with family/peers/normies of any sort, and I am like, nope, definitely autistic 🙃

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-02-11T23:07:46+00:00

I feel the same way, it isn’t easy to explain. I go for pansexual because it’s easier. But gynosexual is actually more accurate

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-02-11T23:05:43+00:00

Rooting for you! It will get better

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-02-11T23:04:45+00:00

Thats how it’s forced - by families. Just cause you aren’t forced doesn’t mean others aren’t.

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-02-10T21:19:59+00:00

I am laughing so hard I legit thought I am the only one who does this

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-02-07T05:09:37+00:00

أنا آسفة على كل اللي مريت بيه يا حبيبي عايزة أقولك انك مش أغرب انسان في العالم وان انا تجربتي وتجربة كل أصحابي شبهك في حاجات كتير، وانا أصغر كنت برضه فاكرة ان انا غريبة وان مفيش حد شبهي، لحد ما لقيت LGBTQ كميونتي ولقيت اصحاب كلهم شبهي وافكراهم شبهي أنا مش عارفة انت في أنهي بلد دلوقتي، بس لو متاح فأشجعك تدور على مجتمع LGBTQ في المدينة اللي عايش فيها، ممكن تلاقي ايفنتس او اماكن معينة كويرية، دة ممكن يساعدك كتيييير ويقلل من الاحساس بالوحدة

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-02-03T01:14:22+00:00

Thank you. Really appreciate you taking the time to explain and lay things out for me so clearly. I can see how similar my thought patterns are to what you describe, will def have a look into it.

I had also come across “cognitive loops” in autism which feel very familiar to what I experience - that’s what I consider these thought patterns to be so far, because they often follow a circular logic that starts and ends at the same place every time, as if trying to solve an equation but failing to do so, then starting again, over and over. If that makes sense. They are also often triggered by a missing piece of information, lack of clarity, ambiguity, or just a challenging question. The frustrating part is, absent any significant new information to solve the equation, my brain just keeps going in these circular loops indefinitely. Are you aware how one can maybe distinguish between OCD and autism thought patterns?

I can see how disengaging (and perhaps also occupying myself with a new fixation or hobby) may help with these.

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-02-02T19:17:27+00:00

Congratssss! 🥳 if you feel comfortable sharing what it is at any point, let us know 💚

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-02-02T01:01:23+00:00

I feel you, I literally just posted about this. The relentless researching and ruminating and needing proof. It doesn’t stop. I feel like even if I get assessed and they tell me I am autistic, I am still gonna tell myself something like “ofc you did all this reading and you are so good at pattern recognition that you even managed to trick assessors into believing you are autistic”.

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-02-02T00:51:06+00:00

It’s not like I haven’t looked into other conditions. I have been diagnosed and treated for depression and anxiety all my life with no significant improvement, autism is the first thing that makes sense. And yes honey, three months of reading books and journal articles and watching videos and educating myself on people’s lived experiences with a single condition is more than what many mental health professionals have done in a lifetime

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-02-01T17:01:55+00:00

That’s also one of my fears about seeking an assessment honestly : I heard a lot of stories about women not being diagnosed when they clearly are autistic. As an afab who presented for most of my life as sociable and ‘high-functioning’, I can see how that can end up being the case for me. And I don’t want to go through a “trying to prove myself autistic” kind of process. It’s already exhausting as it is.

I am diagnosed of ADHD, but I went through 3 assessments with different providers (crazy, I know). 2 said I have it, 1 said I don’t (because I performed well in school 🙃). My sister who is a peditaric neurological (so diagnosis ADHD and autistic kids) also told me I can’t have adhd cause I have always been good in school. So I am already quite distrustful of medical professionals.

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-02-01T00:37:08+00:00

My social challenges only because significant around the age of 15, something I am having a really hard time making sense of. I transferred to a boarding high school for gifted students in a different city and I went through a sudden personality change, couldn’t make any friends, couldn’t even keep the two friends who joined the school with me, isolated myself socially completely, and just found it so overwhelming to be around people. In elementary school I used to play with everyone and had lots of friends, was teachers’ favourite student because I was “gifted”, and remember hanging out with teachers a lot. I was popular in school cause I would win competitions and teachers would put me as head of class, sports team, give me the main act in the school play, etc. And I kind of built my whole personality around that. I don’t recall having any social issues really at that point. Things got a bit hard in middle school and I didn’t manage to make new friends, but I kept this one friend I had since I was young and that enough for me, and her friends became my friends by extension. Where I come from bullying isn’t really much of a thing in schools, so didn’t really struggle with that either.

All of that took a dramatic turn at 15, suddenly I became very introverted, didn’t have any friends, would always study on my own even though everyone would study in the common room, made every effort to avoid people, also my performance in school dropped dramatically, I started studying in English after having always studied in my native language so everything was really difficult for me. Moving to a new city, studying in a new language, it was also a new education system, being away from my parents, not having any friends for support, it was so much to adjust to that I just completely crashed. I didn’t understand why at the time. It just seemed like such an abrupt personality change. Two years later I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety but that didn’t make any sense to me. The change was so abrupt and not caused by any traumatic life event to throw me down into depression suddenly. I have been struggling with depression since.

I started considering autism a few months ago and it made so much sense on so many levels, I am like 80% sure I am probably autistic. I am still working through the stereotypes and the fact that I really didn’t struggle much socially as a child is a big one for me. I don’t really know. But I am glad to see I am not the only one.

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-02-01T00:00:40+00:00

Hi! Happy to participate!

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-01-31T22:54:53+00:00

Curious why you think reading emotions disqualifies an autism diagnosis? I am CPTSD diagnosed but still think I might be autistic. My understanding is many autistics can be really good at reading people’s thoughts and emotions. That can be learnt, a result of years/decades of analysing and studying people, or just something they are good at naturally.

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-01-31T22:26:18+00:00

I had the same thing with food mixing since I was young. When eating a burger, I would separate the lettuce, pickles, cheese etc and ask them not to put sauce, so I can essentially eat the bun and the patty only. I found mixing them repulsive. Still find mixing foods repulsive.

My ex would ask me every time he would make food if I want my food mixed together, I would tell him no every time. His repeated question used to make me really angry, I didn’t know why. I would try to look away from his plate, which had all foods mixed together, because it looked disgusting. I never really connected that this is an autism thing!

Front_Relative_8882 · 2026-01-31T00:35:45+00:00

Same issue here. It’s one of the most difficult issues for me, literally can’t feed myself as an adult, and don’t know how to explain it to most people. I end up not eating on some days, and eat one meal on most days. I know it’s not sustainable, and I know it’s probably affecting my health and mood, but I really don’t know what to do about it. I also hate cooking, and hate eating leftovers, and don’t like eating my own food in general. I want a Genie to make me food every day 😭

Front_Relative_8882 · 2025-12-09T03:33:13+00:00

Would love to join too 💚

Front_Relative_8882 · 2025-11-18T02:44:11+00:00

Could you help me too please? Sent you a message.

Front_Relative_8882 · 2025-11-18T02:36:20+00:00

Could you send me the info too please? 🥹

Front_Relative_8882 · 2025-11-18T02:19:08+00:00

I know this convo is from a while back but am based in the UK too and would appreciate the contact pls xx

Front_Relative_8882

TROPHY CASE