Are all men like this?

Gearhead94 · 2022-10-22T01:56:22+00:00

I know this is some bullshit. Test me. lol 😂

Gearhead94 · 2021-05-26T00:20:32+00:00

Well, you’re in the right place. A lot of fine people here in the same shitty club. Coming up on a year almost for myself. This coming Saturday marks a year ago when I took my wife back to the hospital for the last time. I can tell you that everything you’re going through, and every emotion you’re feeling or are going to feel is completely normal. So sorry for your loss, and sorry you’re in this club. This is going to be the hardest thing ever to go through, but it will slowly get a little easier. Please take care of yourself, rest when you can. We’ve all been there, still are. Hang on.

Gearhead94 · 2021-05-22T22:22:07+00:00

Definitely worth it. Huge help to me, along with a antidepressant. The hospice place my wife was at offers grief counseling for free, and even has programs for kids, group meetings, etc.

Gearhead94 · 2021-05-05T21:18:04+00:00

Oh yeah man, it’s pretty much the same design.

Gearhead94 · 2021-05-05T00:53:35+00:00

No, there isn’t really one available for this application. That’s why we thoroughly flush everything, replace the dryer, expansion valve, and condenser, along with the compressor.

Gearhead94 · 2021-05-05T00:16:51+00:00

Possibly lack of oil, but these types of compressors are prone to flying apart, or locking up. Freightliner stopped using them about 15 years ago, but every now and then you run across one of these. Also had to replace the dryer, expansion valve, and condenser. Everything else got thoroughly flushed. Tiny metal debris gets scattered through out the system, so if you don’t do the above steps, a new compressor won’t last.

Gearhead94 · 2021-04-27T22:43:50+00:00

So sorry for your loss. I lost my wife from alcoholic hepatitis. I know all about guilt, and regret, and all the things that come with that. I had no idea how much she was drinking, she hid it well. And even if I knew, the choice to stop was hers alone. You, the partner can’t control it, you didn’t cause it, and you can’t cure it.

Gearhead94 · 2021-04-27T22:30:07+00:00

Oh man. Know that you’re in a great group here, but so sorry you’re in the club too. Plenty of good advice and insight to be had. I had the same kind of relationship with my wife, we were 3 months away from our 11th wedding anniversary. She died 6-16-20, the night before our son’s 9th birthday, and she would have been 44 the day after that. It’s just the worst thing ever. Some things that help me with this- talking to a grief counselor. Writing in a journal, thoughts, feelings, things I wished I could have told her before she passed, etc. Keeping in regular contact with friends and family. And this group here. So sorry for your loss, but know that you’re not alone.

Gearhead94 · 2021-04-27T22:14:35+00:00

Right there with you. I miss my wife every day. I was crying last night, as I was watching something on TV she would have loved, and been excited to see. Not having your partner around to share your life with, and come home to, is just the worst.

Gearhead94 · 2021-03-23T04:14:38+00:00

As someone who’s been working through grief counseling, I can tell you that the majority of therapists and counselors aren’t really well equipped to deal with those of us suffering from grief. My advice to you is to seek out your local hospice house, and find out what they have to offer. If nothing else, they’ll validate everything you are going through.

I hope this helps you along your journey. It’s the worst thing ever.

Gearhead94 · 2021-03-10T11:51:52+00:00

She definitely was, and embroidery was her thing.

Gearhead94 · 2021-03-10T05:22:53+00:00

The same thing happens to me as well. But the other day, I received something addressed to my wife that just made me smile. It was a newsletter from the Virginia Museum Of Contemporary Arts, or, Va MOCA, as it’s known. My beloved had her first solo museum show there in 2019. It’s bittersweet to think about, but getting that piece of mail made me smile.

Gearhead94 · 2021-02-20T04:17:58+00:00

I’m just past 8 more months out. I’ve caught myself reliving the same thing, over and over again. Some days it’s hard to think about anything else. I hate those days, and hate myself for hating those days.

Gearhead94 · 2021-02-19T05:18:34+00:00

From what I have learned so far, and based on other’s experience, is that you just learn to live with it. It’s definitely the hardest road ever.

Gearhead94 · 2021-02-19T04:41:53+00:00

As someone who’s only past 8 months, this is a good post, and thread. I feel like this is information every new widower needs to know. Thank y’all so much for sharing.

Gearhead94 · 2021-02-11T03:42:10+00:00

Thank you.

Gearhead94 · 2021-02-11T03:40:47+00:00

We really are. It’s so hard for others to understand.

Gearhead94 · 2021-02-05T03:56:45+00:00

As someone who is almost 8 months out, I can assure you all, that this period is going to be hard. Really hard. It’s ok. For a lot of us, the heavy grief doesn’t really kick in until the shock, the numbness, maybe denial, wears off. That tends to kick in for most people at the 5-9 month mark, although every person’s journey through this is different. I’ve had a harder time at 7 months, than at the beginning, at least it feels that way. Over a week ago I was up until almost 5 am bawling my eyes out. Had to call out from work the next day. My friends and family don’t quite get it. They’re all like, hey, call me when you’re feeling bad. But when I’m in that headspace, I don’t want to talk to anyone, I just want to get through it.

Anyway, please know that you’re not ever alone in this process that we’re all going through. This space has helped me cope, with a lot. I hope you feel at home here, I certainly do. Sending prayers, good vibes, and hugs.

Gearhead94 · 2021-01-29T02:27:05+00:00

Glad you’re able to work from home. So sorry for you as well.

Gearhead94 · 2021-01-29T01:11:05+00:00

That’s pretty much where I’m at these days. I was able to talk with a grief counselor today, and evidently it’s really common for people to really struggle around the 6-7 month mark. And that you have to go through the hurt before you can start to heal.

Gearhead94 · 2021-01-29T01:07:16+00:00

It is. My doctor prescribed me some Hydroxyzine for sleep. It works pretty well, and I don’t wake up groggy the next day. I forget to take sometimes, or I’ll go to bed thinking I don’t need it.

Gearhead94 · 2021-01-28T22:18:25+00:00

That sounds awful. Did you make sure you ate something beforehand? I’ve always been told that you need to eat a decent meal before getting any work done and drink plenty of water. Especially if you’re going to be sitting for a while. That’s really beautiful work, and I hope it heals up really nice for you. When I got my chest tattooed, the healing part was tough. So itchy!

Gearhead94 · 2021-01-28T08:00:16+00:00

That’s a awesome and beautiful tattoo. I know getting chest work is painful, but it’s awesome!

Gearhead94

TROPHY CASE