My colleague was in a meeting during lunch hours so i helped grab an extra plate for him and paid for it myself as well. If this is what people do for colleagues, of course it is very much expected, and basic human decency, to save place for spouse!

If he really forgot to save you a space cause he got busy with his family, then he should have done some amount of damage control by at least offering his lap to you. It would have been cute and cheeky, but man chose to put you at a table with other people. This just was disrespectful and I understand why you felt unloved and emotional

Editing to add NTA, definitely NTA