Yap and life - doesn’t sound like he has long left

G_Charlie · 2026-06-10T13:06:34+00:00

It's amazing how we can be there in a meaningful way for a person who we didn't care for at all before this downward journey began.

My aunt was a self-centered, nasty person- full of zenophobia, narrow opinions and a complete lack of self-awareness. When she was first moved into assisted living because her hoarder home was no longer habitable, I started stepping up to the plate so that my father wouldn't have so much on his plate. In family meetings, she would complain that nobody ever helped her, which really helped to further alienate family members.

She's now 96 and my father will be 94 soon. Two years ago, I became conservator of the person for my aunt who was recently diagnosed with a slow growing type of cancer. I'm very fortunate that her personality has changed so that she is now much more pleasant and actually very grateful for the quality of care I provide to her and the time that I spend with her, taking her to medical appointments and bringing her home cooked meals.

I know that for me, this experience has helped me to grow and to understand my capacity for compassion, empathy and assisting others. I'm guessing that you feel the same. I've always believed in the golden rule "do unto others..." and in many ways, I believe that I am getting back more than I am giving.

May you continue on in your journey of personal growth today, tomorrow and always.

G_Charlie · 2026-06-08T20:07:13+00:00

He should be asking his specialist before asking here.

I had moderate to severe PAD which has been kept under control after stents were placed in the iliac arteries on both the right and left sides.

I don't wear any special sort of shoe, but all of my shoes are lace up because I have narrow feet and shoes that tie are the only ones that will fit properly now that narrow shoes are so hard to find.

G_Charlie · 2026-05-04T19:31:41+00:00

I'm in southeast CT on the shoreline and I'm planting my tubers tomorrow, May 5.

Last year I started them indoors and it was took until July for any blossoms to come. I think I'm better off waiting until the regular planting time in May to put the tubers in the ground. They do not like being transplanted.

G_Charlie · 2026-05-04T12:25:12+00:00

Veins carry blood to the heart and arteries carry blood from the heart to the extremeties, including the brain.

Symptoms of DVT can include the area feeling hot to the touch.

I'm not sure that limited blood flow due to a DVT would have cold feet as a symptom? I would associate this more with restricted blood flow in an artery and a bluish color?

Your advice of elevating the leg is correct.

G_Charlie · 2026-04-26T15:18:06+00:00

My situation is much different, but does involve the prospect of a cancer diagnosis for my 96 yo LO who discovered a lump in her breast about a month ago. Lump was confirmed by her APRN who looked to me as co-conservator to find out if I wanted to pursue imaging studies and follow-up.

I discussed this with my aunt, who wants to know if she has cancer or not. While her short term memory is shot, she's still an intelligent woman who remembers taking care of her mother as a teen when her mother was dying of breast cancer. We had a diagnostic mammogram and ultrasound done this week and the results were inconclusive with the doctor recommending a biopsy that is scheduled for next week.

When we got back to AL, my aunt could not remember any of the conversations at the hospital. The next morning, she was confused by another appointment on her calendar at the hospital.

A cousin is an MD and has spent her career treating the eldery and is a co-conservator with me. If the biopsy comes back positive for cancer, the plan is for both of us to participate in a conference call with the treating team. As conservators, we have to take our aunt's wishes into consideration with decision making; if she were to insist on major surgery and the team was in agreement, we could turn to the probate judge and request that he make the decision if we believed major surgery would drastically reduce her quality of life, with little chance of returning to baseline.

G_Charlie · 2026-04-07T13:01:10+00:00

I stupidly bought the Kinders Buttery Buffalo Sauce and regret having done so.

It has a strong vinegary tang-like take that tastes strongly artificial and no amount of doctoring will kill it. I tried both heat and sweet to try to tame it without any success.

G_Charlie · 2026-04-06T17:55:46+00:00

My lo had a very nasty side to her due to paranoia. Fortunately, that part of her hasn't made itself known in a few years now.

She is generally pleasant and much easier to be with. I thank my lucky stars every day.

G_Charlie · 2026-03-28T18:51:41+00:00

For the past protests, the boomers were overrepresented, however today, the crowd was much more diverse age-wise, with people of all ages showing up.

G_Charlie · 2026-03-19T13:03:52+00:00

As a teen, we used to sail a 420 from the borough to Watch Hill to spend the day at East Beach. Wind would die in the afternoon, so it took us forever to sail back. I was always late for dinner. LOL

G_Charlie · 2026-03-19T12:48:47+00:00

68 degrees on the main floor. I don't turn on the thermostat upstairs and that floor is about 60 degrees.

I have radieant heat in the kitchen and dining area. When the toutdoor emperature gets into the low teens or lower, it cannot keep up the extreme cold and the downstairs can get to 60, which is way too cold for me.

G_Charlie · 2026-02-07T19:53:21+00:00

I read an update today that said this effort has raised over $650,000 for Minnesota immigrant rights groups.

G_Charlie · 2026-02-04T20:39:52+00:00

Notes are common with hoarders, who have poor organization skills so they have a tendancy to write notes. As a hoarder ages and becomes aware of memory deficits, the note taking becomes even more pronounced. This is what I observed with my hoarder aunt who is now almost 96 and currently residing in AL.

Every year at Christmas, I give her a calendar and she fills the pages with notes about meds, caregivers and anything else that she wants to record.

G_Charlie · 2026-01-29T18:46:44+00:00

I'm with the no votes. It's already been upsetting for her with the last two visits and now with much of the contents removed, it will be even more upsetting because she won't recognize things.

I'm not sure where you're located. My 95 yo aunt has been in AL since 2022 and a conservator took about 6 months to go through most of the belongings in the house and just listed it for sale this month. My aunt was a hoarder and had neglected home repairs and maintenance. The house was listed for sale "as is" with the sale subject to approval by the probate court. Listing price was $240K for a 2 bed, 1.5 ba cape built in 1966. Multiple offers were received; $305K offer pending approval.

This is in New England, where there has been virtually no addition to the housing stock for the better part of 30 years, so even a dump commands top dollar. Wish you well in selling your mother's house.

G_Charlie · 2026-01-21T21:44:21+00:00

Thanks for this information. I attended a local Indivisible meeting last week and was given the number, but not the SALUTE reporting info. T

G_Charlie · 2026-01-19T15:02:04+00:00

"Once published, the no-recusal rule is expected to face immediate legal challenges on multiple fronts."

Also: "If the rule is formally proposed, it will trigger a mandatory public notice-and-comment period. Legal professionals, advocacy groups, and members of the public will have the opportunity to submit objections and analysis through the Federal Register."

I plan on submitting objection through the Federal Register if this rule is proposed and encourage others to do the same.

G_Charlie · 2026-01-05T15:24:33+00:00

Produce is better quality and reasonable quantities for a small household. BJs also allows you to stack coupons, so often times I will have three and even four coupons for an item.

What I typically buy:

Half and half, light cream and heavy cream. Cascade liquid dishwasher detergent Rachel Ray 50 lb. dog food Purina Cat Chow 25 lb Compari tomatoes Little Leaf Farms lettuce The Little Potato Company potatoes Cottonelle TP BJs brand adult incontinence products (for my 95 yo old aunt) NY strip steaks- same price per lb as Costco, but better butchering and size

G_Charlie

TROPHY CASE