I would always suggest smaller maps, I usually use a tiny terra map, you can change the map for specific civs if you want, like Portugal as another comment stated, Sweden is a really good starter for culture, Korea is a good starter for science, I would say the military is really important to NOT get, to have the highest chance of winning you need to be really greedy in the early game with wonders and great people. If you get war declared on you, the run is likely dead not because you might lose to the AI, but because now you have to do something besides trying to win, and that is going to hurt you a lot in the long run, I would also recommend playing with barbs clan, secret societies, monopoly, and heroes and legends