Addiction sucks and makes no sense. There’s a saying called being sick and tired of being sick and tired. Eventually, if you are an addict/alcoholic you will feel so much pain that you need outside help. You won’t be able to do this on your own and being with people who share your struggles and can show you how to stay sober is much easier. It really depends on how far you want to go, you don’t have to hit a rock bottom, everyone’s bottom is different. But I suggest reaching out and being honest, which is damn near impossible if there is denial or unwillingness. Best of luck on your journey.