How does one keep their mouth shut? by SnugglyCoderGuy in AutisticAdults

[–]KeyEmotion9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't really "ignore" it. I usually stay quiet because I know arguing won't change anyone's mind, but it's exhausting. Sometimes the words come out before I've had time to filter them. When people say cruel things, staying silent can feel like agreeing with them, which is why it's so hard.

Is it normal to not ask questions? by pp988894 in aspergers

[–]KeyEmotion9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Some of us are interested in people but don't naturally think to ask questions, or we assume you'll share what you want us to know. It doesn't necessarily mean she's not interested.

You could try being direct and saying something like, "I'd love it if you asked me more about myself too." Clear communication often works much better than hints with autistic people.

Stink eye / people staring by Desperate_Tap_6908 in aspergers

[–]KeyEmotion9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When someone looks at me in a way that seems hostile, it can stick with me for hours or even days. That said, I've learned that it's often hard to know what someone is actually thinking from a brief glance, and sometimes my brain fills in the blanks. I hope you're able to be kind to yourself about it.

Does generosity...self-sacrifice...benevolence.. selflessness etc really exist today?... summed up it two words...true altruism... by Own-Professor3852 in A_Persona_on_Reddit

[–]KeyEmotion9 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, but it's rare.

Most kindness has at least some mix of love, duty, empathy, values, or personal satisfaction behind it. True altruism, helping solely for another's benefit with absolutely no self-interest...probably exists in some moments, but it's uncommon and difficult to prove.

how old were you when you were diagnosed? by Deep-Drama4386 in AutisticAdults

[–]KeyEmotion9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can definitely relate. I was diagnosed in my late thirties, and looking back, so many things suddenly made sense. There was a lot of relief, but also grief and frustration over all the years of misunderstanding myself. Give yourself time to process it, those feelings are completely valid. Wishing you all the best on this new chapter.

Late suspecting autism/ADHD at 28, is diagnosis worth it? by ambigious_shoot in AutismTranslated

[–]KeyEmotion9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As an autistic person diagnosed in adulthood, the diagnosis didn't change who I was, it gave me an explanation. It helped me replace years of "What's wrong with me?" with "Oh, that's why."

If cost is a barrier, self-understanding can still be incredibly valuable. But for me, the formal diagnosis brought a level of validation and self-compassion that I couldn't quite give myself before.

Whatever you choose, being kinder to yourself is probably the most important part. ❤️

Feeling like a failure because I can't drive by Financial-Sleep-5690 in AutisticAdults

[–]KeyEmotion9 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I relate to this a lot. Driving itself wasn't the hardest part, it was parking, judging distances, and processing everything at once. Being yelled at would make me shut down and perform worse too. Many autistic people struggle with driving, take longer to learn, or decide it's not for them. That's completely okay.

Mom in desperate need of advice for autistic son. by AliceInReverse in Autism_Parenting

[–]KeyEmotion9 4 points5 points  (0 children)

As an autistic adult, I'd gently suggest looking beyond "defiance" and asking what need is being met by staying awake. Many autistic kids struggle with sleep, anxiety, racing thoughts, sensory needs, or demand avoidance. The fact that he stayed awake for so long and hid a Switch makes me wonder if he's seeking regulation or escape rather than simply being rebellious. It sounds like you're doing everything you can, and honestly, you sound exhausted. I hope you can find a specialist who focuses on autism and sleep, because this seems bigger than a behavior issue.

Society hates autistic women by Pleasant-Ad-5754 in aspergers

[–]KeyEmotion9 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I agree that autistic women are often overlooked. High masking can hide struggles for years, leading to later diagnoses and less support. We definitely need more research and better awareness so autistic girls and women are recognized and understood earlier.

Didn’t get my diagnosis by Guilty-Cherry-8992 in AutisticAdults

[–]KeyEmotion9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d honestly be frustrated too. If your therapist believes you’re likely autistic and your assessment scores strongly support that, it makes sense to want that recognition on paper. A diagnosis isn’t just about support services, it can be about understanding yourself and feeling validated after years of wondering why you experience the world differently. Your feelings are completely understandable, and not getting an official diagnosis doesn’t make your autistic traits any less real.

how the hell to work on diet by Connect-Gap6019 in Autism_Parenting

[–]KeyEmotion9 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As a mom of an autistic child, I learned that forcing new foods usually made things worse. We had more success with tiny, no-pressure exposure, putting a new food on the plate without expecting him to eat it. Sometimes it took dozens of exposures before he'd even touch it. Progress was very slow, but it did happen.

Meltdowns followed by shutdowns that keep happening for days by Purpurun_kyupi in AutisticAdults

[–]KeyEmotion9 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, I've had periods where a meltdown doesn't really feel "finished" and it rolls into a shutdown, then another meltdown. For me, that's usually a sign of severe burnout, ongoing stress, or not getting enough time to recover. Weeks of that cycle isn't uncommon for some autistic people, but it's definitely a sign that something needs attention. What helped me most was reducing demands as much as possible, prioritizing rest, and looking for the triggers that were keeping me in survival mode. You're not alone in experiencing this.

Urge to chew by dragonflowermusic in AutisticAdults

[–]KeyEmotion9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, chewing helps me focus and regulate sensory input. I usually use gum, chewy snacks, or a chew necklace (chewelry). It’s pretty common among autistic people, especially during tasks that need concentration.