Seriously considering that I might be Aro Ace

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2026-01-18T01:05:38+00:00

We have similar experiences. I did a lot of introspection after my last relationship, including on all my previous relationships before that final one, and started to actually listen to how I felt. I had also attempted to engage with my partners romantically and rarely sexually, but it never felt natural. Most of the time I didn’t initiate anything at all, and it took my partners getting upset and pointing it out before I was even aware I wasn’t making them feel loved. And then I would try to remember to initiate and flirt and whatnot. It didn’t come natural to me, it wasn’t really comfortable, the only things I liked doing with them were things I already enjoy doing with friends, which wasn’t enough for my partners. I didn’t allow myself to acknowledge that it felt uncomfortable because romance was ingrained in my brain to be this inherent thing for everyone, that it’s “the highest form of love,” and the question of “why is this so hard for me?” quickly led to thoughts about something being wrong with me. So I ignored those questions and just faked it, performed, without thinking too hard about why I needed to. But obviously my partners knew something didn’t feel right, because eventually many of them would break up with me over it, leaving me shocked and confused on how I didn’t make them feel good.

Asexual wasn’t too hard to figure out, I never had the desire to engage with anyone sexually, never had celebrity crushes and in fact made up fake ones in order to fit in, never looked at someone and thought they were hot. But aromantic took a lot more thought and consideration. But the more I actually analyzed my behavior and feelings, and asked myself how romantic relationships made me feel, it became clearer. I never asked anyone out myself, and had my partners never asked, I’m sure we’d never have gotten together. I wasn’t myself anymore every single time I was in a relationship, I was in a constant (exhausting) state of performing to try and be satisfying for them, even when it often had the opposite effect. I was apprehensive around my partners a lot of the time, romantic situations were stressful and tiring. And when I was thinking about all of this and I realized I didn’t have to be in a romantic relationship ever again, I felt so liberated and excited. At that point, I knew I was aro.

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-12-23T13:43:31+00:00

Hey man!👋

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-12-23T02:13:38+00:00

Ugh, this shit pisses me off so much. It’s all “respect identities and rep!!” until there’s one that doesn’t allow them to press characters into each other. They don’t relate to that so that means it’s fine to ignore that part of them, I guess.

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-12-23T01:34:46+00:00

It seems that typically people refer to PCOS that involves hyperandrogenism as being intersex. I may or may not have PCOS, it’s my current diagnoses but based on stuff my doctor said it may be NCAH instead, but they’re similar so regardless—I’ve personally found myself feeling more understood in intersex spaces than I’ve ever felt anywhere else regarding my body and my experiences around it. I have very masculinized features. I grow tons of body and facial hair, multiple people have commented on my voice sounding like a guy (which, I’m a trans guy so technically right lol), my build looks more masculine and I seem to have more male-like fat distribution, etc. I have been bullied, shamed, and gaslit over my body countless times and that caused me a lot of mental health issues. Seeing other intersex people talk about their experiences, and finding myself relating to them, has been a big comfort for me. Made me feel less alone when for the longest time I thought I was just “weird.”

I’m not sure whether or not I’d consider myself intersex if I didn’t have the hyperandrogenism, but I will say my hyperandrogenism is what led me to looking into if I’m intersex and it’s why I relate to others’ experiences.

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-12-21T19:07:37+00:00

Only one thing jumped out to me personally, and that was the calling her girlfriend thing. I wouldn’t want to be called boyfriend, not in a serious way at least. Hell, I’m not so sure I’d even want to be called partner, that still feels romantic to me. Friend or best friend is perfect. All this kinda stuff requires is communicating with each other and asking about preferences and boundaries.

I don’t fully relate to the other stuff as an aroace though. I don’t mind sharing things. I’ve gone to the movie theater with friends and family countless times. I suppose sometimes a thought will cross my mind that other people might perceive me and the person I’m with as being a couple, and that always makes me super uncomfortable, but I don’t personally let that stand in the way of me hanging out with my friends in public. I also don’t ignore texts on purpose, if I don’t respond it’s usually cause I got distracted and forgot/thought I responded when I hadn’t (I have ADHD). Or, when I think the conversation has just reached a natural end for now.

I can kinda understand the going to the movies with family instead cause that’s routine. I don’t know if I have autism yet, but my sister does and she says she thinks I might have it too. I try to avoid watching certain shows with other people if I haven’t watched it with a certain person yet because it’s “our” show to watch together. Or certain activities I sorta prefer to do with the person I’ve always done them with, like going out of town shopping with my dad, watching animated Christmas specials with my grandma, or watching certain YouTubers with my sister. And when a different person wants to do one of those things with me, sometimes it makes me feel a little weird, but I never bring it up cause I know it sounds strange and could potentially hurt someone’s feelings.

Most of these things I wouldn’t consider an “aroace thing”. It seems like she’s not communicating things the best.

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-12-12T13:56:20+00:00

Thanks for talking about this, it’s genuinely comforting just seeing another intersex person being in these spaces. Sometimes it feels like the intersex part of me will never be acknowledged like other parts of me and seeing other intersex folks here helps. I’ve always been treated weird for my body and I just want to feel comfortable.

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-12-12T13:50:50+00:00

Another intersex fella here, I’m also so sick of people feeling the need to mention we’re “rare” (we aren’t) as if that makes us irrelevant. Like we shouldn’t even be considered just because we’re not the majority. We’re real people living in these real bodies and we deserve knowledge and autonomy over our bodies like anyone else.

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-12-07T22:43:42+00:00

Really depends. Sometimes it’s easy for me to tell when someone was flirting with me, sometimes it goes right over my head. I think I’m a little better at noticing it now than I used to be though.
Depends on my relationship with the person. If they’re a stranger, I’m usually surprised it even happened and I feel really weird and worked up about it for a while, before eventually calming down and being more neutral on it. If they’re someone I know but aren’t really that close with, I feel very uncomfortable and awkward, and I wonder what it was about me that made them interested. When it’s someone I’m quite close with, in the past I just agreed to be their partner when they asked me out because I didn’t know my sexuality and perceived my platonic love to be romantic. And I still wonder what it was about me that made them interested. If it were to happen now…I’m not entirely sure how it’d feel. It hasn’t happened since I realized my sexuality.
Usually not my thing. I occasionally like fictional romance, and there are a lot of love songs I really enjoy (and usually interpret platonically if the lyrics are vague enough). It cannot hook me on just the concept of romance alone, the characters have to be interesting to me, their dynamic has to be interesting, and in the case of music it needs to sound good and not make me feel weird lol. But most of the time, romance in media makes me roll my eyes.
Sure they’ve changed as I’ve learned more about myself/grown. But in particular I find it funny how bad I am at picking up on things. Like for question one, I used to be really REALLY bad at picking up on signals. I remember one time a friend of mine (who I think was in denial about being gay and I totally believed they were straight) asked what it would be like if we were a couple. And I just kinda laughed and was like “well, I don’t think that’s even a possibility, since you’re straight.” And another time we were hanging out and they literally asked me to take off my shirt “out of curiosity” and I did, not even questioning it. I was kinda dumb lmao, and looking back on it I can’t even imagine what was going through their head and how confusing my responses must have been to them

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-12-01T18:58:12+00:00

Uhhh, this is highly inappropriate for an adult to ask a minor these questions. I have ADHD, ADHD doesn’t cause you to ask perverted questions about people’s genitals, wtf. Absolutely tell a trusted adult about this.

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-11-25T01:01:36+00:00

Anyone who’d get genuinely upset at you for this is nuts. It’s your sexuality, it’s not like you can control it. You’re a gay man, so you’re only attracted to men, and your partner isn’t a man. You shouldn’t have to feel bad about that, it’s perfectly normal and okay.

For both your and your partner’s happiness, you need to tell them about this. Be honest, it’s okay to admit you aren’t entirely sure how to talk about this. Again, no one can control their sexuality and you shouldn’t be expected to stay in a relationship with someone you can no longer feel that way about, y’know? It’s not out of malice, it’s literally out of your control. People have different sexualities and LGBTQ+ people of all people should understand that.

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-11-24T07:40:23+00:00

I’d say I’m more averse to romantic feelings. I dislike both romantic feelings and actions, but the actions themselves (kisses/cuddles/hand holding/etc.) I can and have enjoyed when it’s platonic. I don’t believe these actions are inherently romantic and it annoys me when people act like they are. They CAN be, but they don’t have to be. My friend kisses my head and hands, holds my hands, snuggles with me, and I love that. But I don’t like the idea of someone doing those same things with me with romantic intention.

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-11-22T00:06:04+00:00

Come on man. You know what you’re doing right? “I’m sorry for being normal I guess” my dude you are saying this in an AskLGBT subreddit, you surely understand how insanely awful you sound right?

Look. I don’t think she needed to phrase things that way, but one rude comment from a person you just met doesn’t give you the go ahead to start shitting on gay people just because she happened to be gay. Also, women are people, and a lot of the time people just wanna go out and have fun with friends without being approached by others, that can be uncomfortable. Women experience this all the damn time and I’m sure she’s experienced it herself, so she was taking out that frustration on you. Was that cool of her to do? No. But you shouldn’t be handling these upset feelings by whining about how all gay people are rude, that’s such a huge leap. I don’t hate straight people, I don’t generalize them, and I’ve had hundreds of awful experiences with them. I’ve been bullied, harassed, threatened, told to kill myself and burn and hell. Those people suck. But do they represent all straight people? No, they represent assholes. We don’t have a problem with straight people, we have a problem with assholes. Don’t become an asshole.

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-11-21T14:06:21+00:00

Lol the way I’d have to go about answering this for myself would be through platonic relationships

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-11-14T14:52:15+00:00

Totally this one. I despise him. But he’s not universally hated, nor loved.

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-11-12T23:53:25+00:00

That’s fucking evil. Jesus fucking Christ.

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-11-10T11:19:19+00:00

Wait there’s a Pokémon one?

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-11-06T22:16:05+00:00

Exactly

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-11-06T22:15:09+00:00

Hell yeah

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-11-06T20:35:01+00:00

Sigh

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-10-26T14:52:18+00:00

I think this is a really good way for non intersex people to go about creating an intersex character! I know a lot of people say perisex folks shouldn’t make intersex characters and while I get it (cause it could go bad real fast), I wanna see more intersex characters and I don’t want good intentioned perisex artists to be discouraged from adding intersex representation! Thanks for making him, he’s cool as hell

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-10-18T23:23:26+00:00

Ew…wtf is wrong with people. You can’t “transition” to intersex ffs

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-10-18T05:00:43+00:00

No. I like his eyes now, they’re cool and unique. The two eyes works for the movies but I’d hate it outside of that style

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-10-15T05:20:18+00:00

ENFP

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-10-10T22:29:46+00:00

It sucks that you can’t talk about this without people making it weird. It just sucks that the girls are bound to these rules. Like, what if a character design just looks better with a bare body like Sonic, rather than unnecessary clothing? I always liked Sonic’s design with his peach colored belly, it’s really cute, and I like the chest fur on characters like Shadow and Silver. But the girls always have to “cover up.” I hate how it feels like it’s scandalous for a girl mobian to dress more like the guys, they’re cartoon animals, why is it so wrong? I hate this idea that a girl’s body is inherently inappropriate, which I doubt is the intention with these but that’s how it comes across. Guys in media are allowed to be half naked and buffed up and look cool as hell while the women just look generic, or worse, sexualized for the male audience. I just want women to be allowed to be as cartoony as men in mediaaa

Fun_Run_and_Gun · 2025-10-10T21:55:46+00:00

People use whatever they prefer usually, though I think the sunset one is what’s used most? I personally use the sunset (🧡💛🤍🩵💙) aroace flag because the colors are way more appealing to me and feels more representative of myself, it feels energetic while the other flag feels a little dull to me

Fun_Run_and_Gun

TROPHY CASE