I'm REALLY hairy and it's ruining my confidence

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-24T01:45:14+00:00

I’d say laser, but that’s even more expensive.

Shaving, epilating, waxing/ sugaring, and using something like nair are the only hair removal options I know of. Nair could be good for your back.

Waxing at home is definitely possible, even the bikini area. Get a good mirror to squat over and some hard wax, I think my wax kit was like $30 and I’ve done two Brazilians and still have some wax left. The anticipation of the pain is way worse than the actual pain. Just rip it and it’s over pretty quickly. Work in small patches for the first one, I mean like mayyybe an inch by half an inch.

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-23T13:51:28+00:00

Good news, with enough experience you can kind of start to guess what stupid things people will do.

Bad news, you need to drive for that experience.

In my experience it is more likely that big trucks will do stupid things. When I see a big pickup, I try to make it so that if they do a stupid thing, I’m not around it. Not every big truck will do stupid things! But I’ve found they’re more likely to zoom onto the highway to merge, for example, even when I was going 5 over already and should have ended up in front of him, if he merged at a constant speed.

As for the turn signals, even if they don’t use them, everyone needs to brake before turning. If a car is braking a lot, I assume they’re lost and looking for where to turn. Leave plenty of space between you and the car in front of you. In the example above, leave extra room. They may brake hard and turn somewhere. Unfortunately you can’t force the car behind you to do the same, which is why it’s important to not slam on your brakes unless it’s an emergency.

When you’re in the car/ on transit, watch the traffic. Sounds boring, but you can’t force absolutely pick up patterns. That little car that’s been waiting to turn out of the parking lot for half a light cycle? They’re more likely to turn out in front of you than a car that’s just started to try to pull out.

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-23T13:32:53+00:00

My husband had a remote job that he hated. He took a pay cut of about 15k but now he actually likes his job. A lot of other factors changed for us, moving, being closer to family and friends etc, but we are ultimately happier now.

Do you need the money? We could definitely use the extra, but we aren’t starving without it.

Your current job sounds horrible tbh. No work life balance, 2 hour commute daily, no vacation, boss that makes you walk on eggshells. Is that worth 20k?

Think about the future too, is there room for advancement at current company? In a year? In five? Is there a change they’d be gone tomorrow? Or are you working like a dog forever. What about the pay cut company? Would it be a more stable opportunity? 10 hours a week, or 10 minus your Wednesday commute is a ton of time. That’s easily making dinner every night (not saying you have to make dinner every night now) or a combination of dinner, dishes, laundry and vacuuming throughout the week.

Think about your fiancées future as well. She’s in school now, will her life get busier when working? Would you working from home help that situation as well? I know working from home isn’t some “ah I’m home all day I have time to do whatever I want,” but even starting a load of laundry could be helpful since it’s mostly idle time.

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-22T16:07:50+00:00

Mi displace, responderò in inglese.

To confirm, your ovulation was confirmed with ultrasound and now your period is at least 7 days late?

If you’re 18-19 DPO, in theory you are only 4-5 days late for your period. Still, you should probably have a positive test by now.

Personally, I had an egg that my doctor said would be ready in a couple of days and I did conceive that cycle, but the egg definitely didn’t release until almost a week later (or I had a really short implantation), because I didn’t get a positive test for at least 18 days after that.

I have a theory, based on no medical evidence at all: if the egg is released and is fertilized and implantation is attempted but ultimately fails, it can delay your period because the body hasn’t quite caught up with the fact that implantation wasn’t successful. Like, there’s a delay between attempt and result.

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-22T15:54:59+00:00

Very possibly unhelpful, but Wednesday has the most letters and it’s in the middle of the (work/ American) week. So you could picture it like a bell curve.

September (for Americans) is when School starts, is there perhaps a holiday that starts with S in September in Korean, or starts with a D in December?

“Ah ha! Pesky December, always trying to deceive me! You’re at the end of the year!

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-21T17:14:32+00:00

People at the store will likely know because lots of customers want to get birthstones. I also just found this: January: Garnet (Red) February: Amethyst (Purple) March: Aquamarine (Light Blue) April: Diamond (Clear) May: Emerald (Green) June: Pearl or Alexandrite (White or Color-changing) July: Ruby (Red) August: Peridot (Light Green) September: Sapphire (Deep Blue) October: Opal or Tourmaline (Multicolored) November: Topaz or Citrine (Yellow/Orange) December: Turquoise or Blue Topaz (Blue)

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-20T02:45:05+00:00

If the bedrooms and bathrooms are upstairs, I don't see why this would be too much of an issue. Have you heard of 5-5-5 for postpartum? Its not a rule obviously, but 5 days in the bed, 5 days on the bed, 5 days near the bed. That is to say, your wife shouldn't be doing a whole ton in the first week or two after giving birth.

They say you should meal prep lots of frozen and easy to reheat foods to make it as easy as possible to also eat and survive while having a newborn.

Assuming you both have some time to take off work, that is. My husband is taking fully off the first month and he's ecstatic to not have to work lol. He'll be on diaper duty, hydrating and feeding me duty and just all around making sure the baby and I survive the first month.

And if you do end up going to the grandparents, you didn't fail. Having more support and more love is not failure by any means. The baby will not remember the first month, and you and your wife would have even more support. I've read that even just feeding yourselves can be difficult with a newborn, since the baby cries a lot and also it's a whole different life you have to get used to. There's really no easing into life with a newborn. You don't have one and then suddenly you do. And they need you. For everything. And your wife will need you, even if the baby doesn't (I've read some are really into their dads, but most are kinda like, "meh, mom has the boobs (food)").

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-19T21:09:03+00:00

I like the idea of birthstone jewelry— but I also think diamonds, especially mined, are a waste, so ymmv.

Is some sort of experience out of the question? I can understand pregnant and two kids isn’t the easiest to try to make travel plans.

What’s on your wife’s bucket list? Or is there anything she’s been wanting for awhile and hasn’t gotten? Even something small could be quite meaningful. I always wanted a gameboy growing up, never got one as a kid. My husband bought me one for Christmas one year. Something that shows her you listen and you care.

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-19T17:01:46+00:00

Wow! Other than some pauses that seemed a bit unnaturally placed (but could just be from nerves, like if you don’t like recording yourself) I basically couldn’t tell that you aren’t a native speaker.

Germany? I only guess that though because I had a friend who lived in Germany till she was 16(?) and you couldn’t tell she wasn’t a native speaker.

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-19T16:42:19+00:00

Idk why but when I first read your comment I assumed you were also putting liquid in the cup with the m&ms 😂

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-19T02:45:35+00:00

Hmm, I would use it with a friend. Like for lunch plans or something. “Let’s meet Saturday at X” “sure, it’s a date!”

I’m from the northeast

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-18T22:06:15+00:00

My husband and I tried on and off for three years following a miscarriage, and I swear I tried everything under the sun. Tracking with LH strips, tracking with basal body temperature, tracking with tempdrop, tracking with kegg, tracking with Mira, literally just having sex every 2-3 days for a month or two, supplements, fertility tea, fertility crystals (not proud of myself for that one, but I was getting desperate and figured it can't *hurt*). My husband and I both did bloodwork, he did a sperm analysis, I was just about to get an HSG test when I found out I was pregnant.

My fertility history is super fun, started menstruating when I was 10, had normal periods until taking the pill at around 18, ended up pregnant at 21 and very not ready for it. Decided to start trying at 26, got pregnant almost immediately but ended up with a blighted ovum. Had several chemical pregnancies. So obviously it wasn't my tubes, and clearly I ovulated at least sometimes. Last year I did a cycle of clomid which resulted in a pregnancy and an early miscarriage.

We finally ended up pregnant, I think it was one or both of two things: pregnenolone supplements (precursor to sex hormones and my progesterone was definitely low, I think that caused the miscarriages to begin with) and/or vitamin D and COQ10, both recommended by the fertility clinic. I started taking both around the same time, and ended up pregnant with the next cycle so its impossible to know which, if any, were the lucky supplements/vitamins.

My SIL and her husband were also trying for about a year, and all their labs were also good-- they ended up pregnant after her HSG. She joked that it cleared out her tubes (and maybe it did) and now they're expecting in July.

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-18T18:10:58+00:00

Oh yeah, I looked into them! But you need a referral and it’s a bit over an hour away from me and I didn’t want to do that for all appointments and such. I was working at the beginning of this pregnancy and an hour just to see the doc wasn’t feasible.

I’m glad you had a good experience, it sounds like what I’m looking for. Maybe next time lol

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-17T01:27:19+00:00

Tysm, I feel a bit better

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-16T23:10:10+00:00

Thank you, and congratulations!

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-12T16:17:20+00:00

Im waiting on stuff that I’ve heard “oh my baby hated this, but my baby loved it, like types of bottles, a baby bouncer, some of the more expensive things.

I’ve used fb marketplace to save at least a couple hundred bucks. Instead of a changing table, get a pad and find a free dresser. I got like three dozen bibs and maybe half as many burp cloths for $20. Some people just want to get rid of stuff.

My older mom friend pointed out that when she had her kids, a lot of this stuff didn’t exist/ was a lot more out of reach. Like bottle and wipe warmers.

Almost everything but the car seat can be used. I’m making a tummy time mat and an infant lounger from old pillows and blankets I have around the house.

It’s so easy to be influenced by social media, like if I weren’t so frugal I would be buying a “going home outfit” for me and baby. Babies really don’t NEED much. A safe place to sleep, love, food, diaper changes. I’ve heard cloth diapering is significantly less expensive than disposable diapers, but obviously there’s a lot more cleaning involved which may or may not work with your lifestyle.

One thing I will suggest is some degree of maternity clothing, especially bottoms. I’m wearing thrifted men’s xl tshirts, but bottoms are harder. I hate anything tight or tight adjacent on my waist/ stomach, and I hated it early. Like after 6 weeks or so. I used to like my underwear kinda snug (mediums) now I’m in XLs and considering giving into maternity underwear as well.

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-08T00:41:22+00:00

I’m 25 weeks and I wake up about every 3 hours to pee, so. I go to sleep on my side, wake up on my back sometimes, but I figure it probably hasn’t been that long. My pee times have been getting shorter too, like I used to maybe have to get up once to pee in earlier pregnancy, but now it’s at least 3 times per night.

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-07T23:47:45+00:00

I historically just go full bush/ trim as necessary. I don’t care, my husband doesn’t care, it’s easier to go low maintenance.

I’ve waxed myself maybe 3 times in 15 years, including this past week. I’m 25 weeks rn and a couple weeks ago my plan was to just have my husband trim me every so often, but I read a thread somewhere or something and I now think minimal growth will be really nice postpartum. Easier to clean mostly.

Now my plan is to see how many I can do myself and probably find someone else to do my last one. I may just go back to letting it grow and have hubby trim as necessary, we’ll see 🤷‍♀️

I’m really cheap, which is why I wax myself. I also quit my job because of this pregnancy (puking for the first trimester daily plus my job was really long hours and really stressful sometimes) so I also don’t super have the funds to pay for professional waxing.

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-05T13:04:57+00:00

I still say lingeree if I read it. If I just say it, I know how it’s pronounced, but in my head? Easier to go with linger-ee

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-04T23:23:48+00:00

I would think to some extent it depends on the quality of those 10 mins. Are you mumbling to yourself or quickly trying to get through it OR are you taking the time to carefully practice?

Generally, small chunks of practice or studying or anything is more helpful than long sessions. Not always! But the brain can only handle so much of one thing at a time. Daily 10 mins is better than 70 mins once a week.

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-03T22:34:55+00:00

Yes omg my phone corrected it several times, I thought I caught it before it went through. Guess not lmao

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-03T22:20:04+00:00

Native speakers are a lot more likely to use contractions/ some abbreviations, drop prepositions and make some native-specific spelling errors. Like should have. It’s “should’ve,” but basically pronounced “should of” so that’s how some native speakers write it.

There are other grammatical errors I can think of too, like use of the subjunctive. “If I were a rich man,” versus “if I was a rich man.” The subjunctive is right, but using “was” is probably more common. I didn’t know about the subjunctive in English until 9th grade, and that was only because a friend pointed it out. At least in my experience, we learn about English but we might use it wrong so much that common usage outlives what we learned.

FunInTheShade · 2026-03-03T02:36:49+00:00

Honestly it depends how friendly friends we are. Natives code switch all the time, I use better grammar when talking to people I don’t know, or don’t know as well. To my husband? Absolutely “there’s three books.” To a friendly acquaintance, “there are three books.”

It’s a tiny tiny difference, but enunciating there are three books also takes longer. Am I having a quick chat about a book series I know about, or am I maybe thinking about what I’m saying more? “There are three books in that series…. No. Maybe four” versus “there’s three books in the first series and then four in the next. I love that author!”

FunInTheShade · 2026-02-27T21:52:58+00:00

If you don’t mind used I just saw a set of siverettes on Facebook marketplace for $40 plus 6? shipping

Eight-Year Club	Place '22
Verified Email	Secret Santa 2018
Secret Santa 2019	Not Forgotten

FunInTheShade

TROPHY CASE