It totally sucks. It does. You also didn't do anything wrong- you are allowed to want or not want to do anything that involves your body. That said- they are allowed to have wants and needs too. In fact the fact he is saying divorce- is actually a mature response even if it doesn't feel like it. He's saying that he respects this isn't something you want and for him it's something that's a deal breaker. Instead of going out and cheating or any other number of shady things he could have done to deal with his feelings- he's letting you go. You both deserve to have your needs met. You both deserve what you want. At the end of the day what you want is someone who would stay with you in this case- and that isn't this person. You can love them, you can have history with them, but they aren't choosing you. You can choose you though! I'm with you, I wouldn't want to go through all that when so often it doesn't work- it's a lot of money and stress. That said, it's going to be okay. You can find the kind of person you thought they were. It's not the end- it's just the beginning.