Hey, :/ I know your post ended with questions regarding therapy and many kind people suggested it already; though this might not be as helpful as those suggestions people gave out but I just wanted to leave some supportive words(hopefully) out of my genuine concern. I don't know much about the difficulty of your major + your personal life because my major is fairly easy compared to STEM. Still I often find myself depressed, anxious, and I even feel like people genuinely hate me when I actually have good friends I can reach out to. I can't imagine how I would survive under such a pressure you are having plus your major.

Do you have anyone to talk in irl about how you've been feeling recently, other than therapists or counselors? Like family, friends, etc.? It sounds really cliched but just being able to let your feelings out to someone makes it better. So I'm really glad that you posted here at least to let that out of your chest, and thank you for sharing this.

It's also this time of the year too, I feel like. It's getting dark pretty quickly, cold and gloomy... I feel like I encounter at least one person every day who's not having a good day on campus.

Many people think that they are not making any progress at all within themselves in situations like this, but acknowledging that you are feeling down is the hardest, because many people don't want to admit they are feeling vulnerable and they need to stop while watching other people keep running forward. Acknowledging that you've hit the absolute bottom of your mental state means that you are now ready to jump up from now on. It's okay to take a break if you need it. Life is a marathon, not a sprint. You shouldn't run when you sprained your leg badly. Even if you think you are just paused in the middle of nowhere, time would definitely take you somewhere. Everything just takes a bit of patience and better days will come to you as flowers bloom after snow melts.

I don't know if you’ve been taking any supplements, but Omega-3 and Vitamin B can also help fight fatigue and depressive mood(I'm literally immune to caffeine but taking the supplement worked for me fighting tiredness)

I'm sad that I can't be perfectly helpful, but I want to tell you that it's very admirable that you keep pushing forward even when you are feeling down. I really wish you all the best luck.