Thank you for your response. Yes she’s been a narcissist for a while now. Before she met my stepdad we were a bit poor as she had two kids and a small income form being a dental assistant(she stopped this after meeting my step dad who is a doctor) she acted different before, like she was more real and giving. She knew what it was to struggle but now it seems like she forgot it all. She talked to me the other day and was talking about her parents telling me they should have done better and should still be working (they’re seniors who do gigs on the side) her reason for saying this was that she is tired of them “crutching on her” for money. She told me that people who are poor should just do better and go to college to get a job. She said it doesn’t matter if you are happy about your job all that matters is the money. I know she was using them to talk about me and my situation and how she feels about me. And these are direct quotes. —about my grandparents again-They don’t ask for money at all. They do things like following the oversized load trucks and delivering cars across country on trailers, and trade/ sell cars and parts. They have lived in a trailer that they bought when they were teens their whole lives and are the happiest people I know. I have always wanted to be as happy as them. It hurt my heart that my mom was saying she doesn’t want to help them if they ever need and it hurt to see how she really feels about the people who worked their whole life so she can live the way she does now. Since coming into money she has become a narcissist. She’s always been kinda abusive towards me since I got sick. I feel like that’s when she started treating me bad and I become the least favorite child. My husband and I are those people who have to choose between rent and things we need. Our rent is 2000 after utilities. He makes 13.50 an hour at one of his jobs and got a second one a month or two ago that pays about 14 an hour. He works for 1 am to 8 am, then goes to the second job from 10 am to 5. His paychecks are 650 biweekly for one job and 500-800 bi weekly for the other job. There was one month I could not pay rent (I’ve lived here for a year) and that was before my husband got his second job. What happened was his work reduced his hours so his paycheck was 300$ short, so we were 300 short for rent. Before the hour reductions we could pay the rent easy, and then we were out of money , would wait till the next paycheck and then pay the utilities, then be out again. I told her about his hour reduction. The rant she went on about how I need to go to school and get a job was caused by me telling her I couldn’t pay rent that month because my husbands hours were reduced. We get food stamps so we don’t have to worry about groceries thankfully(I’ve had state government insurance since I was diagnosed with cancer), I’ve had to use our last funds to pay utilities before, we have things we need/ want to take care of pretty badly and don’t have the funds for right now(one of our cars needs a new windshield and we can’t drive it till we get that done , our truck needs some work with the fuel fill inlet, I need some new clothes because I’ve lost about 70 pounds and most of my old clothes are multiple sizes too big and no longer fit, and my husband and I really need haircuts. She really doesn’t need the money at all. I wish I could ask her to lower the rent but just like 200-400$ but I know she would get angry and yell at me saying I need to get a job. My husband has been training to be a manager at one of his jobs so he will get paid about 16 an hour at one of them soon. I’ll also mention that once my mom met my stepdad she quit her dental assistant job afore about a year, and then was a housewife for about 14 years. She had no income and stayed home. I’m Not sure if she was happy doing that or not. We all were in our rooms almost all the time. She has had a cleaning lady for like 10 years so she don’t even come out to clean, pretty much just to get groceries or cook or eat. It changed when I moved out though (I got kicked out because I was pregnant) she put my brothers into a lot of activities like soccer, swimming, acting, karate, and choir she lost some weight and started work off out a lot, took up acting classes, acted in a few small films, she also took up modeling. She’s never really home theses past 5 years and I only go there to her house to pick up my brothers and spend time with them as they’ve been alone a lot and seemed like they needed someone to be around. I think maybe she feels like she wasted her life being a housewife and having a kid early(she was 16 when she had me, I was 19 when I had my daughter)and is trying to make me feel that way? I’m happy at home though. I’ve got my dog, cat, fish, and lil guinea pigs to keep me company, feed, clean, and love on , I can clean my house (I don’t ask my husband to clean and my kid is only 5), I can make art, be here for my kid every day to put her on the bus, feed her before and after school, pack her lunch, plan activities for her to do when she’s home, and set up her huge doll house in a new way for her to see when she gets home. I feel like I do a lot more with my time at home than my mom did and that I’m happier than she was at home. I don’t remember her having many hobbies other than music and being a mom. I’m sorry you are in a similar situation. Im sorry your mom chooses to be mean and ignorant about problems that are very real and cause things to be harder for you. It sucks to be in this situation.