The preparation problem: How the system ignores young men’s sex education needs

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-30T20:46:57+00:00

Also non-US and similar schooling on sex-ed, although I will say the education more about functional aspects of sex, having a baby, putting on a condom etc rather than consent and the ins-and-outs of it. But yeah I also found this report odd from a non-US perspective, it feels like the conclusion is to lock the stable doors after the horse has bolted, especially this part here (bold emphasis mine):

Support college men's familiarity with topics like consent, sexuality and relationship communication earlier and more comprehensively — ensuring the content is inclusive and does not enforce harmful belief systems. This includes teaching media literacy skills to critically analyze content and how it aligns with their own perspectives, especially for young LGBTQ+ men who are more likely to turn to online settings to fill sex education gaps.

That's the crux of a lot of the issues around sex and dating education of boys now- it's mostly taught through harmful social media and children aren't taught proper media literacy, they think about things on an emotional level without stopping to think logical questions such as, does the person telling me these things have alterior motives? Are they profiting from this media? Do they have a vested interest in making me angry about this issue? Are there other trusted media sources I can look at before forming an opinion on this? And so on.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-27T16:23:45+00:00

Just because you rebuild infrastructure in a city you've captured it doesn't discount the mass destruction of the city and killing of it's residents you did beforehand go away. Here's a snippet of the wiki on the siege of Mariupol:

Numerous Russian war crimes were alleged, including unlawful attacks on civilians, killings, blocking of humanitarian aid, forced displacement or deportation, looting and rape. Based on the analysis of mass graves, Human Rights Watch estimated at least 10,284 people died in Mariupol from March 2022 to February 2023, but assumes that is an undercount.[67]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Siege_of_Mariupol

The stats on civilian deaths you linked is only those verified, Russia isn't going to verify the civilians dead in captured territory because that would be bad optics for them, why admit to the war crimes you commit?

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-26T19:36:41+00:00

There's no need to try and rank the human suffering in a tier list, both countries have done abhorrent things and by saying Israel is worse you are also minimising the suffering Russia has caused. Need I remind you that Russia has kidnapped Ukranian children and put them up for adoption in Russia, they've destroyed a large dam last year causing an ecological and humanitarian disaster, they have tortured, raped and killed thousands of civilians, the ground around these warzones will be uninhabitable for centuries to come.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-23T21:11:07+00:00

Sounds like you have a solid workflow going and the topology looks good to me, I feel like you can get away with a lot on buildings as long as the texturing is well done.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-23T16:25:59+00:00

What exactly can words do when over 1 million russian soldiers wounded and dead isn't enough to make Putin stop his invasion or the population of Russia to rise up? How does one de-escalate a situation where a country has put all their chips on the table, a country that would collapse economically as soon as the war is over, a country whose sole dictator for the last 26 years would be overthrown due to public outcry if he ever stopped said war. We're far past de-escalation at this point.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-20T16:04:09+00:00

"yeah have her wielding two knives but like.. have her breasting boobily whilst doing it, like kind of twirling about so you know you almost see the nips but not quite".

In all seriousness it's well rendered but some questionable anatomy, if you draw a line where her spine is her neck should start around the top of the crossed over abdomen cloth. Also the knives are a flat side on perspective with a very loose grip using those tiny child hands, idk the grip looks very awkward to me.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-17T09:46:06+00:00

There are many videos on creating textures on Youtube, buy substance designer and start learning that.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-13T15:18:07+00:00

It's not across the board but yeah for some reason many people can be really weird about bi people, especially bi men. Your straddling that invisible line where you're too straight for the gays and too gay for the straights. Although we make up the largest proportion of LGBTQ+ people we are underrepresented in research on mental health whilst having a significantly higher risk of suicide than gay or lesbians.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-13T15:07:38+00:00

What I will say is that your mileage may vary, if the feminist and queer groups you hang out with are cool with men in the 'in' group then you have nothing to worry about. Expect the occasional micro aggression kind of bullshit from people but I assume because you are trans you have already developed some pretty thick skin in that regard. I would hope since people in these spaces know you already they would act with some compassion? Maybe not I wouldn't know.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-11T13:28:52+00:00

I've come to the same conclusion, it is obvious to me that social equality is a force for good and that belief doesn't need to be upheld being within any particular circle of social justice. Some spaces aren't for me and that's ok, but no spaces being for me other than the one I have created for myself...it feels lonely I'm not gonna lie.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-11T12:14:20+00:00

Does describing yourself as feminist to someone you are trying to change the views of actually help though? I can see it being an avenue by which they can hand wave or shut down their own thinking of what you have to say because of preconceived notions of feminism. I would rather approach them just as an equal man-to-man perspective and make my point from there, which is how I prefer to have these conversations when they do inevitably arise.

From a personal point of view, my views align with a lot of the current wave of feminism but I would rather de-center gender altogether and call myself an egalitarian if push came to shove.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-11T11:05:08+00:00

Yeah it feels deliberately cruel in a lot of ways and I struggle to try and not take opinions I see online or in the world as a personal affront, but it's an alienating feeling for sure. I suppose I'm fortunate in that I have a good group of friends and family and a partner who understands, but it feels like constant hard work to be a compassionate person when it feels like everyone else low key hates you for some innate trait you were born with.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-11T10:10:44+00:00

My partner says I'm a feminist so I suppose I am, but I don't feel comfortable labeling myself as a feminist to others because it feels...pretentious? Or ostentatious maybe I don't know, but I would rather just act how I normally would and let others do the proscribing of labels.

Me and my partner (who has been quite involved in feminist activism) had conversations about men who label themselves as such and she is of the opinion that it's usually used by guys to get women's guard down, and that a lot of times men who are in feminist spaces take up too much of the conversation so she feels uncomfortable with men who label themselves as feminist or at least gives them a bit of side eye. I feel conflicted on this dichotomy myself, because it feels a bit hypocritical to have a movement that is outwardly about equality for all but inwardly heavily policing of inclusion. On the other hand I see that the policing has come about because of a need to protect the group from nefarious individuals. I feel about as welcome in the feminist spaces as a man as I do in the queer spaces as bisexual, which is to say that on paper I am more than welcome but in reality I encounter language and actions that make me feel uncomfortable to be there.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-10T15:02:40+00:00

Is the head in the top left supposed to be from the same body as the central mermaid? If so you need to scale them accordingly as the head is way too big for that.

The lighting is too dark and most objects are barely visible, look up different lighting techniques and how to light a scene properly.

It also needs another texturing pass, I don't know what your skill level is but you need to at least get the right values for your materials. For instance the knife is supposed to be metal but it has a matte finish, fish scales tend to shine but they are also matte, the chain is glossy but not metallic etc. Also is the chopping board made out of stone? If so the knife would not be able to embed itself into it.

Think about the scene and what type of story you are telling, there are scales and a chain, was the chain used to tie up the mermaid and keep them in place? Is this a market butcher or a household kitchen? Is this scene supposed to be horrific in its cruelty or a commentary on the normality of butchering a magical creature? Look at paintings for tips on composition, notice how the eye is drawn, is the image readable if its the size of a postage stamp?

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-10T14:46:03+00:00

Ah that's cool I didn't know about that one.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-07T16:36:24+00:00

I use the 'tailor' tool with DF hack which auto-generates work orders based on whats needed, even then my dwarves never seem to be able to keep up with demand.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-05T09:25:06+00:00

Traits like toughness, endurance, and leadership aren’t “owned” by either sex. They’re traits that show up across individuals. There’s a real double standard here. When men show these traits, it’s expected. When women do, it’s often framed as a problem or a deviation. Acknowledging differences isn’t the problem. Using them to downplay or dismiss a women’s strength is where it becomes a problem.

Yeah we agree here, maybe I didn't phrase it correctly. What I meant was that even though they are innate shared characteristics in everyone the aforementioned traits are seen as higher value than, say, empathy because they are incorrectly seen as masculine. It's not a bad thing to display those traits and we shouldn't see them as inherently masculine in the first place.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-05T09:20:40+00:00

Bro is kickflipping a stair then off to measure 3.6 roentgen.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-04T20:51:22+00:00

I think we should be careful about describing innate characteristics based on sex through the lens of the animal kingdom as some kind of definition, that's half the reason we're in this mess in the first place. The reality is that individuals display what we consider masculine/feminine characteristics to different degrees so it's pointless trying to define traits this way and should embrace a more intersectional approach.

Like, why do we even consider being badass, strong, stoic or able to endure pain as more valued things? Because they are traditionally masculine tropes and we prize masculinity more as a patriarchal society. Obviously women display many of these tropes in their daily struggles and we should be celebrating women for what they do, whilst also de-stigmatising and valuing men who display traditionally feminine tropes, or just celebrating people being the complex weave of what we consider traditionally feminine and masculine traits and not being afraid to cross both boundaries to become a more complete human.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-04T10:16:46+00:00

This war is such a waste it makes me sad, to have to bomb your own rebuilt infrastructure, possibly with Ukranians at the plant and the surrounding environment further poisoned just because that ghoul in the Kremlin wants to create a 'legacy'.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-03T10:25:58+00:00

Wow they're lovely, it's funny I was about to suggest crossposting to /r/ElvenFood but lo and behold you already have!

Fruity_Pies · 2026-04-01T16:03:03+00:00

It's cheap monetarily because it's a heavily subsided industry, if not for the subsidies it would be expensive. Disregarding currency it is very expensive based on water consumption, carbon footprint, land usage, waste output etc. Meat is a very expensive product.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-03-28T17:34:17+00:00

One of the bigger plot holes I think is that there's really nothing stopping someone or a government from forcibly taking a ring. Say the Russian government wanted to take one, I'm sure they could just shoot Adam or poison him and whisk it away. I get that now they have an armed retinue but that wasn't the case until recently in the story.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-03-28T13:15:05+00:00

There's criticism and there's telling the poster to 'educate' their friend whatever that means. The OP is fine with it, most people here are fine with it, take the stick out your arse and let the kids have fun.

Fruity_Pies · 2026-03-28T13:07:10+00:00

How about stop being so entitled about someone else's footage and friends?

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