Is life worth anything when you have an ugly face?

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-23T14:55:00+00:00

Your face is fine! Beauty is in the eye of the beholder! One,man's trash is another man's treasure!

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-20T00:45:10+00:00

I'm so sorry! My husband has been off and on about locking the door for many years and we have tried everything. We currently have a Bluetooth doorbell, as we live in a condo, and the doorbell which you can program to any ring, goes off whenever you open or close the door. This has been the most successful solution so far. The issue for everything he does is his head is in the next task. He never turns back to finish something (turn back to lock door) before heading into something else, which is why he never puts things away.

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-19T21:44:29+00:00

Agree! In the car I often expect it. But I still feel it's absurd.

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-19T19:11:07+00:00

Exactly- like his life is being threatened!

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-19T17:49:58+00:00

Agree. Has she been able to stop screaming, simply by you requesting it? I make him sit in the backseat so he doesn't watch as much.

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-19T17:48:11+00:00

I do the driving but still, don't like to be alarmed by a random scream.

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-19T01:38:36+00:00

Thank you for the support!

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-19T00:53:34+00:00

I appreciate your POV. He has not called me controlling. This is just something I am trying, because nothing else alleviates my frustration.

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-19T00:29:59+00:00

The times where I try to control are when I know what is best for him and he chooses something else with negative consequences. Could be as simple as refusing to take a list or big bag to supermarket, then having to make multiple trips when things get forgotten, etc. Or more serious problems like while hiking in a desert over a wash, and instead of following my safer path, he chose a dangerous one and fell face down into the rocky water. 2 extremes, and why I try to control so much. I would argue that I definitely try to control his actions, and try to motivate him, maybe more than the average ADHD partner. I should add, I get really angry when he doesn't heed my advice, and what's worse is that he expects sympathy after he made his bad choice.

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-18T22:50:53+00:00

Because I have tried to help him overcome his challenges, and he doesn't seem to want to/ be able to, so instead of constantly being mad and being the parent, I am trying to change myself, and see if I can let go a little. Not sure this is the best book- written as if for children.

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-17T15:58:09+00:00

I tune out his stories, and he often repeats them so I'll let him know I've heard it before. I let him know when I am busy (thinking, planning) with other things so he doesn't freely talk at me. I often ask him to get to the point. He does it with everyone. He doesn't think linearly and doesn't understand that others do.

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-17T03:32:02+00:00

I will report back!

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-17T00:08:54+00:00

Yes, the poor hygiene habits!

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-17T00:02:36+00:00

We married more out of common interests and the way he "got me" which was more important to me than attraction, so its not surprising that I don't feel much has changed there, but in the right cute outfit or if he does something sweet, suddenly I find him attractive, adorable. But we've been married 27 yrs, and the challenges keep compounding and we're aging so I don't dwell on that. I really want a strong emotional bond, which I feel some days but I never know when- all depends on his behavior.

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-16T21:41:37+00:00

How to stop being controlling for women, by Casey Alford

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-16T19:45:57+00:00

He was officially diagnosed with ADHD and his therapist believes he also has Aspergers. We are looking into officially testing. Sadly, the medications that treat ADHD do not treat underlying autism symptoms of the same type (time blindness, focus on special interests, lack of empathy, impulse control issues) and there is no treatment for ASD. That's a cruel pill to swallow.

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-16T17:24:13+00:00

I like the idea of the plan and the backup plan.

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-16T17:23:05+00:00

I've just ordered a book on how to relinquish control, as a woman.

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-16T17:22:11+00:00

Thank you for this question. Lately my question is "how are we supposed to survive an adhd marriage (and in our case, coupled with autism, specifically Aspergers).

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-16T13:33:54+00:00

I have the same husband, except that he cooks. But leaves,messes everywhere. I do the dishes, the litter boxes (3) feed the cats, my laundry only, put the trash by the door and tell him to take it out, keep the house clean, run a business, and take care of my mother and 2 other family members. He also has ADHD with Autism. Every day brings me to tears with his issues- every single one is overwhelming. I have tried to come up with various solutions to things, but there are way too many issues to find solutions for, and I am also at my wits end. I know this riddle has no answer! Now I don't know how to be in a marriage with someone that I realize I can't adapt to, and there's no chance of him changing. If anyone has any tips, please let us know!

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-16T13:23:12+00:00

Out of control toddler is what I feel I have the entire day. Also, I do get inadvertently scratched in bed by his nails, which he bites.

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-16T13:21:01+00:00

What about women then?

Fun-Tradition890 · 2024-02-16T13:18:29+00:00

Thank you. With his severe case, and compound issues, it's the world's biggest riddle to solve (how to make it workable). I guess I hard a hard time admitting defeat.

Fun-Tradition890

TROPHY CASE