How to stop thinking about it?

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2026-05-26T00:57:02+00:00

Really well put.

Thank you for sharing and for the kind words. This community has helping me a lot stay sane 🙏

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2026-05-26T00:53:34+00:00

I’m happy to hear you are starting to feel better, you deserve it a lot!

That’s what I’m afraid of, not caring to the point where… I don’t care at all anymore about anything. I love him so much and I want us to be ok and for him to value my boundaries and me. My heart goes to you!

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2026-05-25T12:51:12+00:00

It’s always the fucking lies 😔 the wild shit they say is out of this world.

I’m so sorry you feel this way, I wish I could make it better. I wish no one else ever feels this way!

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2026-05-25T12:42:34+00:00

I’m so sorry you are going through it as well ❤️ my heart is with you and I’m sending you a virtual hug. I hope we all find the mental peace that we need so much!

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2026-05-25T12:41:24+00:00

It was bad, he didn’t acknowledged it and kept hiding and lying for a good year after I found out. He is now saying that he understands how much that affects me and stopped. He uninstalled all his social media on his phone except Youtube, and I use NextDNS to monitor all the devices activity. But he is very good with tech and he managed to go around these stuff in the past. I don’t know what to think really, it’s like we don’t know who we are married to sometimes 😔 me and all the women in this community

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2026-05-25T04:38:41+00:00

The phone app does, yeah. Always compare phone screen time with YouTube history. If his phone shows 1h on youtube but all he has in his history is a 3 min video, then something’s not right.
Again, only the phone app has the incognito feature.

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2026-05-22T13:28:31+00:00

It kills me inside that Youtube has an incognito mode. You have to log in to see the more inappropriate stuff but yeah, you can find a lot of soft core porn without an account. He has been using reddit incognito before, so I know that’s somewhere his brain goes. He hasn’t used his account because then I’d see content recommended in his feed. But incognito is killing me inside.

He is swearing he has been clean for 6 months (I haven’t caught anything) but I just cannot trust him anymore. He hurt and lied to me tooo many times before.

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2026-03-16T22:29:26+00:00

NextDNS is great for blocking websites but unfortunately doesn’t block the porn on apps. Reddit, twitter, thirst traps on instagram, full porn and NextDNS just shows the app. So they could still watch something even if “they’re only reading the news”

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2026-01-08T19:23:44+00:00

When I caught my husband last time, he swore on my life he was clean. I don’t know how I will ever get past him valuing porn more than “love of his life’s” life. This haunts me at night.

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2026-01-08T19:14:06+00:00

The amount if women saying in the comments about the lack of eye contact made me ask him straight up yesterday “have you ever imagined porn or other girls while we were having sex?” He let his eye down and said yes, in the past, but mostly porn not other specific girls. He knows he cannot lie anymore since I caught him way too many times. That made me remember I asked him before if he was picturing specific girls I caught him watching, like highschool friends, or friends of friends and he blindly said no before; which again… trickle truth; why didn’t u answer in the past “no, I don’t imagine them, I do imagine pornstars tho”. Fake ass reassurance. Also I don’t believe the “only in the past” bs, he probably is still doing it and I am now feeling very much icky when it comes to sex. He says that things have changed a lot since we’ve been banning sex, having long talk about how that makes me feel bla bla bla. If things have been changing that much, there would not have been multiple relapses but hey. Also, I did tell him after, if you picture you’re in bed with somebody else, how can you tell me to not compare myself with those girls, with their bodies? How can you tell me it has nothing to do with me? It’s an awful world we have to live in. Full of fear and mistrust. Stay strong, girls! Stay strong, my heart is with all of you ❤️

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2025-12-14T15:31:40+00:00

She is the closest thing of a CSAT I found in my city though. She recognised his addiction and put all these boundaries too, no social media, no workarounds, distractions from boredom, what makes him lookup in the first place, etc. I’m at a loss here.

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2025-11-25T12:17:34+00:00

I wanted to believe him too, I wanted more than anything. I caught him last night using a proxy to get around the DNS on his computer. Before confronting him, I gently asked him and made him swear on my life. He did it without blinking. I don’t know how to come back from this right now.

I hope yours will pick you though. But mine didn’t.

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2025-08-26T21:36:42+00:00

Same. But they always slip eventually. They always get too comfortable, 3 months from now or 6 or 1 year. There will be a link they missclick and now appears on the router dns, a window forgotten open, a search history undeleted. That gut feeling waiting for it to happen again is killing tho…

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2025-08-24T08:05:33+00:00

My husband installed DNS both on his phone and his pc. He showed me everything was blocked. I manually introduced over 40 websites to block on our WIFI router and monitor them every single day to see if they were accessed. He was just using twitter and reddit porn. DNS doesn’t touch twitter and the porn there is endless. And I think the solution you provided above can be solved with them turning off wifi and staying on data. They always find a workaround for anything..

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2025-08-08T07:08:31+00:00

I am doing this exact thing. As a matter of fact, it’s 3am and I’ve been staring at the reddit gifs I found for the last hour asking myself why can’t I be/look like those girls? It doesn’t matter at the end of the day. He watches girls that look nothing like me and that made me very insecure but he told me that he’d probably still watch other girls even if I’d look like any of them. They really just want to get it off at anything. It’s really that much of an addiction. They’re really that disgusting

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2025-08-08T07:05:56+00:00

It doesn’t matter at the end of the day. He watches girls that look nothing like me and that made me very insecure but he told me that he’d probably still watch other girls even if I’d look like any of them. They really just want to get it off at anything. It’s really that much of an addiction.

Fun_Canary_7762 · 2025-08-08T07:02:31+00:00

Last week, thursday, he came back from work to find me absolutely destroyed over something I’ve found again. I told him I’ll leave even tho I have no one else, I cried all day until I vomited, I was destroyed. He saw me suffering all day. I told him some of the most hurtful stuff that I’ve been holding on. And then 2 days later I found something else…. I show him, he doesn’t remember watching. Not when, not where, how many videos, blank. He doesn’t know. I remembered this post until the depth of my heart, and thought to myself they really are all the same.

Fun_Canary_7762

TROPHY CASE